Why Is Everyone So Messed Up?

psychopathy signPsychologists know that abuse changes a person’s brain. Let’s say you were raised by a psychopath or just an insane parent of any stripe. Some deviation from normal would be evident to a person trained to get at these things.

I’m a product of severe abuse. Over the last couple of years, I realized I would rather have endured what I did growing up, then have to deal with what kids are put through today. I don’t know if people understand me or believe me, but I do feel this way and I’ve come to better understanding of why.

If a person is negatively affected when the people who have authority over them mistreat them, lie to them and such, then this would hold true regardless of who the authority is. So what about our crazy leaders, round the world, put in place at every level?

One advantage I had,  I was never mistreated outside my family. On the contrary, I caught wild support most everywhere I went. As bad as it was, most of the world was “safe”. Now look what we have today. You have a perfect child, a newborn, and look what we, as a collective, do to him or her.  It’s despicable.

Slews of vaccines, park ’em in front of a screen, feed them junk, expose them to sex, nearly from the day they’re born. Be sure to sexualize them, tell them lies, constantly. We collectively teach them their parents are idiots and they are geniuses. I’ve got news for you – this is severe abuse.

We make sure they never feel safe with anyone, anywhere, and we want them to know, the sky is going to fall, on a daily basis. On top of that, lots of people hate them for any number of reasons, that can’t be altered.

They’re powerless!  All of life is an unsolvable puzzle.  Ooh, sounds like a great, fun childhood – not!

Your parent does not have to be your abuser. These psychopathic politicians and others, ruling over your children are harming them and here’s the kicker – they don’t know it. So what’s that mean? Abuse has been normalized.

I knew my circumstance was abnormal and I sought help when it became clear I needed it. A kid growing up today has no earthly idea he or she has been hijacked. How would they know? They’re all in the same boat. I don’t see them seeking help. Even if they do, will they be able to find it? I doubt it.

My doubt stems from looking at the baby-boomers, today. Medical care is hard to come by, due to the sheer number of people needing it, among other things.

I’m sorry this is dark but it’s clearly real. If you’re a parent or if you plan to be, you may want to think about how you are going to protect your children from this type of destruction.

Note – pulling this up because I just read that young children have suffered a 23% loss of development due to the pandemic.  How are these kids supposed to make this up? Maybe it can be done, if you drop what you’re doing and focus on helping them recover.

40 thoughts on “Why Is Everyone So Messed Up?”

  1. I worked with a 20 yr. old server in a restaurant a few months ago.
    She was very sharp, very intelligent and very diligent. I noticed
    this right away, and complimented her for how helpful and on top of things she was. She was a saver, she scrimped and saved. She mentioned that she used her stimulus checks to pay her tuition for our local community college, and she said that she paid whatever she could out of pocket.

    She had JUST been accepted into the associate degree nursing program at our local Jr. college, just started it. She told me that she “only owed 6 thousand dollars in student loan debt”. My head spun around. I asked her why so much? She told me that here in Texas, they stack a ton of prerequisites, mostly crap about state history revolving around how we were considered a republic, almost like a separate nation. Our lawmakers heap all this mandatory required state history and such for people who want to go to nursing school. She told me that she lived at home with her mom, to save more money and that she only took student loans as a last resort.

    My question is, why are we saddling an otherwise extremely astute and most capable nursing student who is only 20 yrs. old, with so much debt?
    What is going to happen when she goes to work and is paid the bare minimum because our state is a right to work state, famous for it’s shockingly low pay compared to other places? What if she wants to have children one day? That debt is compounded interest. Student loan debt is now considered by government to be a priority debt, meaning collection efforts include going by your income and not having to consider your housing costs. Even the IRS has to consider your housing costs when demanding payment. Anyway, the whole damn thing makes me so angry. Her mother is a radiologist, not like they are a couple of trouble makers.

    I guess what really makes me angry is that my son graduated on a full ride scholarship, he has friends who are in Masters and PhD. programs paid for by the university. Colleges are more than able to provide less expensive alternatives to education. If they truly cared about the future and their communities, they would not put up such financial roadblocks to educating the truly deserving who will use their education to benefit society as a whole.

      1. When I went to nursing school in community colleg ein the 80’s, we took all our courses concurrently.No “prerequiste years” with big bills. For $3500 I graduated with an ADN/RN and got a great job right out of school.No debt. My instructors were all graduates of the HOSPITAL BASED TRAININGS that were the norm before universities took over nursing ed. I think we should go back to hospital based training!! The ed. system is about making $$ now. Sad.

