Something has been dogging me over the last few months. I’ve not been able to resolve it. It’s done nothing but get worse! I finally drug out my chart to diagnose the problem.
As it turns out, Saturn in Aquarius is opposing my natal Uranus in Leo. Transiting Saturn and Uranus are squared off at this time which exacerbates the situation. I feel pressure to express my individual creativity. When I respond to the pressure, invariably I’m rejected?
One this happens to you, one million times, you get scared. Especially when your income relies on people accepting you. Next thing you know, you’re hamstrung and that’s where I’m at today. I’m going to offer details so I’m not misconstrued.
I have an unusual background. There is absolutely nothing I can do about this. Believe me, I’ve spent my life trying to merge with traffic. It’s like the Beverly Hillbillies moving to the city.
I’m often blindsided by assumptions people make about me. Sometimes I challenge them but usually I don’t. This is because I just don’t have the time. But it annoying.
I get tagged in various ways. I feel like an unfortunate Christmas tree, getting ugly ornaments applied to me, followed by strings of popcorn; finished with chunks of seaweed flung onto my branches. Am I’m supposed to stand there!
I try to ignore this as much as possible. I’m a Saturn Neptune type and a Venus Neptune type. I know how to transcend. But recently I’ve come to understand crazy-significant differences between me and most people that can be attributed to my personal life experience. I like these differences! If I have any gift at all, it’s probably tied to these oddities.
Unfortunately people tend to assign pathologies to a person like me. I know this and I’ve known it for decades. I’m not you, so what’s my diagnosis? Whatever you say it is; you can convince yourself! But I don’t think you’ll convince me because I live in my body and I surely know better!
Recently, I came across an “educated” explanation of the phenomena. Apparently when a person has an individual world view developed under the influence of non-typical conditions, people will pass moral judgment on them. People just don’t like, “tall poppies”, black sheep or really, oddities of any kind.
This is a great topic for Saturn vs Uranus in general. Crush the individual – yay! But Uranus in Leo brings creativity into the equation. There’s a lot of pressure to crush an individual’s creative product. Color in the lines or else! Keywords for search!
I’ve got to push back against this, clearly. In reality (Saturn) my unusual (Uranus) upbringing at the hands of my mega-Aquarian (Uranus) parents (Saturn), allows me to see things most people can’t. I’m also willing to share what I see – offering not just an outside perspective but an out-of-bounds view you can’t find anywhere else.
This reminds me of when someone asked me if I was an idiot savant.
Yeah, kinda.
Whatever I am, I have no way to go back in time to receive the typical curriculum that would allow me to better fit in. But put a chart in my hand and that thing talks to me, period.
Oh boy, you’re talking about me as well. In my 40’s, I basically gave up trying to explain myself. I’m in my mid-60’s now, I run from people who want to be friends. I’m just a misfit loner. I’m a *happy* misfit loner, and get off my lawn.
I don’t know how my chart shows it, but I’m sure it does.
Thought you’d like to visit (revisit?) this- No Rain video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qVPNONdF58
Visit, not revisit. I’ve never seen that in my life.
No TV, lol. This is one of the main things that have made me odd. But I like it. Thanks. 🙂
I’ve never seen the official music video for that song but now will always hear it differently. Thanks!
This is the first time anyone has explained this so well. I relate! Once I realized my ‘oddities’ were my gift! ‘it’ made sense to me, and that. Was all it took. Since then, I’ve refined my Self to those wonderful gifts, and it’s made all the difference. Sure I still wriggle inside time to time…well daily, actually. But. That’s part of the price, and I think it’s small considering everything else I get to be.
Hi Elsa. I so get this!! I’ve got the Uranus in Leo aspect conjunct my Sun in late cancer. Different is my middle name!!
I definitely had the Clampett parents (one of our favourite family shows) ~ we moved from smalltown living to a middle/upper middle-class suburb- big raffle raffle family w alcoholic mother and workaholic father. We never got cared for much (to say the least ) ~ and we never fit in because we were so ramshackle.
Tough at times and yet also freeing. Free to be myself. I found other misfits to hang out in high school – musicians and artists and out of the box thinkers – so no complaints there.
Still, I’ve been a bit of a loner even in a crowd – it’s taken a life to learn to accept my own uniqueness and celebrate it.
I love how you share your personal stories! Keep on being you!!
Haha some good typos – raggle taggle family!
completely relate to this and grapple with it myself for same reasons
The biggest reason I prefer your spin is your uniqueness. You make most of us feel less like misfits, b/c you have such a live and learn attitude. I say, take it easy on yourself,if you can. You might be an acquired taste, but you are preferred by many folks.
Ditto; me too. It’s quite possible there’s more of us “non-mainstream” people to the point we are actually the unrecognized majority. No need to ask permission, that’s wisdom of age. Just be ourselves,kind,open. Cheers.
I was thinking that the kind of people that are on astrology sites might be part of that demographic!
