There seems a lot of interest in past lives. I have pieces of my story all over this site. This past lives deal has come a number of times over the years. I thought I’d look for something cohesive. It does not exist so I will create.
My husband and I met when we were 17 and 19 years old. He told me of one of his past lives at this time. He said he wasn’t sure but sure? Like he’s sure but allows for error? In whatever case, his story was compelling as all hell and you know me. I’m curious!
He also told of ability to travel around through time. Again, I was spellbound. Keep in mind, I had been introduced to metaphysics by, Henry. Astrology, but other arts as well. I guess you could say I was prepared to hear his tale. My husband was and is, spectacularly authoritative. There was just no way for me to hear this story and not at least consider it to be true.
But we’re still teenagers and we ran around doing what we did. We had tons of fun but occasionally he would drop his voice and talk to me about this stuff. Then one day, he brought home this poem.
The poem was printed in a small booklet, like a small prayer book. It was long and way, way, way, way, over my head. It was impossible to read so much as a line from it, without having a visceral reaction. Someone had given him the poem; someone he worked with. He told me that he thought he’d written it… that he was pretty sure he had.
I didn’t know what to do with this. My husband has Jupiter in Sagittarius, he tends to be honest. I was at a loss for words because frankly, I could not really understand the poem. This would have been due to my growing up, isolated to some degree. I will say this here: Dolce, you have the poem. I say this so at least one person knows the magnitude of what I am talking about. I trust you to maintain our privacy. My point is, I was left with a loss for words.
We spent a couple or three weeks on this. He mulled what making this tie, meant. I tried to make my brain fathom… any of it. But I was gripped, of course.
So my husband and I failed to marry, which is another story. We got back together more than twenty years later and guess what? I’m still thinking about this. I want to know if he “outgrew” this stuff.
I say that, because when I was fifteen-ish, I briefly changed me name to, “Else”, pronounced the same way – I was trying to make myself interesting. Well, that was stupid, so I dropped it in a matter of a month or so. Would he still be where he was?
We got back together and had a lot to talk about. Over the months, we did begin to touch on this stuff and then one day I remembered the poem part of this story. We have an internet, right? I decided to search… all the poems in the world, for the poem I was looking for that was about _____.
This is where it gets incredible. I found the poem, I thought. It was in a book, available on Amazon, I thought. The poem was in a book of poems, in the public domain. Someone had published it to preserve the work. I bought this book.
I was very anxious waiting for it to arrive. Did I really find it? I hope so but Capricorn said, probably not! So the book arrived and of all the things in the world, the cover had an image, also from the public domain. It was clearly and undeniably “astrological”. The image would be familiar to everyone here, but it made no sense!
It made no sense, because planets and stars are not featured in the poems. The poems are all focused on war and religion and India. I took this as a sign!
There’s another unfathomable detail. When I found this book, it was published / made available, literally days prior. I’m talking about this book being published; four or five days later, I’m out there looking for it and find it – a single poem in the middle of a book.
When I cracked the book and read the poem, I knew it was the same one he brought home that day. Better yet, I could understand it, which floored me. All that was left was for me to breech this conversation. “Hey, do you remember that poem..?”
I sat on this for a few days. Long enough to read all the poem and recognize my husband’s attitudes and also his speech. See, he frequently uses old English, and just speaks in ways that aren’t current. I was fully satisfied I had the right poem and all the poems, but that was about it. What does it MEEEEEAN? I had to talk to him.
I brought it up and he did not know what I was talking about. I don’t know what I thought about that: we were on the phone. I asked him if he wanted to hear, possibly his poem. “I think you might recognize it…” I might add here, my husband has called time, “Swiss cheesy”. Meaning there are holes in time. I know this about him, but in whatever case, I started to read the poem.. stopping to ask, “Do you recall this?”
He said he did not recall it in the moment. “Could you have written it?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“That’s what I thought.”
He then wanted to know if he shared all this with me, how could I not have married him when we were teens? Well, I was a stupid teen, among other things. We were trying to put our lives right at this time. We both felt we’d gone off track when we separated. This was part of that process which took years and is in fact, ongoing even today.
I eventually absorbed the other poems: this was not easy to do. This was the first time, I really thought I might have had a past life, because there is a poem in there, with my name. A derivative of my name, but close. “Ella” not “Elizabeth”, close.
So that’s one thing, but the pattern of interaction between the poet and the girl was so familiar. This was like recognizing the speech patterns and attitudes in the poems. I think this way about 2009 or so. I could only get so far with this.
