My daughter in the car yesterday – “I’m about 95% sure I’m bisexual,” she said.
“Yeah?” I was surprised. She’s mentioned this for nearly a year but never so committed. “Is that what you think?”
“Yeah.”
She laid out her evidence and it was compelling.
“There are still some pieces of the puzzle missing,” she said. “Just a couple pieces or the one piece that goes in the middle that will finish it but I can see what the picture is going to be.”
I stared.
“What?”
“Nothing. It’s okay if you’re bisexual, you know that. I want you to live your life the same way I live mine. You just live, honey. That’s all you need to do. I’m staring at you because I just can’t believe how well you express yourself. You’re 12, you know. That’s a pretty comprehensive understanding of how life works and I am shocked.
She laughed.
~~
And today using her model… well I can see the puzzle of my life forming too. But I am nowhere near as trusting and / or accepting as my daughter is and I blame my Capricorn.
If you have a lot of Capricorn you have to plan for the sky to fall or you head to come off your shoulders and roll down the hill at pretty much any moment. But I think I could take a lesson from my daughter here.
To her, 95% of the pieces in place translates 95%, done deal.
In contrast, 95% of the places in piece in my life translates to 3-4% done deal. Is that terrible? Gah.
If I TRY, I can get the percentage up to about 20 or 25… but that’s it!
What about you? If you can see the picture 95% formed, do you trust the other pieces to fall in place? How much Capricorn you packin’?
I have no Capricorn, and so much sadge, but I’m the sky is falling kind of person anyways. Saturn does square/oppose most of my planets and asc. so I bet that explains that.
No Capricorn. Some tenth house but I’m not terribly cautious.
Cap Sun / Moon and totally understand what you mean. I drive a Virgo friend of mine nuts because where he sees one positive outcome of a situation, I can imagine that one positive, a couple neutral, and a few negatives…and I want to plan for them all. It can be paralyzing.
Cappy Moon as part of grand earth trine, and also squaring my Venus, Saturn, Mercury, Sun.
I can trust others maybe 2% on a good day.
Sadge sun… Cap ascendant. Do you have any idea how confused I am? 😉
When I see 95% of the picture, I can always assume what the remaining 5% will be. Unfortunately, life has shown me that I will always, without a doubt, pick the wrong 5%, especially if I predict that I’ll pick the wrong 5% and compensate for my wrongness ahead of time.
I have no Capricorn and my 10th house is empty, but I still can’t say that I trust the other pieces to fall.
This is one issue that I think is more nuture than nature. I have been severely “beat down” in the past regarding my expectations, and have learned to either expect/plan for the worst or act like nothing’s doing.
However, I do have Saturn conjunct my Sun, so. . . Hell. Maybe there’s something to all this astrology stuff after all. 😉
If 95% of the pieces are in place, I generally don’t even care what the other pieces are – I’m going to make it work…lol. Sun (Virgo) and Moon (Taurus) in fixed houses, stellium in Libra in the 8th/9th houses and Sagittarius rising. Uranus in Scorpio conj NN on MC from the 9th. In short, lots of Sagittarius and Pluto/Libra…
I could never be as careless in love, though – in that department I need to know all the details, please! Saturn in Leo in the 7th; the only planet to occupy a personal house in my natal. (“Oh these little rejections how they seem so real to me;
One forgotten birthday I’m all but cooked and
How these little abandonments seem to sting so easily; I’m 13 again am I 13 for good? -Alanis Morissette).
I am trusting life more the older I get. I don’t have any planets in Capricorn, but I do have Saturn conjunct Sun. I think this increased trust has something to do with having Jupiter in Pisces.
This tends to work out in a somewhat Saturnian way, though – I still admit the possibility that my head might roll off my shoulders, but I trust that the lesson it brings will be beneficial. I’m not so much trying to stop it from rolling off anymore.
…Cap in Mars…
Is it strange that I alternate? I mean, at the beginning, or when I’m in dire straits, I’ll be certain that everything’s going to fall apart. For about two days. Then I can do the big picture thing. And after that, I’m good. Minorly frustrated, because I know it’s all going to work out and I’m too impatient to wait that long, but otherwise good. 🙂
Kudos to your daughter! I realized I was bi at 12, but my parents are less encouraging than you are, so it was kept hush hush until, well, last year — 20 years later!! — when my brother told my father that I was listed as bi on my MySpace! EEK!! Dad was good with it, but it’s not something we will openly tell my mother.
Kudos to you, too, for being such a great mom. 🙂
Is the Mercury and MC in Capricorn enough to make me shake all the time? Even though I’m a triple fire person? It does.
awesome post elsa 🙂 that’s exactly how it is for me – couldn’t have said it any better. but I agree with CD, after a while you notice that it does all fit together. Negative experiences have created the right conditions for my most positive experiences to happen. Almost like a wave, you hit the bottom and then trust that you will come up again…and it happens like that for every important lesson again and again. I guess you develop an appreciation and respect for the negatives as much as the positives – they are life’s best learning opportunities!! 🙂
95% to me is yes, it’s happening, we’ll just have to see the details come together. but i’m flexible-highly mutable chart, so i know whatever happens, i’ll figure it out, man.
no cap other than a 10th house moon. 🙂
I have a lot of sadge and I feel very identified why my geminii moon so, whith the 5% of the puzzle i can see the whole thing completed. With the 45% of the puzzle I think it is really completed and I want to go to another interesting thing. However (however) now I have a capricorn moon progresed and….. I feel an inusual drive to my job… And I have an inusual serenity , I expected that feeling of insecurity instead,… not I feel that sort of calmness.
(Correction I am in capricorn in a few days however I can’t avoid the sense of antiocipation)
Some few words for your daughter, usually the 95% of children in that age are insecure of the sexual orientation (may be the 95% of the people I think :)) it is a good idea to see the movie about Kinsey…
crazy moon – I’ve seen that movie and told my daughter many times she is going through puberty all kinds of feelings can emerge. I tell her that she can identify herself however she wants (she announced her bisexuality at school last year… took heat and rescinded it_)… but that I will consider the issue up for grabs until she was through puberty and her hormones settled down.
But I also tell her than she is in the best position to know how she feels and it she does settle on something and she feels sure about it, I will take her word for it until and unless she comes up with another word… and last that I have no preference whatsoever which I don’t because my daughter has been born and I am sure there is no error.
sometimes yes, sometimes no.
i have no capricorn.
but if my saturn/mercury/uranus t square gets in on it i can go into mental lockdown worrying over a triviality.
i had a similar conversation with my daughter when she was about 10 or 11…she was concerned about being bi or gay. i told her she had lots of hormone activity, and it’s hard to tell how it’s going to shake out, but regardless, i’m sure whatever works out would be fine.
eventually, she decided she was definitely straight. but what really mattered to me was that she was comfortable with the process and knows she’ll be loved and accepted regardless of how it worked out. i think we’re there. 🙂
I only have a Cap midheaven, but my mum has a whole heap. She’s very pessimistic and fearful and she’s passed it on to all us kids to varying degrees. Same as the children of concentration camps inmates grow up fat and afraid.
If I see 95% of the puzzle complete, I assume a dog came by and ate one of the pieces. “Hope for the best, plan for the worst.”
And yeah, I have a shitton of Cap 😉