The Shadow Side Of Aquarius

Aquarius man vintageHeather writes on Astrology Today:

“I’d like to hear more about the shadow side of Aquarius–particularly if other astrologers don’t talk about it. I am a Aquarius, and I know a good handful more (in whom I can see the shadow–but thanks to a 7th house sun, I can only see myself via another…or so I’ve found. Show me my shadow?”

Yes, this has long been a bone I have to pick. Keep in mind I am a home-schooled astrologer. I never talked to another astrologer (besides my sister) until I was in my late 20’s and moved to the city.

When I got there it was the first time I was able to compare my thoughts to theirs, where “theirs” means the collective and what I found by and large was worship when it came to Uranus. Astrology is ruled by Uranus, the group was ruled by Uranus, Uranus is weird, wonderful, quirky, humanitarian and blah, blah, blah.

I keep my mouth shut at these meetings and conferences always because of the attention factor but what I was thinking at the time was how about the KKK? That’s a humanitarian group! How about NAMBLA? Progressive enough for you?

My thoughts begin and run along these lines. Both those groups are individuals, promoting social chance and liberate humanity you know.

51 thoughts on “The Shadow Side Of Aquarius”

  1. Aquarius’s bad side is:

    Sexually freaky
    Weird (in a bad way)
    Mentally insane
    Cold and unfeeling
    Overly Rebellious
    Always needs drama
    Always goes against everyone because of their arrogance.

    Anything else?

  2. I find them very controlling. Or when someone has a mercury/uranus opp with merc in aqu or aries! I seem to have trouble with that combination: aquarius/aries folks with hard natal aspects.
    But of course this is just my experience. I am a cancer sun with three planets in the 11th and an unaspected uranus

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    I’ve had a few aquarians in my life and have, in general, gotten on well with them. There is, however, one that stands out in my mind.

    He used to be part of a larger group of friends that I spent much time with. Over the course of years we came to have an odd but interesting friendship – he dated three of my girlfriends over time. But he lied to me. A large-ish lie. One that damaged our friendship and one of my other friendships. I called him on his lying (darned taurean memory quoted him pretty much perfectly) At the time I confronted him he turned bright red in the face, admitted to lying, and then proceeded to tell me how stupid I was for believing his lie (which I hadn’t – it just took me a week to gather evidence as it were).

    That just blew my mind. You can lie to me but you blame me for the damage because ….

    All I can say is WOW. Years later all I know if him is that he keeps tenuous contact with one of the ex-girlfriends in my group of friends and from time to time I hear that he’s still alive. Which somehow surprises me.

  4. I get along well with Aquarius, especially Aquarius Moon.

    I like all the “lousy” Moons, must be because I have one myself. 😉


  5. My sister is a double Leo with aqua moon. We do better now but were not close growing up. I found her self centered/cold/detatched and she found me… I don’t even know. Probably too emotional 🙂
    Her north node is cancer, not surprising to me.

    I like aqua moon in guys a bit better–

  6. Ha ha, I have Aquarius Moon, and I am lousy, ha ha

    Toni’s list is about right, lol. We are interesting though.

  7. I’ve noticed that sometimes aquarius focuses on the humanitarian, progressive etc… but detatches from or can’t see the humanity of the individual.

  8. I have noticed the same as kvk101….the aquarians I know seem to focus more on a global realm, but have a difficult time with one on one relatiionships….I have had a number of Aquarian friends, in fact, one of my best friends is 5 planet Aquarian, Sun, Moon, Asc, Merc, ?, she is as cool as a cucumber and the one I seek when I need advice because she gives it to me plain, simple, to the point, detached, straight shooter…..I love that about her!

    The downside is that she is so detached…..she rarely tells me when things are bothering her and when she does it is in a very detached way that I am left wondering if it was her we were talking about. She can appear arrogant, but I think it is more of a shyness or insecurity. I have noticed and I think it is odd given that she is an aquarian, that she tends to stay “on the fence” on alot of things…meaning, she is not one that I would call if I needed anybody to stand up for me. She is not a fighter or assertive when it comes to basic things.

    I have noticed that I attract Aquarian men….must be my Leo Rising, and I think they are sweet, but the ones I have met seem kind of goofy.