See, I won’t make a leap in order to arrive at some favored destination. It’s like astrology. I had to test this for YEARS before I could accept and believe it. So this became sort of a life mystery. The next time I had an inkling, was in 2015. I wrote this, mentioning the second poem:
So now, this gal told me a few things… my husband is a warrior – yes. But she said I also back go to ancient times. She said I was very young and being trained as a “seer”. She said an older man was teaching me. This was akin to, Henry, in this life. She was the one who made this connection.
I also talked to her about all the people who hate me because this is another pattern. Some may recall, I met my husband’s aunt; she’s also touched in some way. She told me at that time, she’s never seen a person with so many enemies. She could not understand it… and either can I, frankly. But she also told me I had sufficient protection – massive protection. This gal told me the same thing.
My husband’s aunt gave me something “protective” to carry with me. She had the same object, given to her by a priest… sixty years, prior. She said nothing had ever happened to her.
This gal seemed to indicate when you have this kind of history, you will be looked over. It’s seems correct. I’ve certainly seen it with my husband and who else do you know, who can drive a truck, on fire, in the middle of nowhere… and run into forty fireman, all wanting to put out the fire?
She also said, a person like me and a person like her, are to provide “balance” in this messed up era. Libra heard that and I do try to do this all day, every day. Essentially, have you considered this other thing or the other person’s view or whatever? It’s quite bad out there and we all know it.
I have some more thoughts on this, but this is a decent start. I hope it’s interesting to you and perhaps opens a door for you, somehow.
I forgot to mention, she said the poems come in; channeled, so to speak. This also made a lot of sense because the poem in question registers as supernatural in some way. You just have no way of knowing how or really, why. Come through the swiss cheese, I guess.
Sounds to me like you’re a light worker (Dolores Cannon talks all about the three waves of volunteers for more info). When one shines so much light just being oneself it will trigger others around them to examine their own darkness. Most are not willing to do this, and instead they project the darkness onto the light worker. You are protected in this difficult endeavor because it’s such an important task.
Through synchronicity, we are given the information we need, exactly when we need it. These are clues to help us wake up to the truth. We are also eventually brought together with those who are similar to us, so I guess it’s no surprise I connect with so many people on this blog.
Just in the last week, I got some really cool information about my ancestral line and spiritual gifts (synchronistically one of them is being a seer, ha!). You can’t make this stuff up, it’s just so weird and awesome. I love the unfolding of the mystery personally.
I could be wrong, of course, but that’s what it sounds like to me.
Well, I have never seen myself as such. When I was young, I had voracious appetites. Mostly Mars-y 9th house. Thrill, adventure, expansion, challenge, knowledge, thirst for education. I just wanted more… cowbell, you might say. I was reckless and fun and happy and game – ready to rock, like a teenage boy!
It wasn’t until I started writing about astrology online (1999) before I realized I knew things others didn’t. I also learned my stories were unusual and people were interested in them. I had no idea. I’m usually looking ahead… not focused on the periphery. Well, I just have an enormous blind spot, which I told this woman about, plus it’s obvious.
Around 2005 or so, I realized I did have a skill for connecting people to the ethereal. I can make these concepts real and accessible in line with Chiron and the Rainbow Bridge. https://www.amazon.com/Chiron-Rainbow-Between-Llewellyns-Astrology/dp/087542094X I’ve wrote about this back then… maybe more than once. Coming to understand this, advanced me a lot. Like, “you can do this, so you should… or even, you’d better”.
That’s my husband’s voice, telling me and anyone else who will listen, if you don’t use your skills, you’ll lose them… and have to come back and do your assigned job with less skill, since you didn’t appreciate it when you had it! I do agree with him on this.
It’s only been in the last few years, I know I can see things others can’t. My ability comes from having grown up without a tv. I’m saying, this explains it to me, 100%. I’m talking about being able to freeze a giant screen tv – point to the thing and the person can’t see it. It’s not their eyes that don’t work. It’s their brain that fails, I suppose. It’s too much – they overload.
This is not true of everyone of course. Enough people can see what I see, I know I’m not crazy, but most cannot.
As of today, after talking to this gal – I accept I am in fact a “seer” of some skill because I can sure as hell see what’s placed in front of me, standing next to a person who cannot. I guess since it’s an unusual ability, so the idea I may have been at this awhile seems feasible. But what I can tell you for sure, is that growing up without a tv was a GREAT, GREAT unbelievable benefit to me. So much so, as I have said before, I would take all those beatings and everything else, to have avoided the fate others have suffered.
https://elsaelsa.com/astrology/why-is-everyone-so-messed-up/
Basically, I don’t want to miss the life that right in front of me. I will look into things. I will look into them deeply, over years and decades… and possibly over lifetimes. However, as of today, I have no personal knowledge of such a thing.
