“Why?” I asked.
“Well I’m a man, P. A man who has not been feminized,” he said.
“I know and I like it. And obviously these gay boys like it as well because they sure do chase you. You realize this didn’t just start. You’re just becoming aware of it but I’m sure gay men have been sniffing around you all your life.”
“Now why is that? Why would that be? Why me?”
“Well gay men like men. They lovvvvve men the same way I love men. This is very easy to understand. It is easy for me to see what drives a gay man because it’s the same thing that drives me. We want a man!”
“Yeah but don’t women want a man?”
“No, not so much. Some of them do but most of them don’t, at least this is how it appears to me.”
“Women don’t want a man? Well what do they want then?” he asked.
“A lot of them want a wallet. Yeah, they don’t want a man. They get one because that’s what comes with the wallet unfortunately. Damn. What a bother. They want to shop and to hell with the man. Other women want a baby not a man. They want someone they can mother or boss around. Or some of them just want sperm so they can make a baby. There are all kinds of things women want but I’d say it’s a minority of women who actually want a man, a man they can’t control or run his life. Because if they did want a man, why would they take all these steps to emasculate a man when they get one which you constantly see?
“Women do go out of their way to emasculate men,” he said. “I see that over and over. Why do they do that?”
“I don’t know, It’s insanity because if you actually want a man it’s the quickest way in the world to get rid of one. But what do we care? You’re a man; I want a man so we’re in business. And the gay boys? Well they want a man too. And you better believe they recognize one so you are always going to attract them in droves. There’s just no way you’re going to go out there and be overlooked by gay men, and women? Well you’re pretty much fantasy material, I’d say. Not that many women want to deal with a man like you in actuality. You’re just too challenging day to day but don’t feel bad. No one wants to deal with me either, for the same reason. But I like us,” I said with a snort. “We’re both constant trouble and fun.”
Where is your Mars?
Mars in Leo in 9th. I don’t want a “real man.” I don’t relate to Real Men who love sports and violence and macho activities worth a damn. I am too girly for them in my interests, but not girly enough to make a good wife.
On the other hand, I don’t go around trying to make men feel like wimps either. I just would prefer a non-jock, non-sports, non-vehicle-obsessed fellow, given the option.
Usually I have ended up dating gamers.
Mars in Taurus in 6th opposite Neptune 1st. I said yin and yang b/c the main thing I’m interested in is equality in a relationship. In terms of sexual attraction, I like guys who are just like me, same age, same position in life, same career. Guess that’s the Neptune projection.
Mars in Leo in the 8th house. I want a man who oooozes masculinity and confidence. Yum, very primal and erotic.
This subject has been a study of mine for a while now. When I was younger (and VERY unaware), I looked for a relationship that emulated what I grew up with…which was a very ‘masculine’ mother and very ‘feminine’ father…thinking that was what I wanted.
It never worked. The men who were ‘feminine’ soon repulsed me. It was the ‘masculine’ ones who turned me on – and still do.
Now I know why.
Mars in Scorpio on the ASC. In order for some man to deal with me, they have to be very centered & certain of their masculinity. Besides, there is a rather creepy dynamic that can come into play with Mars in Scorpio – drawing those who want to “play” submissive. YUCK!!! could be why I ended up with an Aries Sun/Mars in Scorpio man . . . 😀
Ha ha Neith! Yeah, that might have something to do with it. Consciousness ROCKS!
I used to date what my mom called “he/she’s”….yeah, ok. I have libra on the descendent and no feminine planets. Cravin’ what I lack and uranus conjunct the descendent..so any guy who is ‘different’. Well different means something ‘different’ for me the last year or so…so last two guys are ‘guy guys’ and I LOVE it. My current beau is awesomely manly.
I want a man with testosterone who can withstand my agressiveness and play with it like the swords you and the soldier have with words. I want him to be masculine but have a soft heart. AND I want him to be a dreamer who pursues his dreams and factors mine in as well.. and I’d do the same. I had such a man in the spring and he went off to work in switzerland. Not surprising really as it was what I wanted. Next time I just want to be invited too.
Mars in libra on ascendent on 12th side.
The cool thing is the type of man I now want has been approaching me.. but I’ve been too shy to recognize it when it’s happening. Lol I’m not used to it.
I want no confusion – a man, a real one, recognisable in the distance. I dream of the strong silent types…I know it’s wrong. 😉
Mars in Libra, I never pay attention to it but it’s close to the Descendant.
Oh, geez. . . I have Venus in Libra – I don’t know what I want! *LOL*
I finally figured out what was best for me a few years back. I’m a manly-girl, so I need a partner that is man enough to handle that, but girl enough that he doesn’t need to “compete.” That, to me, is a manly-man, not the insecure, macho-type stereotypical man. Thankfully, I found what I was looking for.
