Pining For The Love You Never Got vs Real Life Love And Relationship

I have a client struggling with Saturn aspecting her natal Venus. She would like to partner. I explained, she’s got to overcome impediments that keep her from her goal.

“Your interest in him is an impediment until and unless he comes to you which he actually may.

He MAY but only if he experiences life without you and comes to a new conclusion. If this doesn’t happen, he was just a lesson on your journey. Pining for him is like pining for 8th grade when you’re in 10th now.”

I think this a succinct message applicable to many so here it is. I hope it helps some of you off the branch you’re caught on.

Men who you are interested in you do come around once they see you’re really moving on. But even if they don’t this is not the time to cling. We have five planets going to hit Aries in April and smart people are getting to not only move but move quickly.

Are you in 10th grade, pining for 8th?

18 thoughts on “Pining For The Love You Never Got vs Real Life Love And Relationship”

  1. Yes this is good advice. “are you in the 10th grade pining for the 8th grade”. I try not to be, but it can be hard. I too have Saturn in Libra and it is in my 10th house. 🙂

  2. @So very true. Gonna be an interesting spring. Last spring I bought a pot of tulips and forgot to plant them this fall. So I just came across it this morning and the shoots are coming up already!

    Like a reminder that spring will be here b 4 we know it.

  3. This describes me perfectly right now. I broke up with my ex a year and a half ago. I was going through what I call “early-twenties existential angst” and felt as though he wasn’t being supportive. It was the type of relationship where we didn’t have much in common outside of our love and curiosity in regards to eachother. I’m still soo in love with him, but he’s moved on and it hurts alot. He wants nothing to do with me. Saturn in libra is in my seventh house. My venus is in my tenth in sagittarius. This week was rough, but I’ll survive.

  4. oh WOW ELSA a good one! JinJan said l should read it! Yeah this is the answer l kind of got in my dreams…amazing! So weird :O
    The thing is l feel l can’t have anyone who has left me coming back now for they might stop me in my flight and in the way l need to progress, just can’t have that now…the Aries thing scares me a little.
    Thank you!

  5. I know exactly what you mean Elsa..Saturn in Libra in my 10th conj. my moon. Pining for a deep, meaningful relationship seems an issue for me but it has been on my mind a lot recently..

    No matter what your age, this is GOOD advice..Thank you for the reminder!

  6. I’m in the opposite boat, I’m in 10th grade pining for 12th (moving on) yet feel pulled back to 8th by others. With jupiter aspects and all the those planets heading toward aries, all I desire is to leave/move on, etc. I feel like I’m the one being clung too :o(

  7. Yeah I woke up with discontent. No matter how many guys hit on me and dates I go on I still miss my ex from this summer. Hmph, It’s funny because when I was with him I didn’t really feel like longing to be with him…but now that he’s no longer an option I’ve been pinning. There has GOT to be a better option out there….he’s gonna spin into my life I’m sure of it.

    Time to move on – thanks for the post Elsa.

  8. As usual, a very timely post. Saturn has been squaring my Venus for a while. I feel like I’ve learned this lesson over the Venus retrograde. Interestingly enough, as soon as I decided to move on, I started getting interest from the original guy, plus other men! I am sticking to my guns and not clinging.

    I wonder if there is a way to stop attracting 8th graders in the first place.

  9. was trying to explain this to my sister yesterday… i’m always amazed by how concisely and expressively you package these concepts…

  10. thank you for this elsa! i do a lot of pining for the past…things that have been dead in the water so long the water has all but been evaporated into the atmosphere, ha!

    anyway–onwards and upwards. thanks for your help elucidating this.

  11. Yep, been there, visit there, sometimes see friends going there too! I think it isn’t all that uncommon.
    It is a lesson learned late for me that relationships do have a life-span, and that some of them are there for a learning experience. I always thought that every relationship was supposed to last forever. Rather, that ONE relationship was supposed to last forever, so I interpreted every relationship as something to hang on to and MAKE work, no matter the cost. And if it didn’t: failure, and pining, and looking backwards.
    I’m getting better at seeing the lessons the way they are. (I think.)
    But I still pine, and think, and wonder. But I think I am less likely to have the mental panic of “oh, no! doom! failure! heartbreak! disaster!” and more likely to understand a relationship as something that perhaps has a function and time-span in my development and learning as a person…. like 8th grade….

  12. That rings a bell here Ingy. After the last time, I realized the only relationship that is forever is the one with the universe and myself. The rest have their season and in time they each pass.

  13. I too have Saturn in Libra squaring my natal Venus in Libra (and natally he’s always opposed in Cancer) and it’s tough tough tough. Venus in Cap hates to give up, let go, admit that all that time and effort was wasted. Not much prospect of anything to move on to either at my age! But we must live in hope, keep busy, and try not to panic with Pluto about to transit my natal Venus as well!

  14. Interesting way to put it Elsa. As someone who has only just recently broken free of desire for someone I couldn’t have (and probably wouldn’t want to have if I could), I can totally see the logic in your advice and am going to take it with me moving forward 🙂

    Thank you.

  15. Well, at times still pining away for the Scorpio who burst my bubble last holiday season. I have Saturn in Libra in the 7th house, but it’s trining my natal Venus. Haven’t really thought about love since.

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