its definitely not a fun energy, it feels heavy and gross. and depressing and sad.
just so heavy that i can't wait to unbury myself.
nothing of significance really happened but alot of misery i am getting from everyone's energy around. And if they're not miserable, they are just meh... trodding..
I was prepared to feel the heaviness too, but I didn’t. I felt light. I don’t understand. I have Moon conjunct Pluto natally, maybe that is why? It is a familiar energy?
I am not talking about my reaction to the election which does not make me feel light.
It opposed my Zero Leo moon conjunct transit Mars here. Squaring chiron. I woke up to the fact that my current job assignment is toxic and my longterm houseguest/friend has become toxic. I have been postponing her inevitable bottom. Both hurting me so much I have been shutting my heart down. (My codependency/CPTSD) It was a sudden inner crisis to save myself. Thats how change usually is for me. Never smooth and easy or slow. Bad pattern, but it is mine. Uranus 7 H?
Sudden Unexpected events (miracles) keep happening to support me through this. Every turn I have BIG signs I did the right thing. My flow instantly kicked up. I'm feeling love and joy again.
I kicked out the guest. And I took leave from my job. Using FMLA.
I was scheduled to work all holidays with only $6.00/hr extra.LOL. I will now have all the holidays off with my mom, who is doing GREAT through her chemotherapy (the doctors are all shocked). I will be hosting Thanksgiving in my home for the first time in MANY years. I will be doing some traveling. Make some changes. Look for a better job.
I'm feeling great cleansing/healing my home, my body, my spirit, my mind. It feels like a fresh new start. I have weekly spa appointments scheduled through November. Had to apply for Medicare, I'll be 65 in January.
I have been so toxic. I am political. Being a midwife all my life IS political and it's my life. I'm sorry I have had to stop posting here and other places because I cannot control myself from dropping snarky political comments.
I feel like I made it through the knothole. Pop astrology makes this moon pluto mars transit doomy. DArk night of the soul. But I feel like I woke up from a nightmare. ie I feel better. Personally.