True story time: One of my best friends was dating a guy that just could NOT stand me, always doing the macho one-upmanship thing and trying to prove he was Alpha. (I AM Alpha, I don’t need to prove it. hehe) Finally I got tired of it and told him point-blank, “Look, this is pathetic. You’re just scared of me because I have bigger balls than you and could steal your girlfriend if I felt like it.” To which his girlfriend replied, “Yeah, pretty much.” 😀 Although he never liked me any better, at least I didn’t have problems with him after that. 😉
I voted ‘I want a woman.’ Not because I am gay, but because I don’t like men who are masculine in a traditional gender role stereotype way. My sweetheart looks like a thug but is very ladylike. I love how he confounds his male friends. He’s surrounded by men but they all talk to him about their feelings! It’s very sweet and hot as hell.
Oops, Mars in Aries conjunct Venus.
i don’t get it. why wouldn’t one (biologically oriented that way) want a man? granted, the definition of “a man” can vary, but… a self respecting partner, at the least? one who’s not afraid of being themselves, and in their body?
feh.
i guess it’s because i wouldn’t want to spend that much time with someone squashed. way too boring.
mars/pisces/7th
I love men who are men and have historically chosen very manly men for partners. And I’m very attracted to women who are womanly. Men who are submissive usually turn me off but men and women who toy with gender stereotypes while still maintaining their maleness or femaleness are the best.
Mars in Virgo conjunct midheaven. Also Jupiter in Gemini in my 7th house – I want it all.
I can be quite androgynous in my attitudes and behaviour – bottom line: I’m only submissive when I want to be – and I don’t think a man’s man would appreciate that very much. Maybe some of the fire sign guys, but certainly not Capricorn or Cancer!
My boyfriend is also androgynous in some respects.
He has 5 planets in water signs and Libra rising, with Pluto (his ruler)conj NN in the 1st.
He has Mars in Leo and Sun square Saturn, so fortunately there’s enough willpower there to match my own – and then some, at times;)
My Mars is in Libra, and it forms a stellium with Mercury, Venus and Pluto within 9 degrees. Jupiter in Gemini is my chart ruler…
I voted “A balance of yin and yang”:)
Jen,
ROFL. That is what came to mind when you said “not not not” I thought… then what is left? Gamers, Geeks, etc. Too funny.
I hope this isn’t a duplicate but I sumbitted and my comment got eaten.
I have to say “Bleh” to the idea of having a romantic relationship with a man’s macho macho man. Those kinds are good for friends, but I’m not attracted to them. I like a geek who is kind and can fix my computer. And it doesn’t hurt if he’s pretty. I like pretty over handsome.
My mars is in Virgo 2nd house, conjunct Jupiter and part of a complicated grand trine packed with planets.
I want a sensitive man who is independent. No mama’s boys, but no type-A macho men either. I want a man I can talk about feelings with (Mercury in Cancer) but who will not suffocate or limit me (Moon in Aries). Someone who stands up for themselves but doesn’t cross over into dominating me! Mars in Leo.
i voted all man. i’ve got mars in scorpio, and my husband is a regular guy kind of man. he’s not a homophobe but wouldn’t be caught dead even window-shopping metrosexual. he likes my soft skin and girl smell. he watches football sometimes and doesn’t like to shop or cook. but he does like to cuddle with me and he tells me he loves me all the time. he’s got feelings but he’s also got a clear idea of how they are to be handled-in a manly way, damnit. 🙂
Mars (conjunct mercury) in Taurus in House 9, Venus in Gemini in House 10… I want a guy who’s not the least bit effeminate (but not homophobic either), and intelligent… much more intelligent than I am would be nice as long as he’s not a jackass about it.
Also a guy who’s sensitive and emotional but doesn’t cry easily or often at all. Someone who’s got a ridiculous level of control… a Capricorn type personality
Give me the real kind anyday; the wimps I can´t be bother with !
Sun in Libra, mars in Virgo in 1st house opposition moon. Married to a man with sun conjunct mars in aries.
Nothing is more unattractive than a man who cannot stand up for himself (when I´m around…)
With mars conjunct the ascendent in Leo it´s a fact that many women and quite a few men as well find me sort of scary. And I look very feminin…
Moselle, I think Marsy women have to very masculine men, otherwise we dominate and it is possible to be both strong and feminine.
I mean my writing is very yang (mars conjunct mercury in a yang sign and house) – but the whole of me is ultra-ultra female and I want a ultra-ultra MAN for sure… for balance.
My husband is Sun/Venus (in EXACT conjunction) in Aquarius and Moon/ASC in Cancer. His sun and Venus are in the 7th at that…so he’s really very catering and understanding of women. He’s is in no way “feminine” in his mannerisms or anything like that, but I really find that he has a good balance. He takes care of all the “manly” duties, but he’s sensitive enough to talk with me about girly things I want to talk about. I don’t think I’d fare well with an ultra-man.
..oh yeah…and my Mars is in Cancer. Big surprise, haha.
Can I elaborate more? Hehe…sorry, I have to brag on my husband because I think I have greatest catch =)
He’s the type that is into cars, sports, handy-work, etc. But he also cooks, picks up his mess, very hygienic, and is patient as hell when we go shopping (he holds my bags and doesn’t rush me).
Girls flock to him (not really, more like find him easy to talk to), and gay guys hit on him (which bothers him, but what can he do??)…it must be that sun/Venus conjunction.
…and he’s mine =)
‘Ultra-ultra man’.
