I Love My Lying, Cheating Husband

Melancholy,  Domenico Feti,Hello Elsa,

I’ve been married for 6 years now, although my marriage shouldn’t have lasted a year. Within the last six years, my husband has cheated, lied, and disrespected me. I really want to leave, but I can’t. Our three kids are all five years or younger, and my husband takes care of the kids while I work.

There have been so many times that I’ve told him that I will leave. He really just doesn’t care. I think that this is my fault, because I tell him I’ll leave and then never do it. I do love him and he does have his good side, but it is rare that we see it. I have done so many things for him that no other person will ever do for him. If I told you, I would be writing a book.

The only reason I’m still here is that I need him to take care of the kids while I go to work. Also – if I leave, I don’t have anywhere to go. I don’t know what to do. Every time we see each other we argue. I love him, but I just want to leave most of the time.

What should I do?

Wife Desperately In Need of Advice

Dear Wife,

Are you sure that you love him? Are you sure you don’t mean, you pity him? Feel sorry for him because he’s pathetic?

And are you sure you’re not just saying that out of habit? Or because you think you should, considering you live with the son of a bitch? Because judging from you post, you don’t love him one iota! Not a drop! Not really.

With your Virgo and your Pisces, what you love is to sacrifice yourself. And then call it love. So here is my advice: first, get your head out of the clouds. You don’t love the lying, cheating bastard you’re supporting. Once you have that clear, it will occur to you: you have no choice but to get yourself and your kids out of this situation.

Doing this will be very hard. That it will be hard is a BLESSING. Because once you commit to this course of action, you will be very busy making phone calls… finding support for yourself and your children. You will not have time to waste on your husband. You will essentially be growing up. And if it sounds like I think all this is a foregone conclusion, I don’t.

You can live exactly as is until you die, if you like. You can train your children to believe this is all there is in life. But with Saturn in Leo transiting your first house, and your Sun Mercury conjunction, the universe begs you to clutch it up. It begs you to do whatever you need to do to undo what you did in error six years ago. And me? Well, I am part of the universe.

Good luck.

pictured: Melancholy c. 1620, Domenico Feti, Oil on canvas, 168 x 128 cm

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