Antisocial…but not disordered

I get a true kick out of some people who are “antisocial”. But let me clarify this…

I remember when a person could be “antisocial”, and it was not considered a mental illness. A person might  be known not to like people all that much. No one cared.  These people were characters. They were loners to some degree. Maybe they just didn’t like to chit chat all that much.

No one thought they should be fixed or given drugs. No one thought that anything should be done to alter their natural personality or change the way they chose to express themselves in the world.  They were a cranky but important part of the landscape, because they kept things interesting.

Thankfully, I still meet people like this. With Uranus in the 7th house, I am not interested in the homogenized “individual”.

This is a shout out to all weirdos. I remember when the Borg was considered a bad thing!

28 thoughts on “Antisocial…but not disordered”

  1. I think it’s part of our culture commingle socialized. Everyone has to behave to a standard that’s not their own.

    I wrote this will a few people in mind. A couple people from the old man’s bar, where I worked as a kid.

    Those men were mostly WW2 vets. They were all distinguished in their own way, and each man was different from the next.

    Anyway, there was a cranky guy in there, he loved to play, “Mack the Knife”, on the jukebox, but refused to talk to anyone. I was advised when I first started working there, not to take it personal. I was told (with the man sitting right there), that he was anti-social.

    The man smiled, glad this was understood.

    Anyway, people were colorful and let’s face it. Not everyone is friendly. Not everyone is open. Not everyone is happy!

    But the idea they should be drugged into compliance…well, if anyone suggested this thirty years ago, people would have laughed, heartily.

    I do know some modern day rebels. Jaw-droppers.

    Also, this subject goes way back on this blog (search iconoclastic men) OR

    1. Avatar

      Thank you for this Elsa, for speaking your mind and for creating a space to communicate as ourselves in a comfortable way (for everyone). However awkward, weird, different, antisocial, “unprofessional” we may be.

      I’ve gotten so many lectures on how to be professional, as a young person, as soon as the recession hit, from every single one of these professional persons. And, I’ve listened and listened and listened, making comparisons of myself to them, as if they are the only models for strength in this uncertain world. But then, especially in this I realized to be a force for good, I also have to be myself. And that’s where true confidence can be built. Take what I can learn from them but realize that I have my own path.

  2. Thank you, thank you. My son, who is one of the most fascinating people I know is antisocial. He is a late Sag rising but still has five planets (Mercury, Uranus, Neptune, Saturn, Sun and his NN) in Capricorn and the 1st House. He can’t help himself. He is so busy observing life under a microscope it is very difficult to stop and have conversation. To top if off he is brilliant, IQ off the charts. But he is human. My greatest gift to my kids (and this is not a recommendation to anyone – it just worked for us) is that I waited until I was 38 to have him (my first). There was nothing else I wanted to do but be a mom. I had partied, careered and socialized to my hearts content. Reading picture books and visiting petting zoos was all I wanted to do. He is a well adjusted antisocial young man. Looking for someone who will get him and love him even though he is off-center from the rest of society. Because I loved him so much, just like he is (and his sisters did too I might add) he knows someone else will too.

    1. I feel sure he will find someone who appreciates him for himself too. And because those people see deeper than the surface it woild most probably be a quality relationship. Not flippant or superficial.

  3. In Eastern Europe, where I live, it is still not considered a mental illness, thank God. The ‘trends’ take time to get to us, it seems.

    1. If you’ll lucky, the people who buy this stuff will die out before it gets to you. Really.

      Because the young people I know are rejecting it BIG TIME. Rebelling against their parents, see?

  4. Same thing with kids that ADD/ADHD, I think it is not an illness at all. It’s called normal hyperactive children being….children! Some quacks just want to make excuses to stuff pills down people’s throats and make big bucks!

    1. Thank you, Lilly! It’s not something you see in yourself. But I do have this constant clue, these days. My husband tells me I am from the fruit farm, at least once a day. 🙂

      Luckily, women from the fruit farm are the only women he likes!

  5. my natal Uranus is in my 6th house in early degrees of Leo. My children say that I am a no nonsense kind of mom bordering on pure meanness. I really can’t argue that much but my children knew where they stood and had no doubt what the answer would be when a question was ask. Course I was their most valiant champion too. Over all I am pretty happy as a rule.