  9. funny thing about aquarius, I can’t really pin them down. Everyone one of them is different. yeah, some are cold and detached, some are just hiding it well. My mom is aquarius and she is very emotional,warm and loving, but she has pisces moon, in fact she has stellium in pisces. I, on the other hand, act like a true aquarian. Detached, sensitive to the world issues, not so much for the individual, got my little quirkiness, and I’m triple water. But thats my Uranus asc, and Venus and Merc aquarius.

    I either like them very much and get them from the start, cause of their direct approach and extravagances. or I dislike them completely if they are too controlling and self-important. I can’t be indifferent.

  10. My Mom and my oldest friend in the world are aquarians. My mom is bipolar. I think I read that aqua’s are more apt to be mentally unbalanced than any other sign? Don’t quote me on that though. I don’t want all the aquas on the board screaming at me. Odd thing is she is ALL air and fire. I mean how can you not be stir fried? Thank god her daughter turned out to be uber earth huh. I am such a downer for her wild fancies.

  11. HAHAHA and that list is of BAD things???? I have an Aquarius Moon, but it goes well with my husbands Aquarius Mars.

  12. my dad is aquarius and was a psychiatric nurse all his working life pretty much. Ancient astrology books say these folk have an affinity with the insane by the way . He was adored by his patients but felt I believe anyway, stifled by the intimacy of family life and the emotional demands of a wife and five children so our life wasn’t traditional or cosy . He was so strong willed and yes detached but he expected academic excellence and he was fierce with my sisters and brother, very much so. I was a quick learner but we were all scared of his anger. Uranus after all was an utter despot remember! I’m writing this because at 83 he is now our inspiration. He’s connected and encouraging and like so many Aquarians, gives superb advice. He’s my hero now and he’s loving and still so adventurous, travelling around the art galleries of Europe. Always way ahead with technology, loves life and is proud of his family despite the early years. I notice often that Aquarian women seem to struggle with that strong masculine drive either within or without, especially in the work arena , but they’re also great friends for life.

  13. LOL @ the list, sexually freaky isn’t such a bad thing LOL

    I feel very deeply and so do some of my best friends who also happen to be Aquarians, the thing is, I think that a lot of time we may appear unemotional because we give more importance to reason and logic and ideals, etc etc etc. I have plenty of emotions but I KNOW that emotions are many times irrational, so knowing that, why let them control me/my life?

    With the arrogance thing, I really think this is a misconception, too. Like with me, I think that people mistake my not giving a fuck what anyone else thinks about me and my zero desire to try and impress anyone for arrogance when it is just that the idea of doing those things is just utterly unproductive to me.

  14. I tend to attract Aquarius b/c of my Aquarius rising…I don’t know why, but I never get along w/female Aquarius, but get along extremely well w/male ones. (Same thing goes for Libras, btw.) In fact, have had relationships w/3 Aquarian men w/Moon in Cancer (talk about a combination! lol).

    Had to laugh at that list above b/c I’ve BTDT w/all of them at some point in my own life…LOL!!

  15. the most harmful side of the shadow of Aquarius is being attached to their way of thinking, needing to be right at all cost, and identifying so powerfully with the need to be unique and different, at the cost of isolating themselves and deteriorating their physical health, they would rather die than change. And yes I have seen Aquarians chosing death over changing their lifestyle more than once.

  16. With saturn/jupiter in Aquarius, I have had love/hate relationships with several Aquarians. I loved their detached analysis of things, but had trouble when they embraced purposefully contrary ideas/beliefs because they wanted to be different and go against the grain.

  17. it’s weird, but peer pressure really seems to be a hugely aquarian thing. freakishly rigid social norms. the more “liberated” or “cool” or special” a group seems to think they are, the more likely they are to have weird cliquish unwritten rules.. the nasty cliquly teenage drama queens think they’re special… and it’s the same thing as leo except leo gives energy rather than cutting themselves off from everybody else the way aquarius does.

    and yeah. aryan nation thinks they’re on a racial holy war to free themselves of the “wrong people”. very aquarian. just like the depts of nasty the bush haters went… (ok, for note, i couldn’t stand the guy, either, but, really a lot of people went waaay beyond common sense and compassion with it.)

    and, i think, that’s the thing- there’s no inherent compassion in uranus. or aquarius. thus neptune/pisces comes next…

    oh, gah, i feel sick now.

    disclaimer: aquarius moon. trine pluto. with an extremely loose saturn opposition in leo. everything said above is pure perception/opinion.