    1. Knowing history and Civics and Government is vitally important. So is an education in knowing how the Law works. Because in law school you learn that “Ignorance of the law is no excuse for your behavior, criminal or otherwise.” Better that people go into the world with some knowledge of how to live in it. And some knowledge of how it has worked, good and bad, for centuries.
      Of course, these were all topics that were once taught in high school.

    2. My understanding is that state funding to universities and colleges was cut years ago. Also many colleges feel they must invest in sports teams and more luxurious dorms to “keep up” with other colleges. Both add to the cost of college. I would like to see more public investment in colleges and in trade schools since there seems to be a shortage of skilled and semi skilled trades. Some of these trades were taught in high schools. It was called “shop” and covered things like carpentry and auto repair. That funding was cut also.

    3. I so agree. We are stifling our young people from achieving their highest goals. We need more financial support for 2 year degrees, that can support our need for services. I would have loved to have gone to college but I knew the financial support was not there. So much more I could have offered to society.

  2. Another comment, this topic interests me greatly.
    I think it is a snowball effect that has been a long time coming.
    In 2012-2013, my son attended public high school at our local district.
    The suburb we lived in has much higher property taxes then the rest of the surrounding community. Our suburb did not have a community college, the nearest community college was located 9.8 miles away in the local surrounding community. My son was enrolled in a program where he was allowed to take classes at the community college that were dual credit, both high school and college credit.

    Since our property taxes did not fund the surrounding community college district that was 9.8 miles away, this community college required us from this nearby public school to pay out of state tuition. It was Catch 22, if you wanted to get the dual credit, you had to go to that community college located 9.8 miles away and pay the out of state tuition to do so.

    I remember forking over as much as a thousand dollars cash. It was insane. I did it because it really helped my son, he ended up receiving an invitation only, privately funded scholarship that only paid for state colleges. My son graduated and has no student loan debt. He was a Liberal Arts major who became fluent in another language. He was not a scientific major, but his major was considered important enough by the committee that they invested in him. I know they can do so for others. There are so many potential students out there capable of achieving so much. Community college is now as expensive as regular college. Why?

  3. Sorry, one last comment and I will stop. I just remembered this.
    The reason why I was so livid upon hearing my 20 yr. old coworker
    server already owing 6K in student loans just to attend community
    college, enrolled in an associates degree only program is this:
    My dad’s wife was born in 1942, she told me back in the 1970’s
    about how she was allowed to get her tuition paid for at our
    local community college so that she could get her nursing
    associates degree, just as my coworker is doing. Same degree,
    same community college program. The difference is, tuition was
    cheaper in the early 1970’s, and the state thought it was a
    good return investment to pay the tuition so they had another
    employed nurse to staff the hospital. State viewed it as a
    win win situation, cost wise. In my dad’s wife’s case, she
    did not work as a nurse for 20 plus years, she only worked
    a few years before she met my dad at the hospital, married
    him and became a housewife for the rest of her life. This
    same woman, nowadays would be the sort of person who would
    condemn my coworker for expecting a generous tip for service.
    After all, it is not my dad’s wife’s fault this server is
    working at a restaurant. She also would be the first to
    condemn this server for taking out student loans. In her
    day, she was able to go for free, so everyone else can too.
    Not her issue if the server cannot get a full ride scholarship
    like my son was granted. That scholarship my son received
    was almost as rare as hitting the lottery, it was definitely
    a strong chance of not being selected during the process.

    I think this is why kids today are so messed up, why they
    feel hopeless and directionless. The odds are increasingly
    stacked against them.

    1. ew sorry to hear about your dad’s wife being so mean hearted and cold hearted. she got lucky to have what she had back then for sure. Its weird how some people dont give same compassion and care to others of younger generation. it’s like some of them become old grudgemeons. or harpies. >_<

      i hope your coworker gets a break! i heard that Biden is helping students with their student debt but i bet there's alot of nasty mean hearted people who are cruel and dont understand how difficult it is. And realize that in the old days it was much much easier. Thanks for sharing your story and how much easier it was back then.

      1. Um, first of all, my dad’s wife did not say any of that.
        What I wrote was putting words in her mouth. I actually
        used it as a metaphor example of how older people do not
        understand that the world today is much more difficult
        for young people growing up than it used to be. Many
        do not understand their plight.
        Secondly, I understand you do not live in the United States.
        Much different here, student loan debt is controlled by lobbyists.