  6. Sigh… I feel supported 🙂 I am not a cranky person in public, and not in private, but .. I’m different. My life is different. I have to live it this way, but it makes me lonely, because the kind of people you are talking about, are so rare. But I know exactly what you mean, they make life interesting, moving, “progressive” and dynamic instead of static and same old, same old. It is a shame that in difficult times like these, exactly the people who are different enough to make a change in society, are being left out. It must be collective fear 🙂

  7. Uranus in the 1st House , I guess I’m kinda boring, next to Pluto I don’t know how farther out(socially) ,I could be , yet if not my first time visiting this website the material I find entertaining enough to add comment… Positive reflections posted elsewhere ( by Elsa) and a lost earlier post of my own(whether moderated or cyber glych ) are worth noting here . If an antisocial generation passed along their wit that today exists with all the exuberance and energy and dramatics in this generation; then what better to understand why the balance teeters?
    The dawn of the Social Order (anti social) independent conservative and as unopen, as not easily or willing to open up, and no interest to mingle.
    Like wild deer that rarely stray more than a mile off their trail, though their trail may be a hundred miles long, the ulternative presents itself like a zoo.
    Many related posts you may have, of those I read 2 I could pull in
    1) Saturn In Sagittarius Square Neptune In Pisces (The Veil Drops On Pisces)
    August 10, 2014 Elsa ( )
    and 2) Stellium In Leo – August 12-14, 2014 August 5, 2014Elsa
    ( )
    Values between generations don’t always match up like the signs do no matter which direction coming from or going to, specially not on charts, not even on parallel charts. What happens over longer periods of time can be as different as quick changes; what’s important will surface one way or another, or will be lost.
    On a positive note,,,spiritual bonds can change many reality/s.
    Complacency could be a concern thinking what’s at stake in either our physical ecological constructs and or our spiritual well being.
    Funny that anti-social and disorder are the ADHD diagnosis themes, while taboo as astrology is to some, spiritual and anti-decency are deemed “control frees”.
    Harper Valley PTA kinda similarities and bipolarities?

  8. *smiles, waves and nods*
    This remembers me of my childhood. I’ve met a lot of cranky people. I am a cranky person. I do no harm to you if you give me my space. I am kind and friendly by the way, if you don’t cross my line.
    This is actually something I don’t understand nowadays by people. They are like wild animals in a cage. Want to force others to live in similar cages. And think it is the right way of living. But it is not. They get violent (verbally or physically) and don’t even recognize why.

  9. The word ‘cranky’ could cover a lot of things. All I can say is that as I get older, I am beginning to break free of the rules I was forced to endure as a child, and then forgot about. I became an automaton. learn to say no, I am not doing it, as we did as a child before it was manipulated/cohearsed out of us. I as get older I am more of an anarchist. Stand up to those in authority or have some position of influence in your life. JUST SAY NO, when they are trying to manipulate you to do something you really do not want to do. I do have mercury/saturn conjunction in Aquarius which is also parallel, and uranus in virgo opposing mars/sun. Uranus is also mutual recepting mercury.

  10. Yes where have all the fun characters gone? These days people seems to be a lot on the surface and I hate that I want to go deeeeep..We are all for cheap sale on the market now.

  11. I am the one who is forced to interact by people who don’t know better. Mars in Uranus natally so I’m an individual. My dad is a uranian by sun sign and he never forced me to conform apart from house rules and respect which you have to learn as a kid. My mother Scorpio sun and Libra moon and she will force and force and force and then wonder why people don’t wish to interact anymore or just run away. Because according to her we have to be like everyone else and do things like everyone else because we are not individuals were extensions, narcissistic much? Yes.

  12. I love being an individual. Thank god i married a man who loves that too,and is an individual as well. I believe a couple could benefit knowing intuitively what they love about themselves and eachother. But i realize everyones different. 🙂 figured out how to do smileys on phone. Duh.

  13. I was mulling over your earlier post on feeling counter culture and what that means exactly. I heard a very confusing comment last nite from one of the loud and righteous. It ain’t pretty. He said, fatherless, uneducated black youth, will never be able to get a job and be part of mainstream America. My question was, what is mainstream America? I understand mainstreet America. It’s where I live and experience life. Mainstream though, what the heck is that.

    I remembered an interview with an ex DoD guy. His delivery was so dry, it was funny. It’s his character. The comment that stuck with me is something like, ‘there is this concern that the world order is coming apart. Why ever did anyone think there ever was a world order.’ I almost peed my pants in hysterics.

  14. The coolest compliment I’ve ever received: “most people remind me of someone else, but you don’t remind me of anyone. You are truly unique.”

  15. I always thought antisocial meant actively hurting people, not being introverted or cranky (asocial?). Different meanings?

  16. This post is great, I really needed to read that. I have a lot to say about my experience with trying to be homogenized by my family, I might write about it on the forum. My whole family (and the Latino culture I was put into by the universe as a cruel joke) has extreme Libran characteristics. And I keep doubting myself because my North Node is in the 7th house so I do need to develop certain Libran characteristics… or Scorpionic characteristics (its sign) in the Libran realm (which would result in behavior considered “asocial”)? I really hope it’s the latter, I refuse to conform.

    I have Saturn retrograde in the 11th also.
    Virgo Sun in the 4th.
    Aries Moon in the 12th.
    Taurus rising (which makes me Venus ruled and I have venus in Libra so I also want to please them)
    Cancer Mars in the 3rd

    Very antisocial placements or not?

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