A regular reader emailed in concern after I made a comment… this is what I said in part:
“… I am losing like a mf, I am taking losses I can and will never recover from but they are simply not on this front.”
I was cautioned to not make statements as you risk writing your own ticket and I while I agree in principal, in this case I chose my words quickly and believe I was misunderstood. I decided to put this up to clarify in case anyone else read that comment and had similar concern.
I explained to the person who wrote me that if I were to lose my daughter I would go on. I would continue to do the very best I could as I have done since I was 5 years old but I would never recover the loss. I would and could accept it but to actually ‘get over” the loss of a child I am pretty sure you would have to have a screw loose.
pictured : Rinaldo Abandons Armida, Giovanni Battista Tiepolo, 18th century, oil on canvas, detail of grieving woman
This is very interesting to me. I have several people in my life who feel very strongly in the way this reader does.
When you are envisioning your future (as Capricorn can be prone to do) it can be beneficial to ‘write your fate’ and I think this is a very positive manifestation of Mars/Mercury.
In the case of dealing with a child who is very ill, and having to deal with future events, I hope it may help a person to know and accept that life wouldn’t be the same. Some aspects/signs are more adept at this than others. I see it a little bit like buying insurance: when you purchase fire insurance are you jinxing yourself and upping the likelihood of having your house burned down?
I’ve had court action ongoing since late 2002. I have friends if I talk about it they get upset and tell me ‘I’m bringing something into being.’
I can see, essentially, what the other person is saying (we all know someone who’s all doom and gloom, right? And the expression self-fulfilling prophecy comes from somewhere).
But there’s something to be said about vocalizing your fears and what is hunting you. It can be like switching a light on in a dark room.
i think… trying to manifest good things shouldn’t get in the way of recognizing one’s feelings.
or, in this case, recognizing the degree of loss you’re looking at. i think love requires us to do that. but i’ve never had to face something like this so i have no means of comparison. i just know that half a century later my grandmother still grieves her baby. i wonder how could she not?
“I would and could accept it but to actually ‘get over’ the loss of a child I am pretty sure you would have to have a screw loose.”
Yeah, that sounds about right. I’ve watched my grandparents since the death of their eldest child 16 years ago. It took a very long time for them to be anything even resembling ‘ok’. I think they’ve reached a point where they’ve accepted it as much as is possible, but they will never get over it.
Losing a child, losing a parent (too young or suddenly) — nope, you don’t get over it. You live your life, but changed.
And neither should someone. That depth of feeling after such a loss is a gift.