“He comes over at midnight? That’s pretty late to be comin’ over? Didn’t she give him the Elsa in a pinch speech?” the soldier asked regarding one of my friends.
“Don’t know that’s what he’s doing. Don’t think he’s using her in a pinch. Could be but it doesn’t seem that way to me. He could be but I cant tell if it’s her or if it’s him.”
He stared.
“What if she told him to come over at midnight? What if she invites him to come over late so this is what he does and then she says, this bastard is coming over at midnight.”
“Why do women do that, P? Why do they get the man in trouble like that?”
“Well they don’t necessarily mean to. Let’s say they invite the guy over, he comes over doing exactly what they want. So far so good and maybe they do that all the time.”
“Yeah?”
“But then they tell their girlfriend about it and she says you shouldn’t do that. He’s just using you, dummy. Uh oh. So she thinks, how could I be so stupid! Now she has to undo everything she’s done… now the guy is using her, he’s in big trouble and as far as he knows there is nothing wrong at all. He’s coming over as he’s been invited.”
“Men don’t know about these backroom meetings,” he said.
“No, I guess they don’t.”
“Sure makes things complicated, P. I don’t know how women expect men are going to be able to figure this shit out.”
“Well they don’t figure it out so the men and women break up. And it’s the man’s fault of course. He was using the woman, thanks God the friend just saved her from this,” I said rolling my eyes. There are a lot of women out there, if they are your friend, you’re never have a man. They’ll make sure of that because they just don’t like men. Men can never do anything right even when it’s the woman doing the thing. I see this all the time, it is beyond merely common.”
Have you ever had a woman friend talk you out of a man… unjustified?
Yep!
No, but I’ve had friends try to talk me out of a man and I’ve told ’em to butt out. 😉
On the flipside, I try to dissuade my friends from a man if I think they are being, or have the potential to be, abused, whether physical or otherwise. I’ll also say something if I feel it’s a bad match and my gal’s going to end up dissatisfied or hurt.
If they tell me to stuff it, though, I figure they know what they’re doing and do my best to keep out of it.
I don’t know what this would be, astrologically. I’ve got a stellium in Libra (Mars-Venus-Pluto) and Capricorn rules the 7th house, which is empty. Or is it something different?
yep. pretty much every relationship there’s some woman nearby: “oh my god, i can’t believe yer still with him. *scoff* what’s wrong with you. he [enter bad thing here]…”
really annoying. moon opposite venus. my lady friends never like my other friends, especially if they’re male.
This is why I just keep my mouth shut and don’t say anything. I guess people are gonna do what they’re gonna do and it’s none of my business. 🙂
I’ve had women try, but they never succeed.
1) I’m too stubborn (if I like him & you don’t, I don’t care)
2) I’m rebellious (if I like him & you don’t, I like him even more)
3) I generally dislike women for exactly this type of behaviour and I avoid women like that as I would leprosy…
And for what it’s worth, I’m usually the “user” anyway 😉
sometimes it might be something in the middle– he doesn’t get around to seeing her till midnight and she’d rather see him than not. it’s not that he’s using or she’s a doormat, necessarily, but eventually it gets more skewed. she wonders why other things are more important and eventually he stops coming by at midnight cos it’s too late.
talked a man out of me, several times
several who tried the reverse, though
Nope. My friends trust my judgement in people, period. Which is actually quite the compliment, now that I think about it.
Nope. But then I’m very hard to talk out of anything.
Sure! That meeting in the back room, the one where she’s saying “He’s using you!” That’s my mom! All men are bad, have bad intentions and are using me. Except for my ex… he’s a gemini, she has 3 inner planets in gemini and thinks he’s a prince who can do no wrong…