Overriding My Desire To Complain

I was upset by a situation recently. I am in a position where I can righteously complain.

By that I mean that I really was wronged. But further, I will be directly asked to make remarks about the scenario. Boy would I like to offload.

However, if I give into this temptation, someone will be hurt by it. I really don’t care that the offending person was clearly wrong. If she is hurt, I will be the one who inflicted the pain.  Deep down, I know it’s not the smartest thing.

With this decided, the universe upped the ante on me. Another gal approached me, infuriated at being wronged in the exact same way I was. By the same person! So now if I complain, I can kid myself that I am doing it defend this other woman.  But it does not change anything, really. I will hurt the the offending person and definitely make myself an enemy.

This means I have to resist my urge to complain, even though I am pretty sure I will be prodded. I just want to say this: sometimes I really hate being a grown up.

It’s my Leo vs my Capricorn. I don’t like this Saturn transit, I want a SUN transit, whines Leo!

Who can relate?

30 thoughts on “Overriding My Desire To Complain”

    1. My husband advised I do nothing. As soon as he said it, I knew it was the strongest play.

      If I say nothing it will get around – she said nothing. If I say something, it will also get around but it will be altered, edited, etc.

      I think this may be why there was a problem in the first place. Something I said was mis-repeated or shared out of context.

      Anyway, someone came to my defense to tell me it was happening because my energy was so strong. Attract as I repel.

      I was wearing a red shirt and stated, that I regretted it. I have Pluto rising / lunar return this month. I really think less will be more…I just want to rant.

      I wrote this tonight to stop me from doing exactly that, tomorrow night.

      I also want to be less involved, less inflaming and inflamed.

      On another post someone said they realized they had to lie / say what someone wanted them to, to get a job. Really, people can handle so little anymore. If you know a normal person, thank God or your lucky stars, if you’re so inclined.

  1. Depends what you can do to offload the pain. Complaining into a journal or a can.. or to a stranger… but then again karma

    Nvm. I got a wrong idea

    I havent found a way not to complain and get what i want. I dont know the right perspective.
    It is what it is doesnt really go with my self inflated delusional egotism. Complaints spill out of me if i hold them in.

    1. “Complaints spill out of me if i hold them in.”

      This is what I don’t want to happen.

      Poker face, instead. Shrug and say, “I got nothin’.”

      I just want to learn to discern what’s “small stuff”… and I have such an all encompassing, epic problem right now, I simply have to reorient myself or I will never make it.

  2. “It’s my Leo vs my Capricorn. I don’t like this Saturn transit, I want a SUN transit, whines Leo!”

    this reminds me of how I feel when my Scorpio & Aquarius work against one another … I crave intensity but then I’m horrified at how intense I am …

  3. Yep, my Cap and my Leo are duking it out too. It’s all about being a grown up. Leo’s gotta give it up and figure out another way to shine in this new reality.

  4. I’m actually leaning in the other direction. After biting my tongue and adjusting for others my whole life, I’m starting to call a spade a spade and hold people accountable for their actions.

    1. libra noir, I had to smile at this because…me too.

      Plus I have noticed that people now amp up their behavior when they feel they got away with the first jabs. A kind, quiet woman I work with has been lied about and mauled and it is only getting worse, her polite silence used against her. As someone once said, maybe we are meant to speak up to be the instruments of karma…

      1. Thank you for that villagegirl:) I’ve tried to stay out those kinds of games that people play and thought that it would help me avoid some unwanted karma for myself. But I’m starting to see that all I did was absorb others negativity to my own detriment (and to their detriment too, ultimately). I think I finally have the spiritual foundation to not take on others pain and hatred and also maintain my own integrity and standards of behavior. It’s not coming from a vindictive place (which is what I was always trying to avoid). It’s coming from a place of respect. Ie “I kindly will not allow you to shit on me, while I keep a smile on my face. I’m giving you back your own shit. It’s not my purpose here on earth to do your healing for you.”
        It’s amazing to me how people will do exactly what you allow them to do. It’s taken me a long time to realize that most people are sheep and will derive their cues on how to behave by what they are allowed to get away with. (They might feel guilt but have no idea why. It’s really because they have a fractured sense of self and are denying some part of themselves).

