Ben and I were talking about men and aging, yesterday. He assured me that men had a very hard time getting older. Basically, they did not like losing function. It’s scares them.
Listening, I can’t say I feel the same. I can understand it, I think. But I don’t feel it in the way he describes.
I’m not sure if this indicates a difference in the psyches of men and women or if it has to do with the individual or if it’s a combination of both. But I take Ben seriously when he talks about men, because he’s gay and he knows a lot of them!
Saturn is in Capricorn! Who struggles most with aging? Men? Women? Or is there some other factor?
I don’t know…I never thought of men in this way. I would think it would be women, but reading this maybe not.
Yes!
Stats from dating sites reveal that 60% of men are attracted to younger women. And of that 60%, the vast majority (51%) like women who are 1 to 4 years younger than them – Zoosk 2017. A younger woman makes a man feel younger and capable – from a psychological stand point there is a feeling of “I battled younger men and won the affections of this young woman”. This is one way men can still feel that they have mojo i.e. I am not old even though I’m getting older.
This makes me so sad and perved out… there are very old men checking out 22 year old women like jackals everywhere I go.. what can ya do..
Unless they are Cap dominant men, Saturn/Capricorn likes them older women. Even Benjamin Franklin who happens to be a Capricorn (wow astrology lol) loves and recommends older women. ^^ there’s alot of quotes on it. He was more into the brains i notice, not really caring about phyiscal physique.
elisa, does this last til quite old age? In my experience they also like very accomplished women, not always older. Really I see so many old men salivating and checking out younger women like it’s very hard for me to stomach. I used to prefer 30 year old guys in my 20s and then I stopped. I feel really disgusting when they (and only they) look at me. Can’t trust old men as wise figures if they objectify people who can be their granddaughters. (Sorry this is something I whine about and can’t seem to get over.. this product of objectification.)
By they I mean old men.. they check anyone younger out (like me) and if you give them a dirty look they keep on.. it makes me feel very insecure and violated.. that’s the number one problem of it
well i was reading more in depth of Ben Franklin’s guide to older women, advising young men to go for them. In that the young ones are headaches, and the older ladies are more grateful, honest, and less drama. Plus, you’re getting a good conversationalist too, and satisfying companionship all around. Also, some men dont want children, and having to deal with younger women, alot of them want children. As for the old guys salivating over the young ones, i dont know, maybe enjoying the attentions of “arm candy” which is more a reflection of him and not much of her. Like he needs attention too. baby needs.
Oops I was not intending to reply to your comment.
Those who are attached to external beauty maybe, to youth related lifestyle? Fun, party, being in love? Which aspects may indicate it? Bad Venus-Neptune contacts? Jupiter in 5th house badly aspected? Too much Libra or Leo?
Hugs!
From my experience, a lot of men do not know how to handle retirement, not aging. All of a sudden they are faced with more time than they are used to. If they don’t have interests, they lose direction a job or career gave them.
I’d say women struggle with aging, too. I do. Once you turn 40 it becomes really hard to reinvent yourself. The energy just isn’t there at the level it was in your 20’s! Get real! Mentally and physically you start to decline and FEEL it.
Women also become invisible, by and large, in their 40’s. After I lost Shiny Taurus, people kept telling me, “oh you’re young, you’ll find someone else.” Really? My looks are fading and I’m about to enter perimenopause. I wonder how many men are up for THAT challenge…..::crickets::
It’s all about perspective. I recommend Red Moon Passage book. I’m turning 50 this year and am so looking forward to the next chapter of my life. Grown children, reclaiming my space, doing MY own thing again! We have earned our wisdom wings. We know how to face challenges with resilience and grace. We are powerful beyond measure and unlike our younger versions, We know it!
Im 38. Ill be 39 in October. Im not tripping about my looks or sex appeal or viability in the dating market, but I really wanted to be more financially and emotionally stable by this age.