  18. I love the Aquarians (Uranus rising/Juno in Aqua), but I’m aware they’re not good for me. And it stinks, because they are such fun to be around. On the other hand, they do tend to drift out of your life, and god help you if you’re in love with one because they won’t feel it for you in the same way at all, magically get over you one day and then want to be friends, and they like that better. I admire the attitude, but that can only be pulled off if you don’t have too many feelings, and they usually don’t.

  19. …add “socially awkward” to the list. I can think of quite a few things I have said to break the ice that have made people literally walk away from me or instantly hate me. This is mainly other women though, I tend to rub them the wrong way. It must be the masculine energy. I am trying to work on this though!

    I can be a little out there in group settings, as I have Sag. Neptune in the 11th house, but I have a good heart.

    I am a Sun Leo/Aquarius rising/Moon Libra and I can also be extraordinarily arrogant at times – it is a trait all of these signs share. Again, with the masculine energy. I am also quite the rabble-rouser in the workplace (MC Scorpio conjunct Uranus). It is never about people and gossip because I don’t talk to many people where I work anyway (there is another thing, I am too cool and aloof). It is usually about outdated or unfair policy and I have had to write several letters to “corporate headquarters” to get things done. I have learned that people don’t like that,
    even people who agree with your point of view and would benefit. I say that I am the “quality control” expert at all of my jobs (Saturn in Virgo).

    I don’t know, people have strong feelings about me – you either love me to pieces or you hate my guts. There is never anything in between.

  20. Im a double scorpio with a moon in aquarius, i dont fully understand the power of the moon, but i often feel a constant inner tension between detachment and desire

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    I’m an aquarius moon, with leo rising. I don’t know if a lot of that really describes me though. People always say we’re soooo detached. I guess I can be detached, or at least appear to be detached, but if I’m close to you…I’m not detached, trust me. I may be able to hide it to a certain degree (only to a certain degree though, I do have that damn pluto square venus/mars that tends to bite me in the ass).

  22. All I can say is this Aquarius detachment thing really gets to me — it leaves me baffled! Maybe cause I have an Aquarius moon — and so do both of my siblings…it seems the norm, lol.

    But when it comes to emotions and me – from an internal perspective – it’s not that I don’t have them, it’s often that I feel I shouldn’t have them or don’t know what I should do with them.

    I have a real good friend with an Aqua moon too and she’s a counselor. Incredibly clinical about feelings, she’ll say, “Well of course you would feel depressed, because of XYZ…” It always sounds like she is saying “Well of course your leg hurts, you broke it in a fall down the steps”.

    It seems rather healthy and I know she’s been in situations before where emotionally she was getting just ripped apart but also made very mature decisions to avoid that.

    So maybe there are two approaches (or more) the Aqua moon can take, but they are less personally integrated than say…a Cancer might be.

    I don’t know…I just can’t see the detachment angle — but maybe I’m just too emotionally removed, lol.

    Also, I’ve seen someone else somewhere on the internet holding up Christian Bale’s Batman as a perfect example of Aquarius…interesting.

  23. On this site, I read a fabulous list of things you will never hear a blank say. (Fill in the sun sign.) Some of them seemed so totally right on. I did notice there were relatively few for Aquarius — my sun sign. I think one of the few things I would say about Aquarians is that they are maybe the least predictable sign (so predictable, right?). I have a ton of them as relatives and wow… we all seem so unrelated! One common thread among us is the ability to appear detached, neutral and quite sane, but at other times I certainly can be an emotional wreck (Leo rising drama?) and/or borderline insane or genius. (Libra moon undecided?) I rarely am too attracted to them as close friends or lovers, though right now I got one with Aquarius moon, but only because thank god he has lots of Scorpio to counter-balance the detached thing (maybe my Venus in Pisces, needs some water, Libra needs balance).

  24. I’m an Aquarian born in 1990-02-12
    11.45 AM I think.

    So which moons things am I? xD

    In the Chinese horoscope I think I am a Metal Horse. I like the idea xD

    I wanna know a little more in depth about my signs

    Thanks ppl!

    Maybe I’ll discuss more about me. I really know my downsides etc, as I apply much the Temet Nosce (Know Thyself) motto throughout my life.