Last, as for why I have such a blind spot, perhaps it’s due to my father kicking me in the head so much. Still, I would choose it, mostly likely because this is my actual life, I am to be living. I have never wanted to be anyone else… just do my best and hope for the best. I’ve gained new perspective from this reading and intend to share it next as I think it will be beneficial for others as well.
Haha, “more cowbell.” I love your humor Elsa. I’m a double Capricorn so it took me a long time to even accept the possibility that I was a light worker. It’s just so woo-woo. But life gave me too many signs that I am, eventually I couldn’t ignore it.
We all come from the light/source so we are all lightworkers in the grand scheme. But I’ve found that some of us agreed to heal/integrate/awaken to the full truth of things a bit before the general populace to guide them through their own awakenings. Once we have found a way to heal ourselves, then other people have access to this new energetic pathway. Kind of like paving a trail so others can then follow it too.
But don’t get me wrong, it’s not like every light worker is a perfect person who has no earthly desires. I’ve made so many, let’s say “interesting” choices in my life, but it’s all good. It’s all growth. More than anything our souls just want new experiences.
I had a lot of beliefs/patterns to overcome and healing to do in my first 40 years of life in this incarnation, mainly reclaiming my personal power and creating a healthy ego from insecurity. But I made some kind of huge advancement recently (pretty sure I passed a really painful test) and it seemed to unlock something. The veil is thinner than ever for me and synchronicities abound! It seems like every hour I have new “aha“ moments. In between writing this comment and the last one I learned so much about the asteroids Pallas Athena, Vesta, and Ceres, who are all pretty significant in my natal chart and right now via transit (of course!). And yet still, it’s hard to trust that this is all real.
I believe we are here for a multitude of reasons, but as we fulfill our soul’s plan for this life on a personal level (as seen by the natal/progressed charts etc.) we also eventually step into our bigger purpose. I’ve learned that life is always “and,” never “or.” There are so many layers, and yet they all work together in such a beautiful way that it leaves me in awe. Just like nature.
The nice thing is, it doesn’t really matter if it’s “real” or not. As we evolve we help the collective evolve. Even when seen through a purely logical psychological lens. The fact that light workers are reluctant to look at ourselves as special is by design. With great power comes great responsibility; it’s all about being a positive role model – which you obviously are (“I have never wanted to be anyone else… just do my best and hope for the best”).
In the link you offered regarding why people are so messed up you illustrated exactly why we’re so needed at this time. It’s like the odds are completely stacked against kids these days, I don’t know how they to do it (specifically growing up with social media, but of course so much more). Through shedding our conditioning to the point where we are fully authentic we set the example that others can follow, if they so choose.
Ok I’d better stop now as this is getting loooong 😉 but I’m really looking forward to your next post on this, Elsa. Even if I’m delusional, it sure keeps things interesting.
I’d love to see the actual poem…regarding “seers”…I know a professional psychic, a seer if you will, and as I was nearing the end of my professional career(s), I asked her what she saw…Amongst other things, she said that she had been told that I “had done enough” for children and society, and would be protected and “taken care of”…and so it went…
I would be very interested in how, after drifting apart from your soulmate, you got back together…sometimes these things seem to be arranged by your guides….
I found him on the internet. I asked him if he remembered me and he did.
Wow! Was he amazed to see what you’d created over the years apart? Open-minded about astrology?
Well, there isn’t a single answer. I mean, we connected, but I learned he’d been expecting to see me, all his life. I’m talking about crawling into some remote town, after a mission. He cleans up, goes to a bar, expects to see me, tending it. Instead, someone walks over to the jukebox and plays a song… one of the songs he collected all his life, that he associated with me?
So he just had that experience over and over and over… then I pop up and ask, “Do you remember me?”
Astrology? Yes, he’s okay with it. Not really interested, though he read my (original) blog for three years, when we were not speaking. He looked into it, deeply, Catholically speaking. I came out okay because I don’t cross the lines that should not be crossed. Well, almost never.
That’s extraordinary!
Like an upside down Casablanca! Yet he never tried to track you down, waited for you to find him. All in God’s time.
He was and is a confident man of action…Probably not oriented toward searching for the woman he loved, maybe not certain that you loved him…so he waited for fate..
This is so fascinating!. I love hearing of past life experiences.
forget those live this one