Mmmmm. Yes please.
Oh sorry, got a bit carried away there….Mars in Leo, Mars ruling the 7th.
Elsa I agree re: marsy women (speaking as a marsy woman myself)
Well I have a new man since the last time I wrote on this thread. He’s manly!
He also talks to me about his feeeeeeeelings is very emotional
He’s a Sun/Stellium in Leo/10th House,
Scorpio/Moon ASC
His Scorpio neptune/Moon is trine his Cancer Mars
He’s also big and gruff like my ex, but verrry affectionate. Loving the Leo..
my chart is very yang…I tend to draw very yin men…but I want “as much man as possible”…definitely *sigh* one day 😉 [Mars in Gemini]
Mars in Scorpio, Venus in Capricorn. I want a balance of Yin and Yang.
Wow Pat! me too! But I do like ‘bad boys’ Mars in the 12th? I like a man who can oooze warm sexuality and will kind of take the lead more, but who won’t whine in helping around the house. All my boyfriends and my husand have had pretty balanced male/femaleness (Jupiter in Libra in the 11th House?). The last guy I fell for was definately a bad boy but I didn’t really know it until later. He hides his sexuality from me too but before we met and were just talking on the phone he would just say something kinda sexy and I would turn to jello! But then he would turn around and have me in hysterics with his humor. (Cancer moon/ASC with Saturn in Scorpio – him).
Mars in cancer in 9, I want a balanced man, to much testosterone really scares me, he has to be intelligent, sensible and loyal
Mars in 6H Scorpio. It seems to me that when we speak of “manliness” we’re referring to certain types of gender roles that, in my rather queer world, are generally quite conscientiously turned upside-down.
Upside-down or not, I prefer earthier men who aren’t overly-fussy about their appearance and/or personality. This excludes uber-Men and uber-Queens. But then, I also couldn’t spend much time with a boring person, so I do look for a particular combination of Mars and Mercury, while my stellium in Capricorn demands a (very) profound depth of character.
Mars in Aquarius here! I’m not really sure what it means or what I want btw… :/ But I like a manly man with a certain quantity of testosterone.
I have Mars and Venus in Scorpio, and my Mars is conjunct Uranus in the 9th house.
I’m attracted to strong, passionate, intellectual men and women who are flexible in gender role and sure of who they are. I’m definitely attracted to intensity, but both hyper-masculinity and hyper-femininity are turn-offs for me; there needs to be balance (yes, I’ve got Sun in Libra).
I’m not a very feminine-acting woman, and I need a partner who doesn’t want or need that from me. I don’t deal well with clingy, dependent types – I’m independent, and I want my partner to be, too. And I can’t do wishy-washy – only I get to be the indecisive one. 😛
Historically I’ve been a lover of geeks.
I like macho types that will also help around the house. (partner is a great cook!)
Mars Libra, Venus Aquarius.
My Scorpio Asc needs someone who isn’t threatened by my success.
Too much cancer or pisces energy in a man kills it for me.
I want a real man, as much man as possible. But not one who is insecure. 7th house Mars in Gemini oppose 1st house Saturn in Sag. I am an Aries Sun/Venus and I am fairly masculine. I will run all over a man if he lets me. I need someone who is secure enough in his manhood to not allow that and not get upset either.
I am on your page, heavyWater
My Pisces rising makes people think I’m feminine in nature.
But once they know me, all that masculine fire comes out and they are kinda in awe or disgust I should say! Lol.
I like your writing style, that´s why I read your blog. You don´t beat around the bush… ;).
Mars in Aries intercepted in 12th House disconjunct Saturn in Scorpio on the descendant- a sexual abuse survivor.
Now in my fifties I’m married to my dream man, a very macho male feminist! My beloved prefers to work with women, thinks women usually make better bosses, he confronts ego competition in men (usually kindly, sometimes not) reminding them that the planet currently reflects what happens when men run things using babboon troop methods. He encourages women to do it our way, rather than try to mimic the male competitive scene, and he cleans and cooks with no hassling needed.
elsa, i have to agree. my mars is in pisces… but i have a lot of aries (including venus) and i need someone sure of themselves enough that thy won’t let me run over them (which is easy if one has a pluto venus aspect like me.) it’s been awful hard to find one actually.
not too interested in masculine stereotypes. (aries venus wouldn’t stand someone who expected me to be a girly girl anyway.) and, well, my SO is cancer and makes some darn good food, but he’s definitely not _feminine_.
I want someone who has a balanced amount of yin/yang in his personality. Someone in touch with his sensitive side, aware of his needs, emotions, boundaries and able to communicate them back non-agressively but also naturally confident and always self-improving for his sake. Still, I like a masculine apparel- yes to dark luscious hair, dark eyes, deadly eyebrows and some core strength (my mars in aries). Can’t relate with wanting a man for his wallet nor for wanting his babies. And of course, it’s easy to think that everybody says that. I never dated out of financial considerents and never responded to a wealthy suitor because I felt we had nothing in common. I might have venus taurus opp pluto and square saturn but I am not controlled by money. I have mars in aries but I am not controlled by lust. I just want a man with strong hands and soft heart.