Elsa, your ‘oddity’ is actually your divine gift. Those who don’t appreciate it have no eyes to see nor ears to hear. Their comprehension is limited to the ‘typical’ view and just can’t get out of their tiny mind prison. I guess somewhere it’s all jealousy. My Chiron is in Aquarius and I can definitely relate. You are an eagle with a sharp overview while they only understand their own chicken-like affairs. Keep shining. The dogs bark but the caravan moves on. Much love🙏
Thank you, C. 🙂
I also have Saturn in Aquarius and Uranus in Leo. They are not in opposition though. I am the black sheep of my family and community. I am starting to like it though. This second Saturn return has really been a period of growth for me. Love your blog. Just ordered a progression chart analysis. I have Venus in Scorpio and Moon in Capricorn in my progressed chart. Challenging. Thanks for your honesty on your blog.
As a fellow misfit, closing in on my 2nd Saturn return, I have thought about this topic more than a few times.
I believe there are many people who aren’t typical, and I’m not so sure “the majority” is, in fact, the actual majority. You’ve probably heard of the “silent majority”, which is the vast preponderance of the populace who may disagree with the agreed upon “majority view”, but choose to just keep their thoughts to themselves. Maybe they want to be thought to fit in, or maybe they just don’t care to debate the issue. Not everyone wants to be a poster child for the opposing side, and get shouted down, even though anyone with sense will realize they are correct.I think it’s often the stupid, vapid views that are pushed out by the media and others, because they have an agenda which may not be in our best interest. Many folks have better things to do with their time than to constantly play Don Quixote.
I should add that I’m a longtime reader and always find your thoughts interesting. I am intrigued that you often see things differently than I’ve ever considered. Whether I end up agreeing with you or not isn’t even the point. You expand my mind, and I love that! You are a voice that we don’t hear anywhere else, and that’s why we always come back for more.
Reading this, I feel like a martyr!
Well, then I’ve said the wrong thing. I meant no offense. Please delete my comments if you find them hurtful. I have great admiration for you.
No problem! You didn’t do anything wrong. This was my response but you’re not responsible for it. It’s mega-Pisces out there at the moment. It’s like a mirage in all directions (to me). Something to experience but not necessarily take serious.
It’s like going into a haunted house on Halloween. You may feel scared but you’re not really at risk!
I’m sorry you get things hung on you E, I likes you the way you are. 🙂
Thanks for the support. I appreciate it greatly!
I have Uranus in Leo too. This explains a lot to me!
I have transiting Saturn in Aquarius (in the 1st) opposing my natal (7th H) Uranus right now, too, Elsa. If only that was all. It’s also conjunct my natal 1st H Chiron and squaring my Mars in Scorpio on the MH. Along with Pluto finally transiting over my 28 Cap ASC, for now anyway. So much fun in the sun. Seriously, knowing this has paralyzed me, while fully understanding I need to take action, because it all already seems predetermined to fail. Or as a tarot reader told me recently, “You’re going to get a job, but it’s not going to last. But you already know that.” I’m at the “why bother, then?” stage, but it’s a bit more complicated than that (if only piles of riches came with Pluto crossing the ASC transit as a reward for living through it!). Well, to be clear, I’ve interviewed from April 2021 to Jan 2022 straight without one job offer. Talk about rejection. (I’d should add I never interviewed once before the age of 50 when I *didn’t* get a job offer.)
I reread your Pluto transiting your ASC post today and really relate to this: “I’m avoiding most people right now.” It’s difficult at best. I’ve spent the afternoon reading blog posts about T Pluto crossing ASC trying to mine the best inspiration of the good that will come from this.
On the upside, this combo configuration has been scaring the sh*t out of me for months now and I realized today: Well, I’ve lived thru it like everything else. I’m still not sure what to do but guess I better go do something even if it’s not going to last!
The upcoming eclipses hit my 23 Scorpio MH & 23 Taurus IC and I want to move and get a new job; just not multiple times over the next two years.
I keep telling people “I’m in the 4th quarter.” I didn’t have spine issues during Pluto in the 12th, but rather dental issues. I’ve lost three teeth over the past two years and the last one (removed yesterday) really upset me because I got a root canal in January, but it cracked before I could get it crowned. One of the three is waiting for an implant. It’s really upset me for some reason. Aging; not for the faint of heart.
Not sure what I expected but pretty sure I didn’t expect to be here at this age. But who expected a two-year pandemic or a war in Ukraine? On the days it’s all too much, I just hide, and self soothe to the best of my ability.
T Uranus in my 3rd H, along with all of the above, has kicked up a lot of sibling / family dust.
My three Sag planets in the 10th have had a very hard time mustering any optimism lately. I’ve cried more than I care to admit over the past two years; not just for me, but re: COVID, deaths (my cat and stepdad died), the planet, our country, war … the state of humanity. Did you cry a lot during this Pluto transit?