Im not too worried about my looks. I dont think men are as picky as we are. A smile on a forty year old will charm a man faster than a scowl on twenty yr old (if hes worth your time). So I go for happiness:) Its a win win.
I agree, Libra Noir. I’m in my mid forties and don’t feel any less viable at all. If anything my wisdom has increased my value..lol.
I feel more confident now than I did in my twenties.
Same here. I wouldnt trade what I have now in the way of confidence for a smooth face. I like the saying “youth is wasted on the young”.
I’d say men and here’s why. Most men tend to not have to deal with losing function until they get older. Where women (think in terms of bearing children) deal with this ‘losing function’ sooner, even repeatedly, during pregnancy and sometimes it continues on afterward. I’m not just talking about bladder issues, but the whole idea that, during pregnancy, your body is not just your own. You lose a bit of control over it (especially when you have a lot of medical interventions during pregnancy and/or delivery) and learning to let go, in the best interest of both you and your child, is a common lesson. I hope that makes sense, but it’s a real Broad generalization. Not all women experience this (with pregnancy or not) and certainly, there are men out there that ‘lose function’ in one way or another during their youth that prepares them a bit more for the reality of aging.
Another thought is that women tend to be more social and have more of a social structure in place, therefore seeking help or camaraderie is not something new to them. For men, some of whom have been an island to themselves during their life, this can be a real challenge.
Thanks for this. It’s an interesting theory! 🙂
You’re welcome :). Many years ago while getting my ND degree, I studied the book Women’s Book of Life by Joan Borysenko. Her breakdown of women’s age-related cycles was truly fascinating as well as helpful. I’m starting Barbara Hand Clow’s Astrology and the Rising of Kundalini (the transformative power of Saturn, Chiron & Uranus). From the intro & forward it’s lining up with both these ideas (above).
I think the “performance” ability plays a very important part in a mans psyche. Many men in their 50s start to lose this ability “good reason to stop smoking” Not every man can take a pill.
I agree with men dating younger women are trying to hold onto their youth. If he can hold onto a younger woman that is proof positive he “still has got it”
yeah i’d say both but i have noticed that alot of men do think their masculine appeal should attract all types of women. that kind of warren beatty appeal, and aging sucks because you lose your vitality. the appeal of being so adored and favoured. then there are men who depend more on their genius money making power, like hugh hefner who grow old and dont care about that cause they know they can get all the young beauties. But his genius lies in that he knows what a woman is worth and needs; he helps them make money and gives them security and shelter and make them so beautiful and proud of themselves. I think thats so brilliant of him. for women, i dont know, i dont really see alot of older women wanting alot of younger men the same way men do with younger women. id have to study more on that.
Not sure if men suffer more than women ,not sure I think too much of it .When involved with physical labor there is an ego adjustment as you age, men or women
If this is on the romantic page;for a woman my age(60)
Yes it still seems to work the same
Rewards of companionships and intimacy Huge sparkling part of time
Not sure what age we are talking
Mind over matter
I think there is an intentional
Cross off the list ,spot in time
Can’t ride wild horses anymore
Don’t want to break my back
But Snow skiing still ok
For me I need to remind myself
Of check list, yes I did do this that and the other thing ( pat on back)
But now I am doing this this and this
Ok all good changes not much you can do?
But performance anxiety at work
Huge, hate that feeling for unspoken judgement on the artistic part of work
There is this marketing young thing:(
Been told tincture called
Mellissa supreme
Takes edge off anxiety
Also been told
Aging ain’t for sissies
Work is important to most men, and so is every physical function, the loss of which freaks them out…In my experience, women are more philosophical about aging..
I tend to agree with this, in general.
I value my independence, and the idea of losing that is scary. I want to function and be able to do everything for myself without help. And I want to stay at home instead of being stuck in a hospital with outrageous medical bills.
I think the things people are saying about men wanting to sleep with younger women, sound like nonsense. Sorry. Maybe this is true for some men but I think this particular fear doesn’t usually boil down to that.