Would you do it? If you had no kids. Or have you? How did it go?
I have always not been judgmental of this, I wouldn’t want to be judged for it if it were me.
I am in a relationship with someone with 3 kids. Been talking for 5 months, kinda dated on and off. But Officially in a relationship for about a month now.
When we were first together he had his kids on weekends. We had week nights to be able to go to the gym together and hangout etc. which was going well.
Now his schedule changed, he has 2 of his kids during the week. And 1 on weekends. Now we have no days together. I can only see him after 8pm everyday after they go to bed and I get up for work at 430am I end up staying late getting 4-5 hours sleep each night which is starting to get exhausting.
At first when he got the news of the schedule change of having the kids during the week I thought it was good, we would have weekends together. But now the other mother of the 3rd kid has him having the kid all weekend pretty much.
So I guess now we only have 8pm on… and I have to go there after the kids go to sleep because we are taking our time before I’m introduced into the kids lives.
I know he can’t help it, and I told him we will make it work. But it’s starting to get to me.
I adore him. He treats me great. Spoils me. Compliments me endlessly. Still chases me.
But I’m sorta stressing out about this…
kinda feeling like I have to sneak in and out to see him lol
he is worth trying for, but I’m getting a little restrained since the recent schedule change.how long can we do this? No date nights?
If I have party’s or friends get togethers would he ever be able to attend?
it’s making it hard to feel like we are actually dating etc.
but he puts the most effort where he can. He’s wonderful.
but I’ll always be 4th in line. I never wanna come before the kids, I knew what I was getting into. But he would be my 1st in line…
Anyone had similar experience ? Is it worth it? What was the outcome?
all advice is deeply appreciated because I’m starting to overthink things and I’m tryin to be as optimistic as possible.
I think these are only questions you can answer for yourself because they relate to your values and personal needs and where you are at in your life. You’re right though in that you will never be number 1 in his life.
For me though? I think it says a lot about a man that he is dedicated to his kids. But ya, it’s a whole different lifestyle, having children and they come as a package deal.
Have you met his kids at all? If they are little that’s different too than if they are teenagers or older.
hes what I’ve been looking for and I don’t wanna just give up. Was just curious on advice or experiences from others.
i met 2 of the kids in a public setting with others around, they are twins that are 6, boy and girl. The boy was asking him the day after if he could see me again cuz he likes me. Lol was cute. This was before we were in a relationship haven’t been around them since.
he has one more boy thats 3.
I think you can and will be number one in his life, but not until his kids are grown. Kids to grow up, pretty quickly in the scheme of things. Then it's your time.
I would hang in with him, based on what you're saying. Try to grow yourself. This is not for him, it's for you.
@elsa you make a great point. Although his kids are younger time does move fast. I do like kids as well though.
@leobra1221 the thing is, they only have to get to teenage and they are not going to want to hang around the old man. So if you really like him, there is no reason to toss in the towel at this point. Good men / good dads are not that easy to find. 
@elsa told me he’s never felt this way before. He’s been in long relationships before too.
said “madly in love” I love Scorpio’s intensity lol
my Leo self eats up the attention he showers me in…