    Kisses & Hugs

  25. bad side..trouble makers, s*it stirrers, impulsive, self-rebellion, arrogance “above” what they perceive as “human stupidity”, the ability to SOUND like they know what they are talking about but they are BS’ing their way through it. emotional detachment. bolting quickly from relationships and anything. Fighting for a perception of freedom that is self serving and deluded (ie: KKK)

    Uranus is like everything else. Beneficial and malefic. I like the beneficial uranus but have certainly fell prey to the shadow. Not afraid of it. But awareness definitely makes me less apt to portray it. And side note, Uranians are rarely wrong..even when they are.

    1. Wonderfully put. Not to mention, the disgusting air of superiority these women seem to share with Scorpio women. Just gross how the world is theirs and everyone else is stupid and just doesn’t “get them” get over yourself already.

    2. Yes, they claim to hate drama but some of them sure do stir a lot of it up. They remind me of gnats swarming around stinky poo. Not dangerous, but annoying and slightly disturbing…as disturbing as a shit swarming gnat can be.

  26. Which moons are supposed to be “lousy?”

    Eh, my dad was an Aquarian Moon, I think I prefer that over my mom’s Pisces any day.

    Most Aquarians I know tend to be cheerful wacky detached yet friendly hippies. Except my aunt, who is definitely a “Saturnian Aquarius.” NO fun, very little sense of humor, very cold, very pragmatic. Compared to my other aunt she’s practically sunshine and roses (or at least most of the time the Aquarian isn’t nasty), but it took me awhile to realize how not-particularly-nice she is. I just called her the “nice” aunt by comparison!

  27. My daughter is an Aquarius, and I’ve got an Aquarius rising sign.

    My experience is that they deeper than they look, and get most credit for being quirky, when they want credit for being deep. This can make them angry.

    In addition, I find that they tend to rebel even against their own first impression. For an easy example, my daughter will tell me the first two bites of something that she LOVES IT SO MUCH OH SO GOOD, then suddenly it’s gag worthy and she hates it. And she’ll never sway from that impression again. It’s the second impression that sticks, and it’s almost always diametrically opposed to the first impression.

  28. I’ve got the Aqua moon going on…

    I’m definitely emotionally detached but it doesn’t mean I don’t have them… in fact I have LOTS of feelings, I just process them in a weird way. When I process them in an unhealthy way and they eventually boil over, my shadow side emerges and tends to consume everything. My warm friendliness turns into a cold, leave me the #*%@ alone depression, or my calm, fair, objective, sympathetic emotional reactions turn cold and surprisingly judgmental for the non judgmental Aquarius. Rather than letting myself be sad or hurt, I blow up my ego like a big balloon and convince myself I’m too strong to let any little people hurt me.

    It’s a terrible way to get and I can be really hurtful when I get that way. Thankfully it usually doesn’t last long, but the damage that gets done is usually pretty significant.

    I’m working on the healthy emotions thing… =\

  29. Oh, whoever said above about them blaming you for their own lying or the damage it caused? Yes! Mercury opposed Uranus, Earth Sun/Moon also widely opposing that Uranus (I had the Sun/Uranus opposition myself). He lied to me several times, only to deny it even when I had proof – and then another time, asked me why I put up with it (I hadn’t! and I countered that with that he shouldn’t be dishing it out. I wish I could remember exactly what he said.)

    He kept going on and on about rebelling, and going ‘crazy’ – breaking out of the social mold, blah, blah, blah (which I listened to patiently, because I’ve been through my own vocal and impulsive times when I believed in something), but he didn’t want anyone to be crazy or act out of line where he was concerned. He could just do whatever he wanted to, but others were supposed to treat him well.

  30. I avoid Aquarius men at all costs…Sun and moon…too many bad experiences/relationships years ago. My Aqu. is 10 the houuse Saturn

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    Aquarius men flock to me, because of my outspoken Aries Sun, maternal Cancer rising, reserved Cap Moon, and loving Venus in Pisces. However, they can be VERY difficult to date and surprisingly, very controlling. I love the creativity of Aquas, but too much of their wackiness gives me a headache.

  32. I find the Aquarius women are very dingy an very jealous but they don’t come our an show it you have to gradually watch. They can be conniving behind your back when it comes to a man but they wont show that either.

