Hi Elsa,
I’m dating an Aquarius right now. We met back in high school and remained friends till 4 years ago when things between us kinda grew. It was a fast and very rocky start. We always fought and argued and it was a very, very difficult time for me. Eventually things started to fall into place and we’ve come a long way.
We’ve been doing great, but we fall into our ruts every couple of months. As of lately however, I’ve been feeling really insecure. I know he loves me but I’m still scared that he might be doing something. I’ve also been stressed out because my grandfather is ill and I think that may be one of the reasons I’ve been insecure. Stress = less self esteem. This has led me to become ‘needy’ as he puts it and it has caused some arguments. We’ve spoken about marriage, not yet engaged, but we’re planning on our futures together.
During the first year of our relationship, I went to a fortune teller who told me he wasn’t the one for me. I guess I wanted to see if things have changed and what our future will hold. What is my love forecast – our love forecast? Is he the one for me? Will we get married and if so, when? What is our future together?
Thank you. I really appreciate your help and advice.
Capricorn Moon
United States
Dear Moon,
Fortune tellers don’t get to decide what your future is; you do. They also do not get to judge which man is “the one” for you.
And further, there are billions of people on this planet. You could conceivably marry any single one of them and if you did, then they’d be “the one”. So if there is but one thing you take from this blog, I hope you will erase the fortune teller’s words from your psyche because they are foolish, frivolous and meaningless.
Now how about some facts? Fact is, you have a mixed bag with this guy. There are obvious differences. He’s an Aquarian with Venus in Aquarius and does not like clinging all that much. You have a Capricorn Moon and need to be reassured of your worthiness and these things don’t really speak to each other so well.
On the other hand, with Saturn squaring his Sun and Moon, I imagine he “detaches” as a defense against his own feelings of insecurity. So you see the plot thickens! But here’s the thing:
There is no “the one”. It you pick “this one” you will deal with certain issues. The space/needy issue for sure. And the fact you are both pretty serious characters.
And if you pick another one, you will deal with another set of issues. So I think what you are doing is asking the wrong question.
The question should not be. “Is this the one?” The question should be, “Am I happy?” Because at the core of this, you are afraid you are making a mistake. But if you go with what is true in your heart and in your soul, you will never make a mistake.
Good luck.
I have worked as a professional psychic and would never tell someone they should be with this person or that person. I have enough trouble making my own decisions in life. A good psychic can bring things from your unconcious to your conscious awareness. That’s it. If you don’t already know it somewhere in your being, the “fortune teller” is just wrong.
You are always in choice. The future is not set in stone and there is no one you *SHOULD* be with. Only people we choose to be with or choose to move on from.
Ok but so, in the end, what’s the point of horoscope then?
To Carnatic re: (#2)
The value of a horoscope is to show what ‘package of energies’ each person comes with.
What each person *chooses* to do with those energies is up to them. (And that choice, that free will, cannot be seen by anybody looking at a chart, or into a crystal ball.)
What ‘package’ you *choose* to buy is up to *you*. (What guy you choose to marry. It’s a **choice**, NOT ‘destiny’.)
Think of the chart as the list of ingredients and nutrition value of a product in a grocery store.
There is nothing wrong with wheat. Lots of people eat wheat and are fine. Me? It makes me sick. So I *choose* to avoid products with wheat in them, because I don’t like being sick all the time. But then, it’s not like peanuts. Wheat won’t *kill* me. So sometimes I ‘cheat’. I *choose* to allow myself a hamburger (wheat bun), for example, once in a while. It makes me a little bit sick, for a little while, but it’s bearable. Somebody else might not be able to have wheat *at all*.
Back to your case, astrology can help you see what’s in your product (what kind of person you are) and what’s in your boyfriend’s product (what kind of person he is) and then it’s up to you to see if you want to ‘eat’ him, and up to him whether he wants to ‘eat’ you.
Does he feed you, and nourish you, and make you feel better, and help you grow? Do you feel healthier for having him in your life (body), or do you feel miserable?
His list of ingredients include a tendency to be more detached than you, and yours a tendency to need more reassurance than perhaps he provides.
That’s all that astrology can do: ~tell~ you this.
It’s up to each of you as individuals, and the two of you as a couple, to decide if that combo works for the two of you.
And if not, do either or both of you *want* to change (~should~ you?), and if not, do you want to be miserable or happy for the rest of your life?
The choice is yours.
And I don’t think there is a “The One” for us out there. Only ‘packages of energies’ for you to choose from. And as Elsa said, no matter which one you choose, there *will* be problems – guaranteed.
You just need to be clear in your head and heart what types of problems you are willing to live with (because they are minor) and which not (because they are major).
Wow, the answer wasn’t for me, but i’m sure (Elsa and Strawberry Fields) that you both helped a lot of people (including me) by laying that out in such an easy-to-understand way.
Thanks