  5. I feel your pain Elsa. My Moon in Gemini is conjunct Venus on one side and Mars on the other. They’re equally staggered on both sides so I feel like I’m in a constant battle (Gemini) in my mind to either 1) aggressively lash out and burn the person royally (Mars) or 2) maintain the peace and not ruffle any feathers (Venus) Usually Venus wins out but over time, it’s worn me down to a nub. It is exhausting to do the Venus thing these days. I’ve been owning Mars more and more lately. It’s been wonderful ?

  6. anonymoushermit

    I threw stuff when I was 16 years old. Let’s just say it didn’t help my reputation in my family, LOL!

    I do have a diary now, full of all my rage and fiery hate.

  7. Can’t relate. Too much Sagittarius for this. First let things out, then think about it if at all. Sometimes is better to shut up. Especially if you’re in a weak or dependent position. Even then it isn’t easy because people often aren’t aware of what they’re doing and need feedback. I was once the complete opposite and people were also not talking to me, but not talking never ended well.

  8. Avatar

    Hmm… could blow over in a bit… if that’s what you’ve determined. The people who matter aren’t going to care too much. Breathe in and out and feel the cool air coming in, and just know you’re loved and all that. Especially if you’re trying to keep it cool.

  9. People will sometimes test you with very toxic words or actions. I crossed a line and made a rule for myself, which is that I won’t disparage others. If they are horrible, I assume they are off balance or crazy and remove myself from the equation. The side benefit is that you disconnect from that very toxic vibration which makes it easier to focus on that which means the most to you.

    1. Thanks, VT. I am trying to become someone who resists the temptation to disparage someone. I am not big on that anyway. But the way things are for me today, I really think I’m well advised to follow your example.

      The line has been drawn for me, in a way. It’s like shopping all the time and then your income is cut in half. That’s it. Time for a change! 🙂

  10. My policy during Mercury retrograde is to keep quiet or let things pass if possible. I also usually most want to blurt out my anger or offload on someone it seems during Mercury retro. There are a lot of triggers and often like now I am frustrated by delays or shortages. Or provoked by someone else’s outburst! I’ve just found it leads to getting enmeshed in crap I didn’t want to deal with or burning bridges unnecessarily. It seems things can really escalate during these phases. It’s not easy but keeping quiet or laying low during these phases often seems wisest in retrospect, because things that seemed so out of whack right themselves or pass. I think one of the suggestions about Mercury retrograde is that often people say things they wish they’d left unsaid because it leads to unintended complications.

    1. Or like just now, someone send me irritable email about something that has been done, they may not have seen the message or it will need to be sent again. A lot of wires can get crossed during Merc retro and jumping to conclusions doesn’t really help.

  11. Always think tactically. It’s rarely the right thing to just let it out. Causes more problems. That doesn’t mean you suck it up, you just come up with an even better plan to get what you need out of the situation. Temporarily the person is off the hook, but not forever. You make sure you get a benefit along with your satisfaction, when the time is right.

  12. I think you might want to look at it as an investment. Are you so vested in the situation that you will get a good return by making your complaint known? Or will you get a better payoff by using your energies elsewhere? Also, if at least one other person has the same complaint,is it really up to you to be the person who vocalizes this? If it’s the Capricorn that seems to be ruling the situation for you, then I would guess it’s best to view it by looking at the return of the investment of your energy here.

  13. I don’t know…sounds kinda fun or interesting in a detached things should get interesting right about now sort of way. How to let the world expose and hopefully destroy what should be. No fuss no muss!

  14. i’d need more context. but there’s lots of cases where it’s better not to get involved any further than one already is…

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