What Am I Supposed To Learn From Suffering AIDS?

virgo Vintage cigarette cardHi, Elsa

My health started spiraling down around thanksgiving 2015 to the point of coming within weeks of death my T cells where almost non-existent; I did not know. The first week of January I was diagnosed with HIV AIDS and was brought back from the point. Within a week of being discharged from pneumonia I landed back with meningitis. After all those treatments I had all kinds of ailments even warts on my neck and face. I healed and 6 months later as I write this question I’m back in a hospital bed with what ended up being a parasite after spinal taps and MRIs the doctors were thinking it was a lymphoma: cancer!

My Sun is in Virgo. My question would then be, what can I attribute this wonderful learning experience to? Jupiter’s passing through Virgo or a precursor to my demise as I was born with a 12th house Aquarius?

Since I’ve been following your 12th house Pluto transit in hopes of answers from the “unknown” I’m wondering if you have survival pointers for this transit: I’m mortified. I honestly don’t think I’ll survive it.

Best regards and lots of love,
Concerned Virgo

Hi, Virgo. I’m sorry for all you’ve been through. If I were in your shoes, I’d be wondering about my survival as well. However, I’d not count you out just yet!

First, your Moon is conjunct Pluto in Scorpio. You have clear regenerative abilities as has been proven by what’s transpired during this ordeal. You also have Saturn in Scorpio. When I put these things together, I’d say you’re hard to kill!

Now as for the lesson or the learning, that’s a good question and the right one to be asking. Saturn in Sagittarius is squaring your stellium in Virgo, including your Sun or your life force. He’s also squaring Mercury, ruler of your Sun and health and tests and all this running around. Saturn creates pressure. You’re being pushed down. You’re pushing back, which is the right thing to do. But besides that, you’ll benefit by searching for meaning (Sagittarius) at this time. Writing me is part of this but you have to go deeper.

First, get rid of all traces of feeling like a “victim” as that’s a trap. You want to go higher. What’s this mean in your life? AIDS?

Clarity will be easier to come by if you can transcend your fear as well. Clearly, you may die. But you may not die. If you don’t die, what does this MEAN? And what service can you offer?

I mean that last sentence. You’re a Virgo. You don’t get a day off! Saturn is transiting 10th house at this time. How might you set an example for people at this time?

I’ll give you an idea. We had a little exchange behind the scenes. Your writing and your manner is exemplary. Seriously, I’ve enjoyed this exchange with you, beyond all others in the last year, anyway. You’re freakishly nice and considerate. Isn’t that something?

It is something. There you are, flat on your back. You’re impressing me; a person who almost completely lacks the ability to be impressed. Surely there is a reason you should be spared. Look for it! I think you’ll break through.

To reiterate – these are the keys – you are actively seeking. You are not a victim, paralyzed by fear.

Also, you’re thinking about death.  Try thinking about life and death.  What will you do if you survive? Plan (Saturn) for the future (Sagittarius) as if you have one. Because you very well may.

Good luck!

Have a question about astrology or life? Ask here! Also, please include your location. It adds a layer of interest!

8 thoughts on “What Am I Supposed To Learn From Suffering AIDS?”

  1. That is an amazing answer to an amazing question. I send my warmest and most heartfelt thoughts and prayers to this dear person in Mexico. Everyday is a gift and I believe this lovely Virgo still has many gifts to share.

  2. Hello Virgo. I am also a Virgo (Virgo Sun, Moon, and Mars, and also with Saturn in a not happy alignment with that stellium) and I also have a life threatening illness that can be kept under control with very expensive medicines. My dad has this same condition (it’s genetic). Ever since I was young, he taught me to let other people see my pain. It makes it hurt more for you… but it makes it hurt less for others. Be open with your experiences, don’t hide the fact that you have AIDS from people. This will cause you pain — you’ll see people judge you and people shun you. But others will see these bad actions happen, and they’ll be challenged to confront whatever they are judgmental about. They will be challenged to rise above and become kind and gentle to a world that is judgmental and hate-filled.

    Most importantly, though, someone who is hiding their ailment could see you. Open, honest, vulnerable — but strong in that vulnerability. You may never know that this person sees you because they may never reveal themselves. But you can know, that if this occurs, they will be given strength to carry on.

    This is poor consolation for a chronic illness. “I am ill constantly so that I can inspire others who are ill constantly to live better lives so that they can inspire others to live ill constantly well, also?” I’ve tried to read some books about why chronic illness exists in the first place. I got sick not even half way through C. S. Lewis’ “The Problem With Pain” Everyone wants to talk about… I’m broke now because I wasted money, so this is teaching me a lesson about finances. But it doesn’t make any sense — I’m sick now because I was born with a genetic issue. That has no sense, no meaning, to me.

    I cannot tell you the root meaning of it all, but I can urge you to do what my dad did, and what I do, is to be vulnerable and strong at the same time and let people see your hurt. Show people humility by graciously accepting any charity or simple grace given you. It is not nice to live life being an “inspiration” to others… I do not enjoy it. But it does give me some sort of reason or purpose to have to live it.

  3. Thank you so much, Concerned Virgo, Elsa, and Grisbear, for your amazing and powerful words. I’m a Virgo stellium and struggling with similar issues and thoughts. Your words are more than highly appreciated, I’ve bookmarked this page to re-read and draw strength from.

  4. Be a badass, Concerned Virgo!

    You know when you are afraid of heights and they tell you’don’t look down’? It’s your turn not to look down.

  5. Concerned Virgo, I second (and triple) everything Elsa said. I don’t know you, nor do I have Elsa’s well-honed talent.. What I do have, is an ear for when things ring true. As, Elsa’s reply to you. ::good wishes::

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to Top