I was talking to a client who is having a Pluto transit. Some uncomfortable feelings are surfacing for her.
I told her of the first time I had something come up from the deep that made me realize I played a very large part in the bad thing that happened to me. You might even say I orchestrated it, although I wasn’t conscious of it at the time.
It really doesn’t matter if I was conscious. The event occurs when you realize that part of your character is very dark, primal, base…whatever word you choose. Then what do you do?
Have you ever uncovered a truth about yourself, that made you uncomfortable? How did you deal with it?
There’s a great book called Existential Kink that talks about just that. Our shadow creating the bad experiences in order to have an outlet to reveal itself. And if we can acknowledge that there is some pleasure in the pain, we start operating from a healthier and more whole and powerful place.
This Venus conjunct Pluto transit has been revealing a lot of deep truths. They have made me feel uncomfortable and even emotional. I think I need to understand and process these experiences.
I need to learn from them
Oh yes, and I thought I was being so nice, doing so well and being so righteous. I had a lot of Pluto transits. Pluto conjunct natal mercury in 8th house, square natal moon in Aries. (which is also conjunct my natal Saturn and I’m a capricorn sun) Death was an issue, my son had cancer, I had a car crash, my father did pass away when Pluto squared Saturn. I also received death threats. It was a chaotic time and I thought I was a victim until I looked at reality squarely and questioned my actions in it. Some things were unavoidable, but it took time for me to realise I was on one of the biggest ego trips of my life. It wasn’t until I walked away from a public role I was playing, (which was being whipped up by others too,) and cut it, totally walked away from it and left it permanently, did I get my whole life back on the straight and narrow. I learned so much about my dark self, my hidden agenda, about personal power and how we abuse it and how power works between others and how they abuse it. I saw the low down on manipulation and knew I was in the wrong place, a place I had thought had different values. Pluto taught me to walk away and get my act together. I have become humble as I am embarrassed at what I learned about myself, but grateful for the insight and courage to reform and rebuild. Respect for Pluto.
Yep, you’ve surely been there. But to figure something like this out, unleashes all sorts of personal power.
Thank you Elsa, and thank you again as your insightful posts were part of that journey, your reflections, wisdom and honesty steered me through many a dark moment. It was a scary time, as it was mercury being conjuncted by pluto I thought I was going to lose my mind, go mad, forever. (Pluto-death-mercury-mind) Your many, many posts and references to previous posts were lifesaving. Respect to you too, Elsa.
Thanks and you’re welcome! 🙂
During the Pluto in Capricorn period, which hits my chart hard, I have discovered that I have some wonderful aspects, and also some very sketchy ones…But the truth is liberating..
Pluto hitting my IC then squaring my Libra stellium was a huge revelation for me. Particularly pertaining to the psychological family inheritance and my role in the events that unfolded. There’s no going back now.