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The Silent Treatment

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Posts: 4
(@ariesgal)
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Joined: 14 years ago

I feel that people who have cap in their charts prominently can do this. I think the cap vibration suggests that they've grown up in a restrictive environment or that saturn has such influence on them. It could be that they don't feel like they have the right to fight or have a different weapon to express their anger and frustration with. My ex does this alll the time. We are still friends and he still does this. It's very distressing but now I care way less than I used to before. I treat it as a learning experience. I'm still in my 20s and not married so it doesn't distress me much. He has issues I suppose. We both do (he has more)

My ex ex ex also a cap did this too. I was in my teens then and me - aries would just blow it out of proportion, coz I'd never experienced that before. I think he knows better than to mess with fire now.

The earth signs and scorpio maybe don't understand how devastating it is to the more talkative and outgoing signs. I'll have people blow up at me and say things anyday because that means I know where they are at and that gives me a clue to solve the misunderstanding or at least get the idea if it's 'irreconcilable differences'.

((Opal)) nobody should have to go through that with a spouse, and in their own home. Especially while having a baby.

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(@ariesgal)
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Joined: 14 years ago

@Mina : I agree it's a privilage to share a good relationship with your dad and not a 'given' that should be expected. The thing that is disturbing about this is that a baby can't possibly be expected to understand this. unfortunately it doesn't mean it's not the way of the world.

I think we all have soul karma that we are born with. Me - I'm a aries born to a Capricorn dad. He's the best in some ways. He'll push because he sees potential in me and he provides without ever questioning if he even really needs to do so much. I have had opportunities that many others haven't and in someways has tipped in my chances for success and I'm eternally thankful for this. Yet the cap aries relationship is such that at times we can just do not see eye to eye. He holds me back and is extremely critical and fearful and that is very hurtful. I am impulsive and brash and don't think two steps ahead (coz I'm younger than him duh) an i don't give too much importance to rules and discipline and that hurts him no end. He thinks it's ethically wrong for me to flaut the rules and it's embarrassing that i stand up for things and people even if it causes people to think i'm a mischief maker(coz he never does that until he's figured out a strategy and is sure the establishment, whatever that it is, is really at fault)

Anyway all this is soul karma - it can't be helped.

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(@ariesgal)
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Joined: 14 years ago

Oh what I was trying to get at - is that my father sometimes doesn't think I'm very smart - so he thinks it's pointless to talk to me further about things. Or that's what I figured when I was much younger - My mother though was a very smart woman and encouraged me to keep asking questions even if I got 'the silent treatment'

It's hard to do it in a relationship - one would just come off as 'that crazy chick who doesn't get a hint'

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 Mina
(@mina)
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Joined: 15 years ago

@ariesgal--I understand what you mean, and I'm glad you have a good relationship with your Capricorn Dad. : )

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 Opal
(@opal)
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Joined: 16 years ago

@ariesgal

I think that observation about Saturn is spot on. And when Scorpio is involved it amplifies things. Cap/Scorpio often needs to give themselves permission to express their feelings, or this kind of behaviour gets out of control.

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(@maureen)
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Joined: 16 years ago

I always know when someone is punishing me with their silence. It makes me rage, and hurts my heart.

On the other hand, I also know when someone is preserving something essential and good, by risking their silence (it's always a risk for me, I love to talk). This can also make my heart hurt...minus the rage.

I generally try to avoid people who do the latter, and almost hardly ever do it any more myself, thank God. One of the hard-fought benefits of growing older and wiser.

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