The latter. A lifelong m.o., I've been told by those from his past. Wish I'd talked to them sooner, but part of the problem was that I was being isolated from them by him.
Don't beat yourself up. We aren't born knowing how to deal with crap like this. It's great that you are getting help.
It took me quite a while to realize I was being stalked. I was stalked by someone with Mars conjunct Pluto, miserable to deal with. People would get mad at me for trying to understand, think about it or talk about it. I really despise thought police. I called the person "unrelenting psychopath from hell" it's kinda funny that I called them that now that I have knowledge of astrology.
She also had a Pisces Moon
I had a similar experience with a crazy shit head who stalked me.
When I finally (after 6 months, I'd been totally paralyzed by this creep) went to the police & he was put in jail waiting for a trial, his family appeared out of the woodwork, thay all knew he was nuts...
But, how can you imagine all this when these psychos are good at playing a role? They are quite intelligent, in their sick way.
After all that I felt guilty. Guilty of not having expected, awned or predicted or whatever I should have done to avoid this.
I don't know what was transiting my chart at the time, but it must've been really fucked up, to put it mildly.
Courage to you Starcrest and good thing that you're in therapy.
Don't let this painful experience mar your life.
I’d appreciate insight from those who have experience with transforming and lifting up the energy of Mars/Pluto and Moon/Neptune, as well as dealing with relationships/friendships with borderlines.
A year and a half ago, I left a situation I'd been in for months with a man exhibiting borderline behaviors. It's probably one of the worst experiences I've ever had and I'm still healing.
As far as transforming/lifting up Mars/Pluto, Moon/Neptune energies, that's his work to do. If those energies have stuck to you, being in therapy and working with a good energy healer will do wonders.
How I finally dealt with my situation was to end all contact. I've used my time to understand what happened, to learn more about astrology (particularly venus/pluto aspects, fixed signs, and other indicators of this personality in the natal chart). I delved more into my natal chart and the synastry between us. I worked to understand what was getting triggered in me, addressing these themes, and looking at my own behavior towards him. And I've processed emotions endlessly.
Your description of your friend's endearing qualities could have been written about the man in my situation. It's these qualities that made ending the relationship so difficult but I needed to make myself priority, which was perhaps, one of the lessons he was in my life to teach me.
His Neptune and North Node and my Venus all conjunct in Scorpio. His Venus and my Jupiter conjunct in Aries. His Jupiter and my Sun conjunct in Libra. ...
His Pluto at 29 degree 48 Leo in my 2nd house of self esteem.
Each moment a lesson now in release. Given my Cancer Ascendant & 4th house sun, prying open the claws ? and maintaining an open grasp is the most difficult and rewarding activity of my life. Although I think the best experience, being mother to my son has been eclipsed by this relationship and it’s fall out...also by other relationships ... not seen by mother who was not seen by her due preoccupation with dissatisfying partnership.
Good news late Capricorn DC with Aquarian emphasis 7th and 8th houses.
Starcrest, wishing you every happiness in your newfound next chapter in your life. Really, very much so.