Red Hand Truck: Part 10 – The Scorpio

“What happened?” Scorpio asked.

“It’s a welding burn.”

He whistled. Scorpio was an engineer but he was not a one trick pony. He was like me. He could do whatever he needed to. Build a house. Boil an egg. Cut the grass. Whatever. Besides having some insight into me, he knew enough about welding to have some idea the deal here. The extreme heat involved, I mean.

“What’s the doctor say?”

“That it’s bad. He says that I will have a bad hand. He doesn’t know how bad.” I told him the little tidbit about infection and amputation and this got me another whistle.

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t figured it out.”

I told him everything I had figured out and he listened. The phone rang. It was the Capricorn welder, calling to check on me.

“Where have you been? Are you all right? I’ve been trying to call,” he said. “You’re usually home earlier than this. I’ve been worried about you all day. I shouldn’t have left you at the store. I came back and your truck was gone. I hope you went to the hospital,” he said.”

I told him I saw a doctor and my hand was burned but I thought it would be okay. I’d know more in a few days. I didn’t want him to feel bad. I didn’t want him to feel responsible. I was thinking I’d gotten myself into this and I would find my way out. It was my problem.

“What did the doctor do?”

“They took care of my hand. It’s all bandaged now and I am on pills.”

“Pills?”

“It hurts. And an antibiotic,” I said.

“It hurts? I’m sorry Elsa. Damnit, I should have picked you up and just taken you.”

“Don’t worry about it. It doesn’t hurt anymore. I have pills, I said! I’m tired though. I want to get some rest. I’m sleepy.”

“I’ll call tomorrow.”

“Okay. Thanks Capricorn. See ya. Thanks for calling.”

“I’m sorry, Elsa.”

“No need. It’ll be okay.”

Scorpio didn’t stay long after dinner. This was my preference. Like Greta Garbo, I wanted to be alone. We didn’t have an intimate relationship and I was exhausted to the nth degree. On top of that, I’d taken one of the pills and after the long day and I was fading quickly. That and I really needed to think this through.

Scorpio left telling me to call if I need anything. He said it was fine to call in the middle of the night but I knew that. He had four planets and his node in Scorpio; I knew he would will pick up first ring. He had a tractor beam on me and we both knew it. He said he’ll call in the morning and I thanked him.

I lie in bed holding my big white mitt hand with my other. I felt nothing. No pain. I tried to imagine how it was going to be with a bad hand, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t get it into my reality. How can it be this bad when I can’t feel it? Surely there has been a mistake.

I tried hard to process it. I tried to think my way down the path like this:
“Okay, so my hand is mangled and then…”

I prompted my mind like that but I got nowhere. I got a total blank. I stared at the bandages and nothing. All I could see was nothing and then the pills took me out.

Skip to Part 11 – What Happened