  33. I’m an Aqua sun. Sometimes I will reject things just BECAUSE they are so popular and mainstream, which is just as bad and prejudice as anything. I never felt like all the cookie-cutter descriptions I read, though. I’m not a revolutionary, trendsetting, take it up for the cause kind of person. I used to sound like a little know-it-all when I was a kid, but just because it sounded to me like people needed answers. I might seem too detatched for some but that might be my Venus in Cap. I have lots of emotion inside.

    One thing is absolutely true and people need to accept this if they want any relationship with me: I WILL change and do a 180 at any moment. Even I won’t know when it’s coming. For example, I DO NOT ever want to parachute from an airplane. I could be happy with my life never having done this. Today. Tomorrow I could wake up and suddenly that is my fixation. It is a little scary but, I accept that I have and always will be this way. It’s an Aquarius thing, I guess. Uranus is at 14° in my first house, too.

  34. Hello Everyone…

    After reading all the comments, 98% of what was said is true. I was born 02/16/87.. & I tend to be very romantic with women, I find a place in their hearts and for some odd reason i back away from them. Exclude myself from everyone a lot randomly for no reason. Women say they love to talk to me, that im fun, understanding, and caring. But they seem to clutter my space and I hate that. So I’ll give them the silent treatment bc of that. I’m easily bothered. Don’t get me wrong, i love people and care about their feelings. When I was in relationships I was in long term ones. When I’m in love with a woman, I’m in LOVE. I’ll do anything and everything for her. I might be a bit of controlling but only with good intentions. As soon as she does something I don’t like, that makes me feel a sense of betrayal or think she is being unloyal. I can cut her off in a split of a secound. Even if we’ve been together for 5 years. It’s a sickness being a Aquarius when it comes to relationships. Other then that, I make new friends easy to replace my old friends. People love to be around me. In my head I think, they better enjoy my company bc I won’t be around long. I will go Mia on them quickly. Sorry I’m this way.

    1. In short words, many sun/ moon/ venus in aquarius are very proud people ( and leo receives bad reputation for being proud ) and childish, everything has to be their way.
      They can fool most of people around them…but not me.I realize that when I was around 12 years old watching an aquarian girl at my class. She many times tried to make me one of her “friends” ( = doormats )… and recently a venus aquarius guy is trying to behave the same way with me after I said I liked him. If I knew he has venus in aquarius, I would have dumped him immediately, but better later than never.

  35. loved your thought-lines.
    I’m an aquarius too and I am faaaaaaaar too detailed in my thinking in order to waste much time replying with emotional-based candy-coated behaviors of most human beings lol.
    I’m frontal, but not as much as sometimes I would like to be, due to sensibility issues most people have due to being overly attached to what most people do, calling it democracy and actually, belonging to the sheep herd more than to their own selves.
    Makes me wanna intelectually vomit lol.
    But, all in all I’m a happy person, just have a less enthusiastic sense of happiness, and a more mentally stable one, I would recon.

  36. I have sun in aquarius mercury in aqua both in the 3rd house scorpio ac and my moon is in capicorn Jupiter in piecies house 4 it seems I always wanna find truth and peace for all but I get enemies for it and my relationships don’t last because of it females say I don’t show emotions I do I believe just not in the way they expect

  37. I have Aquarius rising, but with all of Pisces in the first house, with moon in Pisces, and a good chunk of Aries in the frst house. But I have a Leo sun. I have learned to leave people alone in order to avoid trying to impose my way of thinking on them and my need to be the center of attention. With Aquarius rising and a Pisces moon I am quite happy to be alone most of the time. When I do socialize people seem to like me, but to me they like a superficial version of me. I don’t reject that, just not take it seriously. I do champion the underdog but not with negative passion, and I will go out of the way to help someone who is suffering. But that does not mean I want to be friends. I am creative, and a partner with someone in a new business. This person seems to be attached to me. He also has found that my instincts are right about business, branding, etc(proven when tested). I have no idea why he is attached to me, although the attachment is weird since it seems to take place almost entirely on the phone (I hate phone calls but most of his are OK because they’re about business developments). I was a very effective teacher at one time but would dread playing that role again. I have always been indifferent to my siblings and when I have been close to people I felt no regret in moving away and not keeping in touch. Retirement, and its indulgence of leisure, eccentricity, and cultural interests suits me just fine. But one thing is enduringly positive about me: I am always considered to be fair.

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