        1. ahhh ok.^^ i really thought she did. so it read so awful if she did say that.
          so your dad’s wife didnt say any of that. but i get now your metaphor.

          i hope that biden’s student loan for millions of students pull through.

          thats sad about student loans. USA can be a great country if they helped out young people with their debt and help young people become productive talented individuals for the future of the world.

          many of these young people end up poor and paying until their senior years and never get to achieve their dreams. its so sad.

        2. ok i re-read it and you did say ” this same person would condemn ”
          so it seemed like she would be a nasty human being to think that. sorry. my confusion. >_<

  4. It’s not harsh it’s accurate. I live on tiny island we have less than 2500 children in school however they label 2000 of them special needs? which means they keep telling them from the very get-go how inferior how subpar how labeled they are they never take the label off because they’ve got their hand up the federal governments Wazoo ,50k per child, they hide this glut of money in Overpaid superintendence positions fantastic sports fields etc. ,so as long as they keep sending the money the label sticks here when you got the label the scheduling is ridiculous we have 950 teachers and assistance they ( the labeled)will miss gym recess art music snack and every birthday invitation handed out because they’re with a special teacher three times a day that takes them three hours out of their class they will never catch up we have ,it’s called ,the race to the top diagram now and play in our public schools ,where they continue to extract as many kids that they call on the spectrum ,so they can force feed this fantastic science math program The kids extracted will never catch up the ones on the top really understand they are the best and the rest are subpar so they divide our kids they learn alone !!and they wonder why they don’t even think they could hold a job serving coffee ,pumping gas? it’s a money mill
    I quit my job Friday as a teacher made four visits four days in a row to try to pick on me , why I couldn’t tell you ?and because I kept telling her to take it somewhere else! she decided to continue to pick on the students as example to my bad guidance !but I’m not Driver ,that’s it !I don’t discipline I don’t teach and I sure don’t continue the bullshit that she fed them for seven hours she put her hands on 2 five year olds who were hugging and said This is inappropriate !that’s the moment I quit the job, because I realize this bitch just wants to bother me ?and she will go to the extent of shaming guilting or hurting a little five years for hugging so I had a jump done . five year olds hugging is natural is beautiful full is why we want school .when they tell you can’t hug ?Yep that’s when I’m done. I have Applied for five jobs in the last three days I’ll see what tomorrow brings me being a Capricorn I’m a bit of a panic but I know one thing them five year olds do not deserve someone trying to use them to hurt me because you see I don’t really give a shit if she likes me she can’t hurt me so she decided to hurt them.
    Wouldn’t it be smarter if they just had one super science teacher for the super scientists ?and kept all the kids together to know they had buddies and a future in a great community?

    1. The schools get money for every special needs kid. It’s not a far stretch to belittle that that could be abused. Of course there are children with special needs but I don’t believe it’s to this great degree.

    2. Exactly, they brand children as special Ed because the schools receive triple per student. Then they let them fall through the cracks. It’s horrible.

    3. This is atrocious! Glad for you that you quit, but I’m sure the teacher will find another victim and continue to torture the children! Is there any way you can report her to supervisors or authorities?

  5. I shield and protect my son as much as possible and stay AWARE and PRESENT. While there’s well meaning people who work in “the system” (by that, I mean the whole fucking thing, all of it from schools to prisons to corporations- it’s all one thing) I know that ultimately it wants to absorb my child into it, one way or another.

    And I also know that as a single mother my son is especially vulnerable. Lots of social engineering has happened around the lack of fathers in the home. The government ultimately would like to replace mom and dad.

    The truly sad thing though is that people think that these thoughts and feelings they have are their own and so they add power to the current of manipulation and become little soldiers. It’s funny that most of the people who Ive met who see through it all are people who were in the military or prison and that’s because they’ve gone through the process of indoctrination or being institutionalized and can recognize it.

