My husband and I have been married over 21 years. We have a lot of contacts with Lilith.

My (8th house) Lilith is conjunct his mercury (his mercury is in the 7th house conjunct his DC).

His Lilith is conjunct my Sun, Mercury, Mars, and Ascendant.

There has never been a moment in our relationship where either one of us has felt insecure with each other. We've never doubted that we were completely committed and faithful to one another. The obsessive qualities that can be read about as a sort of Lilith expression has been expressed in our relationship in that way I guess. From the moment we met each other until this day we are dedicated to one another. I really haven't given much thought to Lilith in our synastry because we have so many other aspects which represent the energies in our relationship.

I will say this though---from the moment we met we were completely entranced with one another and that hasn't let up in over 20 years.

Here is a funny story--if we are in the house and I get up and walk into another room he will almost immediately ask one of our children "where's your Mother". He knows when I am not in his immediate area. It's not smothering it's just a funny family joke.

......... lilith in a chart means what anyway?

Would you folks say the Lilith person is affected more, or the planet person? My Lilith is tightly conjunct his Venus/Mars conjunction in Aries (along with a whole host of other aspects, including sextiles to Mecury, Jupiter and the ascendant). I am pretty fixated on him sexually, but I don't know if he shares that with me. Of course, there is no way of knowing on your guys's part, but maybe someone has anecdotal ideas? What is your experience?

bump

having a thing with this girl I met at a bar, she's the hardest and quickest I ever fell for a girl by far. In fact I only learnt about Lilith and some of the other asteroids (Juno, Vesta etc.) because of her -- i wanted to find out why I was so damn obsessed with her. And I was and still am so obsessed that I have spent days on days reading astrology and analyzing our charts.

We do have some other obsessive/delusive aspects that could play a part though: her Sun conjunct my Neptune (0 deg), her Neptune square my Sun.

But the more I read about Lilith and the mythology, I feel our relationship is also highly influenced by our Lilith aspects.

My Mars is opposite her Lilith (1 deg). I was, and still am, crazilly attracted to her. I remember when I first saw her, I knew i wanted her in less than 30s. This is coming from a Venus in Libra who could take months deciding if he wanted to pursue a lady or not..

Our Liliths are also conjunct... 1 deg. Lilith conjunct Lilith. The whole story of Lilith is very identifiable to me, especially the concept of her running away and exercising her freedom in a somewhat rebellious way to make a point and demand equality. Because I've seen that literally, firsthand. There was once we disagreed where to go. She insisted on going to this particular bar and I didn't want to. We actually had a standoff in public (outside a convenience store :D) and I told her to just come with me and she refused. Then i walked off and she walked off too :(..

Her Lilith is also conjunct her Pluto and Chiron by about 3-4 degrees, so it could be those effects too, I'm not sure.

As for sex.. well I'm not sure if its appropriate so please do remove this portion if it offends.. The first time we went back together we were both in the shower, i was standing in a corner far from the corner she was standing in, just innocently soaping my arms and shoulders. With a direct look into my eyes and some come-hither action of her hands she motioned me over to wash her boobs. After I went over and did that, she grabbed my hand and placed it at her intimates and had me clean her there too. Needless to say, that lit my fire and since then I've been hooked on her.

I'd also add that the sex always happened on her terms. I always wanted to have sex with her 😀 but it only happened when she wanted it too. But when we did have it, she was always fully engaged and it was great. I read this about Lilith in mythology "She demanded that they either engage in these activities side by side or with her laying on top. " well it kind of resonates too, that one time she was on top, the next day I had difficulty walking because she had ground into my pelvic area so hard the night before..

hope this helps others with crazy Lilith relationships too

I think BM Lilith mostly symbolizes unavailable relationships/attractions. I know someone whose Eros is conjunct my Lilith by a few degrees and my Lilith is on their 8th house cusp exact. There is a  very good reason I looked it up. Massive  unavailability for both of us, but other people start sweating and look visually uncomfortable when both of us are in the same room. It's a hilarious thing to experience! ? Happened today when we were in the same elevator. People literally cannot look us in the eye! And this is when nothing even remotely inappropriate ever happens between us by looks, words or actions. It's just this weird energy that the whole world collectively experiences.

We also have Asteroid Lilith conjunct my Pluto, which leads to channeling of our joint manipulative and rebellious energies, I think. I think we would make a very good sniper team (Mars Conj Uranus in composite). We already are great for business for our company!