I’ve also fallen down the astrology rabbit hole; been reading everything, listening to podcasts, following my chart transits compulsively and wonder: Does knowing this make it better or worse? Does it explain the why of what’s happening but not change anything? Does it freeze us in our tracks? One astrologer says, “The astrology is 50% and you’re the other 50%.” On top of all of the above, I feel like I’ve failed my chart. How does this help me? After 35 years as a hobby, I still don’t know!
I’m sorry it’s so hard. It is one jacked thing to go through, that’s for sure.
Thanks; likewise. I want to thank you for writing about this so diligently, persistently, and honestly for over a decade. That amazes me. It’s truly such a resource for everyone going through it. That’s how I found you a while ago. Not only writing about it but giving people a safe place to share how it is for them. *Thank You, Elsa!*
I just read your recent post re: Saturn Sq Uranus coming back later in 2022 and I was like, “Um, I need to get my a** in gear!”
Lately I’ve wondered am I going crazy? Then say, no, it’s just all the pressure from the transits.
But one thing I really feel is that literally everyone has had a rough two years in one way or another. It feels like no one has gotten off the hook. My two longest BFFs; one faced uterine cancer and the other had to end her nursing career and go on disability due to Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension, something I’d never heard of before 2020.
It feels like the whole world (or a very large percentage anyway) is suffering and it’s really hard not to feel it.
It’s been 22 years! I’ve pretty much written, daily, for 22 years! And you’re welcome! 🙂
Sorry; I should have been clearer: I thank you for documenting Pluto transiting your 12th house and then crossing your ASC as honestly and diligently as you did. When you Google it, you find lots of: It will be hard, you’ll need psychotherapy, you will be forever changed once it crosses your ASC, but nothing like your autobiographical posts of the experience.
It is amazing and impressive you’ve written an astrology blog for 22 years straight; that’s some Capricorn Rising stuff right there. But sharing your own experience of a very difficult transit and distilling it into lessons is lionhearted. 🙏
Uranus in Leo for roll call.
I have the most unusual childhood. I find it hard to explain to people and when I have some don’t even believe it. It was not only strange and unusual, back then it was unheard of and to people it was a scandal and something I was taught to be ashamed of even though I knew I had no control over it. I spent a lifetime trying to overcome it, but the thing is, you can’t, and you never do. It’s just your life and how you came in.
Further, this is how people judged me all my life. I was judged for my parents and what they did. And I must be defective because of it when what happened was…. to me they were a book on what NOT to do and I never once did any of the things they did. Still, it’s like a neon sign I wear around my neck … flashing… this one must be broken. Look at her parents. Her mother was… so she must be.
My grandparents came in and did shield me from a lot of it, but it was still there, and everyone knew it. What this meant for me was that I was not to be included in certain groups. See, if my parents were xyz then I had to be defective. There has never really been a way to escape it. Once someone finds out your dad went off the reservation you are looked at differently no matter how hard you try to do the opposite of them. Then you have the folks that label you and the ones that feel sorry for you. I didn’t need a label or pity. I just had a different life experience from any and every kid I knew.
Also, I am not mad at my parents. We have made peace. They have both apologized. My father has asked me to write about it. He said, set the record straight. Write the story and if it gets too hard have someone help you write the story. It’s a huge story and someone will read it. It may help someone in a similar situation understand how you have been able to navigate through what your mother and I put you through. He said, I hope you do write about it so that people can see that you did a good job overcoming a terrible hardship that your mother and I were responsible for.
I can’t see what others can’t like you, but I sure have a lot of empathy for children and the elderly and anyone who has survived or is trying to survive hardship. Maybe that is my special sauce. I am going to get a kid out of a bad situation if it takes moving a mountain. So… that is something.
Moral judgment has been passed against me for as long as I can remember. I remember being a little kid and not understanding it at all. I just knew I was not to be included. I was that kid, teen, and have been that adult all my life.
I have Venus/Neptune too.
I can relate to the Uranus in Leo, have same and Aquarius patenting. You refer a lot to abuse I’ve wondered and asked before if you’re an inter generational satanic ritual and government abuse survivor as well?
A different topic I thought you may have considered since you tend to look ahead is how do you compare the upcoming Pluto & Saturn in Aquarius Wesley’s the January 2030 conjunction in Capricorn m?
I’m not. I was never exposed to Satanism when I was a kid and I have no ties to the government, then or now.
I don’t know what this is:
“Pluto & Saturn in Aquarius Wesley’s the January 2030 conjunction in Capricorn m”
I googled it and still don’t know. Sorry!
Okay thanks, when I hear people talk about severe abuse in childhood i think of my own.
Oh I made a mistake I thought Pluto being in Aquarius March 21-June 11, and Saturn to March 7, 2023 I see now they’ll be just missing each other in that sign by two weeks, so Pluto will be in Pisces already instead, sorry.
Thank you for responding and your continual insightful observations!
No problem! I’m sorry you had to go through hell!
That’s so kind of you! Likewise! So glad you turned out okay, and your sister too 😉