  6. Avatar
    Hildegarde's Noviciate

    As always, youre dead on Libra Noir
    Im also always gobsmacked that we dont ask the question that I personally feel is the very basic issue…which u…why the hell does a single year of college cost up to 50K a year. Has anyone actually broken down these numbers??
    Interestingly the sharp increase in price occurred during the 90s when so many high executives got laid off. They entered the educational and non profit industries and ran these institutions like a for profit. The results were both good as well as very bad
    How can, for example, a college justify paying a college sports coach 1.6 million a year? Build a multimillion dollar stadium and have any portoon of the student tuition be part of paying for it. They say to bring money in to fund other programs the school offers.
    I understand but how much of that money may be actually feeding the machine’s infrastructure and what signals are we sending out there?
    How many of these schools have Marketing and PR people that put a gloss on their brochures filled with misleading data about opportunities that arent or eventually results in an income that doesnt support the student.(quite a few colleges and universities got sued over this actually).

  7. I agree with the post. Another thing I’ve noticed for awhile is the way children are involved in some incident (tragedy or potential scare that is defined by media and those in power). There are no qualms about shoving a mic in front of a child on tv and asking them how they felt about the situation. This is absolute bullshit. I hate it with a passion.

  8. Thanks for putting into words and categorizing exactly what I’ve been feeling about the current youngers. I know they feel hopeless, lost and as if life is purposeless. You’ve laid it out, and this is entirely the truth. And yes, I like you was raised by sociopaths and my mother was schizophrenic and ran a cult. The only difference is I never had any outside support. From anyone.

  9. I can totally relate to your upbringing. In my era most of the children were born and on the planet one, two, three years before they ever saw their fathers. I was born at the early years of WWII. The dads came home from whatever branch of the service with PTSD then called Shell Shock so badly and no one knew what it was or why they were so “different”. Here this young men 17-18-to 22 were signing up, being sent to war destinations and thus had their girl friends, new wives got pregnant ( no birth control except condoms that I am sure were not very helpful back then) and come back to a 2 1/2 year old kid in their Mars return of being a bratty kid. No early years of bonding with the dad which is probably why there was such a rebellion of these kids in the 1960’s when they hit 18-22. Out of the people I know very few have not had a dysfunctional youth period.

    1. Avatar
      Patricia L Holmes

      I must be the same age. I have mulled over this issue for years. As I now am getting close to 80, I figured it out. BUT gosh oh dear…dysfunctional youth was a mis nommer. It was hell. And born to a mother who wished her condom had worked. No affection, just tolerance. Thanks for your post

  10. Hi Elsa, could you clarify please what astrological signifiers you think are going on to cause these problems that young people have today? thank you.

    1. It would be hard to do. First, “young people”. What age is that? Everyone alive at this time is affected. If you’re 40 and your kid falls in hole or fails to thrive or just heads off into tragedy, you are going to suffer. If you’re 75 and you see you children struggling with their children; you wonder what the hell your life was even for. So I am not isolating a group here.

      I am trying to talk to parents and grandparents who see their younger people they loved, glued to a screen watching their “I CONs”. They are watching creative people but they are not creating themselves.

      What is your sun? It’s your creative life force… if you’re watching people live on tv, is that life? How about the REAL whatever shows, where not a single person is who or what they say they are. I’m sorry, but age doesn’t matter. It’s just that when you’re talking about young children, they parents can intervene… potentially. I am trying to suggest that they should.

      In general, at this point in time, I would look at Pluto in Capricorn because the structure and the authority is rotten to the core (cracked foundation and now worse).

      I have been saying this since 2006.

      The people most admire are psychopaths and they don’t realize it. If you allow yourself to be influenced by a psychopath, you will be damaged. I will write about this, next.

      One more thing, when I was a kid, I did not know what a psychopath was. I wish someone would have intervened. I am trying to so this for others.

      I’ll also say, it’s very hard to do because people are so enamored with this type of person, and well trained to behave this way. This is why you want to get your kid out of this… or wish you would have, at some point down the road.

  11. Part of the reason I never had children was because I was terrified that I couldn’t do enough to protect them. I’m sorry to see that what seemed to be an anxious fear of mine turned onto such a widespread reality.

