Dear Elsa,
I have been seeing a Scorpio man for five weeks. When I first met him, he was very intense. Apparently, he travels a lot for his work. I like him a lot and feel like there is potential for a wonderful relationship.
The only thing he is hot and cold all the time. He began to pursue me intensely, bought me two expensive perfumes and a $600 spa treatment for Christmas. We have had a couple of communication bumps and I realized that he was sensitive. We have not had sexual relations until recently, this past weekend.
He has mentioned me to his family but when he does not like what I say, he criticizes my way of expressing myself or at least makes note of it. It seems like I am under a microscope.
He mentions that he thinks he would like me to meet his friends in Wisconsin, since he is here on business for four months but then he gets cold and I do not hear from him for 4 days or I do not know if we have plans for the upcoming weekend.
He has three female friends that call him regularly. One is a coworker, another a girl from this hometown who is unhappily married and another in Wisconsin. When I make a comment about them, he said, they call him, he doesn’t call them.
He has been open with me about his life. He is presently taking medications for various problems, an antidepressant, a anti psychotic medication and a patch for ADHD.
He was drinking a lot in his life and his job sent him to a program to get help. He has confided in me that the programs never worked in the past and that he has a biological problem and would drink because it made him feel better. At one point he was drinking from 10am to 4pm. To his credit, he has been honest and in fact has shared just about everything with me. He seems to want to be successful in this program.
I guess, I am a bit confused. I decided to stop calling him. He was calling me, then we had a bump and now I call and he doesn’t. Last weekend we were together, he cooked for me, took me out to movies and spent the entire weekend inside with me but he has not called me since.
Double Libra
United States
Dear Libra,
This sounds like a clear case of WYSIWYG (What You See Is What You Get) to me. This man has a full life. His life is full of people, a job, an addiction and mental illness and it seems to me he is living it.
You on the other hand are trying to make decisions about your life based on this other person’s comings and goings and progress and/or lack of progress and it is not hard to see this is going to lead you to nothing and nowhere.
Rather than focusing on what he is doing, it would be far more productive to focus on what you are doing – which as a double Libra may be a challenge so I will try to help.
You are doing what comes natural to Libra: you are trying to partner, though you are going about it all wrong. You are trying to decide (Libra) if you might be able to take this other person and see if you can’t fashion them (read control them) into something that will be suitable as a partner, which is never going to work.
This is particularly true of a psychotic, depressed, ADHD, disappearing, alcoholic Scorpio who has a bunch of women hanging around so yeah. If you want a partner which I think you do, I would look elsewhere.
Good luck.
Life as a Scorpio is all about handling intensity. Your man has his hands full learning how to handle the kind of focus we Scorpios have. Until he learns to work things out in a healthy way, he’ll likely be all over the place the way he is now. It doesn’t sound like he’s going to get there any time soon and even if he was, we Scorpios are not really the type to be controlled. The guy is open and honest about who and where he is, the only question is whether you are willing and able to have him as a partner, knowing where he is right now.
wel i think libra shouldnt look else where. he loves her a lt and she should understand tat
Libra,
Run as far and fast as you can from this Scorp. I am a Scorpio man who has had problems in the past. Dated a Libra girl and was honest with her too. But it was me not her that needed to get my life on track and no person can help, it has to be done by the Scorpio himself and he must really want to change.
Even if that happens, the difference in the 2 signs will eventually pull you both apart. If you are very good looking, he may seem to change and seem like he’s coming around but in my opinion it will only be false hope and you will be hurt or disappointed again and again. Sorry to say this but I wish I understood more when I was dating the Libra girl.
Rules can be broken but unless you want an up & down, hot & cold relationship you will be fustrated and it will not end nice. If it ends with a Scorpio, you can count on NOT being friends with him after all is done, it usually never works for Scorpio’s to stay friends after a failed relationship. Scorpio’s are a good rebound, short term, or to have as a friend when you’re looking for the right guy. Try a Gemini, Leo.