Forum

The difference betw...
 
Notifications
Clear all

The difference between "probing" and "prying"

Elsa
Posts: 2483
 Elsa
Admin
Topic starter
(@elsa)
Prominent Member
Joined: 19 years ago

I feel there's a difference between probing a person and prying into their personal life but I don't have an easy way to articulate it. It may be my imagination!

Do you see a distinction here?

8 Replies
Sue Ellen
Posts: 195
(@sue-ellen)
Estimable Member
Joined: 15 years ago

I feel a difference between being asked questions out of concern as opposed to gaining fodder for gossip. 
I hesitate to say anything to an aunt who is the gossip. 

Reply
buendia
Posts: 183
(@buendia)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

What comes up for me is that probing occurs in an already open and ongoing conversation. Curiosity, insight, depth.

Prying feels like it’s ignoring boundaries, that are either sensed and disregarded, or directly stated and disregarded. 

Reply
Elsa
Posts: 2483
 Elsa
Admin
Topic starter
(@elsa)
Prominent Member
Joined: 19 years ago

You guys are good at this. Thank you!

Reply
Avatar
Posts: 361
(@warped)
Estimable Member
Joined: 10 years ago

Probing is subtle and civilized, like an interview.  Prying is blatantly invasive, like an interrogation.

Reply
3 Replies
Elsa
 Elsa
Admin
(@elsa)
Joined: 19 years ago

Prominent Member
Posts: 2483

@warped again,  thank you. I don't know why I couldn't / can't articulate this,  myself. Bizarre.

Reply
Avatar
(@warped)
Joined: 10 years ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 361

@elsa 

In your work you probably ask questions that facilitate the client to reveal sensitive information in a safe, comfortable context.  

Reply
Elsa
 Elsa
Admin
(@elsa)
Joined: 19 years ago

Prominent Member
Posts: 2483

@warped oh interesting.  I do ask clients, direct questions, but I tell them, why. Generally,  it's for clarity,  or I just need more info. Like being married for 20 years, is different then being married for two.

Sometimes I ask someone if they love the other person, because I need to know, to best advise them. They also need to know, and stating it out loud, can help with that. 

I never ask a client anything, for my own curiosity.  It's always for a pertinent reason. 

I not a nosy person, truth be told. I remember my bf has a folder on the desktop of his computer,  which I used all the time. I never clicked it.

I wrote about this. Some did not believe me. Others said he wanted me to click it.

I said,  he knows me well enough,  he knows he'd have to communicate that to me. I've just never been a snoop. 

This is like not being an alcoholic.  A giant blessing, basically. 

Reply
CocoPeaches
Posts: 165
(@cocopeaches)
Trusted Member
Joined: 14 years ago

it's fun to read the different answers 😊 

prying is aggressive, disregarding boundaries and using force to get information, like trespassing!

probing is much more passive, putting out sensors to collect info that may be available, just testing the waters.

Reply
Scroll to Top