  12. Catching up on some older posts and came across this one. Yes, this. I am an eternal optimist (well,I was until 2020) but these truths are apparent.. I fear for the children of this world..the world they are in is startling ,frightening and false and dangerous.I would not know how to raise happy people in these times.. I would not know how to limit screen time,protect kids from over sexualization ,and from the influence of EVERYONE OUT THERE that has access to them so easily!! I used to belittle “helicopter” parents but now I think they just have to.. and I probably would,too, if I were in my child bearing years. I feel like a lost child myself, a lot of days, lately!! Resilience: VERY important.i read the resilient child post and I am one of those..I had all those traits and was able to thrive despite deep neglect on the part of my parents. Mars conjunct Sun and also Uranus very close by..I am uber creative, huge ability to make things happen and reach my goals, and a fiesty,quirky, Can-do attitude.. I always say i raised my SELF. But I did have a loving grandmother who helped.I left “home” at age 16 and never went back! Made my OWN family and bgot a good career ( a couple,actually..) I hope today’s parents can “get” that real world skills are the best shield they can give their kids..TEACH them some of those skills!! Protect them, but TEACH THEM. A very accurate book on how history repeats (and it jives perfectly with astrological cycles!) is “The Fourth Turning” and it goes through generational cycles that explains so much of where we are at right now..and where we have been..and what comes next..worth a good read. I am fearful of what this world is becoming right now. And i am not in general a fearful person. I am going to try to hold out hope that the principles of the Fourth turning are correct and a renewal will come after this storm.

  13. This is my daily life😭 Sometimes I wonder how the whole generation is going to end up. Like, who will my children have as friends, spouses, when they are all grown up? Will there be enough people who aren’t so severely messed up that they can all find each other and fix what was broken, so protect their own children? What will become of the ones who can’t overcome what’s been done to them? How will we function in that future?

  14. at the height of the roman empire rome had a population of 100,000 and had 8000 murders a year. can we imagine that ratio today? why is everyone so fragile?

  15. I so agree. We are stifling our young people from achieving their highest goals. We need more financial support for 2 year degrees, that can support our need for services. I would have loved to have gone to college but I knew the financial support was not there. So much more I could have offered to society.

  16. “One advantage I had, I was never mistreated outside my family. On the contrary, I caught wild support most everywhere I went.”
    Curious how would this be reflected in astrology, yours of you don’t mind sharing, or in general.

  17. As always, point of view is everything.. they way YOU spin it..

    I found that a cold and neglectful upbringing could have made me sad and bitter, but instead, I found light in the caregivers and relatives who came to fill in the gaps— the grandma, the teachers and mentors along the way, including finding my rosicrucian teacher/mentor/friend at age 18, who guided me into a spiritually based life. (with lots of mothering and wifey tips in there too..I got married at a very early age and my mentor was also a Mom and wife, in addition to a gifted metaphysician..)

    So,I learned to FOCUS on the helpers, like Mr Rogers said— ha ha! You can spend a lifetime picking at your wounds, or you can learn how to blend the best natural remedies ever, apply them to the wounds, and heal..

    My mostly good life has come about from shifting FOCUS and then looking at my STRENGTHS in my chart.. and going from there. And at times,I needed help to do that..

    There IS a lot of help out there, and I know some people can become paralyzed and cannot reach out..so, if you feel strong today,reach out to someone who does not, and try to help them find the helpers.. which can be people,counselors,pets,activities,spiritual practice,so many helpers and remedies available.. but sometimes our fellow humans need a leg up —so, be that when you can.

  18. In general I find that children carry the pathology of their times… pretty much as we all do, it’s just that we can more easily detect it to younger people. We probably carry our own, just as our parents carried theirs.

    It is sad to see though what the past few years have left the kids with, it’s a loud reminder that, even though adults can probably protect themselves more or ignore more successfully the impact covid years had on us collectively, the influence becomes more apparent with younger generations. For me, the most devastating effects have more to do with social and emotional evolution, the cognitive parts are easier to compensate for.. besides, the standard according to which these kids are ‘behind’ is manmade and relative..
    on the other side, we are seeing how hard it is for those kids to coexist without extreme tantrums or violent reactions, even now, after they have been reintroduced to normal school life for a couple of years. We are also hearing them express deeply cynical and depressing views about their futures, to the point where it makes one wonder whether they have the capacity to dream ahead and start off into their adulthood with positive expectations and courage, or if they are just wired to be good productive machine-like creatures, with no ideals or ethics other than that of blind competitiveness and material wealth.

    I know that sounds dark but I honestly found myself wondering exactly that this year. Add to that the lack of a sense of stable reality created the last years and yes, the situation looks really bleak. And true, humanity has been through harsher times and we should never underestimate our resilience and capacity to turn things around but it looks like we are entering (or have already entered) darker times than most recent decades.. what’s also scary is how all encompassing this feels.. the more connected the world is the more widespread the pathology I guess

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