This morning I read Elsa's newsletter and thought "THAT'S what I was talking about the thread I wrote weeks ago (the one that scared people).
I went back over some of the stuff I listened to regarding the conjunction. It's not that there will be NO grace afterwards--but there will be less. I missed that. What I keep hearing is that Saturn/Pluto is like Judgment Day--people who have worked hard at whatever they're supposed to work on (even if it's, say, better self-care or drawing boundaries) will reap the rewards. They are moving onward and upward! Those who messed around or got lazy during Saturn's time in Capricorn? They will squirm on the hook while all the things they hid will come to light for the world to see. There will be no place to run.
This still makes me a bit nervous. No one is getting away with anything. Don't know about you, but I'm crossing my fingers that I will be rewarded and not flayed, you know?
Happy New Year, and new decade, everyone!
I'm not sure about karma, but it's like a mountain goat trying not to fall off a mountain. Great post. 
I didn't read it that way. This is what stuck out for me ......
I'm trying to be rid of some elements of my character so other elements can flourish!
I didn't take away devastation. I have worked hard on somethings. Other things I took a stab at it and didn't do as well. I am human. I suck sometimes greatly. We all do. I want my character to always be good. But, it ain't! No ones is! I have deep flaws just like we all do...and it takes work to undo some of this stuff.
We have had this energy since back in April.... I have felt it for most of the year. Please don't worry. You are going to be awesome.
So, its judgement day? What happens? We die? No.... we get kicked in the ass and then get back up. That is what we do. We get corrected. I have been corrected 3000 times in my life. We all have in one way or another. You have already been through hell. Please don't let it scare you. You are going to do great!
No place to run? There is never any place to run. Everything we do catches up with us all eventually. A decision I made 36 years ago still haunts me today. But, it has not killed me. (it did however hurt other people and I can't fix that other than to truthfully apologize for my role in it and hope to I have made an effort to make up for it and ultimately be forgiven. If not, there is nothing I can do now. I have to live with it.)
I have to forgive what has been done to me too. Or, how can I expect any grace to come my way?
I was just listening to Saturn/Pluto on the dsc...and what I am doing wrong! I am way too intense. Shit, how do I reel that in? I am trying. It's like a thousand SUNS pouring out of my soul. What do you do with that? Go on meds? I wish someone could jump in my body and feel it for just 24 hours. It sucks. It's bullshit and I am sick of it.
We have to keep on living until we die anyway. We will all live with our decisions and die with them... along the way hopefully find a way to be better. I am going to have to go back to church and ask God to help me. I have found no other way. I can't do it alone.
Yes, these transits through my 12th have been really hard. So much free floating pain and sacrifice... and rejection and on and on and on, like endless lost.
But these things are gone, leaving me with less but more to focus on, if that makes sense.
My daughter's return after 12 years. Fact is, it could have taken 20 or never happened at all.
Right now, I feel it prudent to forgive everyone for everything, speedily. They may be stomping on me in the moment but I am old enough to know, it will turn. You can only hope you have the opportunity to apologize.
That's what happened to my daughter. She thought she may not be able to apologize before she (or) I died... or that it killed, her you know?
You run around pulling all kinds of shit... the longer you do it the harder it's going to be when you fall from your tower.
You run around pulling all kinds of shit… the longer you do it the harder it’s going to be when you fall from your tower. You can only hope you have the opportunity to apologize.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Yes......
Everything we do catches up with us all eventually. A decision I made 36 years ago still haunts me today. But, it has not killed me. (it did however hurt other people and I can’t fix that other than to truthfully apologize for my role in it and hope to I have made an effort to make up for it and ultimately be forgiven. If not, there is nothing I can do now. I have to live with it.)
soup,
I think you should take pride in that you're better than my parents. My parents might have had a total personality disorder, LMAO. You're at least humble enough to admit your faults, wrongs, and mistakes. This is true progress and nothing you should shoo-shoo away, it's deep rooted and organic change. TRUE Plutonian energy.
I would be proud if you were my mother. I never expected my parents to be perfect, and I don't even care if they sometimes took out their frustration (s) on me, but a good amount of 'not putting it all under the rug' and an apology would be nice. 