Growing up, I never imagined myself married. Never had a bf in high school, unlike my little sister who had, like, bf's galore. Went to college. Same. Until I met a guy! I set a timeline for myself, that I wouldn't marry before x age. When I reached x age, we were still with each other, despite life moving us to different places, etc. We tied the knot. Huge traditional wedding. It was a quirk of fate. If not for a chance encounter, I would be a non-married, which would have been fine by me. Now we're married but we're the same people when we met. What about you? Married? Non-married? Thoughts?
Married but really interested what non-marrieds think.
As for what I think, I feel we're strongly influenced from birth and in this era, we're socialized to be anti-marriage.
I've never married, and been with my partner for nearly 23 years.
I've never wanted to be married, never saw it as being part of my future growing up. Both my parents were married before they married each other, and I think they married because I was on the way. I don't know, it just feels like being married would curtail me somehow, restrict me and though I'm ferociously committed and loyal, I don't like the idea of committing to someone in that way
Say your spouse were to leave you— half the money you earn during the marriage, and save, will go to them in divorce. That’s if you’re lucky. Some people have to pay alimony. This can get really unfair when there is a large difference in the spouses’ earnings. You’re basically tethered by money. Make sure you love the person.
yes exactly, my sister had to pay alimony because she was the breadwinner and made more money than her husband, who was mostly on commission and was stay at home dad.
Can all that be prevented by a pre-nuptual agreement? Seems like a good investment.
@warped well it can, but people don’t usually think about a prenup if they get married before they have money.
I am non-married, but I would like to be married someday. I'm actually neutral on having kids, weirdly. But marriage is a goal. I don't care which gender. I think it'd be a great way to formalize finding a relationship with the right person.
I feel like it’s one of those many modern institutions that I’m banned from entering. I’m not sure who’s banning me, wether it’s my own soul blueprint or society, or both. Probably both, it feels like an agreement of some sort. Like I made some kind of devotion to something that required that I remain a virgin (in the ACTUAL/HISTORICAL sense of the word. That’s a pretty esoteric response but that’s how I see it for me. I have a Haetera or a Vestal Virgin signature. Connections are important but it’s the connection that’s important (if that makes sense lol).
eta: If it’s not clear, I’ve never been married.