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Greed vs Fear

Elsa
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 Elsa
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A lot of times I read about "greed". Greed of boomers for example.

It occurs to me, in many cases, greed is not the core problem, it's fear. Massive fear that may or may not be rational.

What do you think?

 

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soup
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Like compared to hoarding? Boomers watched parents and grandparents, listened to their stories about the great depression... so fear of not having enough? 

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Elsa
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@soup yes.  Like a boomer may have plenty, but what if.. what if, dementia, what if...

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soup
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  1. @elsa yeah... I think this could and in many cases be true. My mother.... the things she held onto  😳 not clippings from our 1st haircut... money,  assets  and even bread wrappers. Like someone was coming to take everything away.  
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Elsa
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@soup it's not just security. There's buying love to consider,  and control.

A person is aging, they think their money keeps them relevant. Like if they passed it along,  they'd be forgotten. 

I had a client, both parents quite rich. Her mother died, the family fortune went to the sister aka her aunt.  Everyone was  to kiss her ass.

Client was a Sadge. Not willing to ass kiss. She really didn't expect to be cut out, but this is what happened, 

The gal died, and gave the money to her children and my client's sister.  Quite a bit. Had it been split equally, 12 million, each?

Anyway, my client assumed her sister would split with her, but she did not. Client had no kids, her sister did.  This was her justification.  Client was stunned,  as she would have split it, and I am certain she would have.

Anyway, there are reasons like this, to hoard.  Again, to stay relevant, have power and control.

To be thorough, the client with no children would have willed the money to her sister's kids, so they would have gotten it anyway.  Keep in mind they had plenty anyway.

The sisters were very close, prior to this. The person who left the money in the first place intended it to be split equally, between his two daughters.  Why he did clarify this in his will.. don't know. But the person who did this caused terrible harm. Mad you're dying, so you screw someone like this. Can't do it, unless you're holding the cards. 

Wills are so important.  I have seen a number of situations,  the will was marvelously well thought out. If you have substantial wealth,  you can't spend too much on making sure it's right. But I think it's better to give, consistently.  Otherwise you agevand everyone is just waiting for you to drop. People just can't let go, but eventually we all find, you can't take it with you.

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Hades Moon
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I agree with what’s been said. Deep rooted ( often unconscious) fear, would usually be the motivator. Whatever people experience, or are exposed to as kids has a huge influence on their financial/material attitudes and behaviours as adults.

I have also known a couple of people who came from privilege and on the surface they do appear greedy. No amount of money or assets is never enough for them and they don’t share it around with their family etc. Some joke that they falsely believe that they can take the money with them and would prefer it in their coffin rather then pass anything onto others. So, although these cases may not be too common, they do exist. Unfortunately, I think some people are just plain mean and greedy.

 

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Allie
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Interesting! I think fear is something I’ve seen with my mother and others in her generation. But power can be another reason. There’s no power in my mother keeping every single plastic container ever. That’s just some fear but also some attempt to control (have power) in her life just in case [insert reason].

There is something I have seen in people and maybe this isn’t the same thing: acquiring wealth or upper income status as a power move for security (in case divorce or independent financial choices), to buy expensive gifts for loved ones, and to add to household for a nice lifestyle. But then dropping comments on how shocked people are when they learn how much they make (I would never in any realm of existence, ask what someone makes because it’s gauche and I don’t care).

(want to add that having wealth is cool if you want to or it happens to you. No judgement. The above was an observation. I want people to be happy and successful.)

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