Annalisa writes:
“Don’t you just love when the energy comes to a head on top of everyday life? BANG. The big bang. I think that when people marry there is a change in energy that covers everyone and everything they do from there out. At least I have found that to be true. To get married is a BIG DEAL, even if you make the wedding small. Things will change forever on that day.
Do you think that too? Marriage has it’s own energy.”
I do agree with her and think traditional marriage will come back into vogue with Saturn in Libra. Her mail made me think of one of my favorite things I have ever written down. From 2007: A Billion Years…
I think I see a trend of people having marriage without the marriage. People in 2009 have been taught it’s okay to co-habitate and have kids and have a “marriage” without the legal commitment.
Not to mention people become parents at younger and younger an age – the amount of teenage pregnancies these days is staggering.
I think there’s been a dynamic shift from the “traditional family unit” to almost a “eh, whatever”.
luci, that is really interesting. Saturn traditionally is conservative which would indicate a throwback but I can imagine a scenario where there would be a SHORTAGE of partners.
It may be that this is unpredictable at this point seeing as Uranus is opposing Saturn but eventually it will move out of orb and things will clarify.
Thanks for your comment. Very provocative! 🙂
I have so many mixed feelings about marriage. On one hand, I love the traditionality (?) of marriage and all that it entails…family, togetherness, gender roles, and ever-lasting love for those that are lucky enough to marry their soul-mates (specifically the first time around, without the heartache of experiencing a divorce). I’m married and am working really hard at a successful marriage. However, if I ever divorce, I don’t imagine myself ever to get married again. For one, I enjoy solitude waaay too much, I’m stubborn and like doing things my way, and honestly I think I have too many issues to give it another go. I just would’t want to inflict my insecurities about relationships on another person again. Even if I solved all of my problems…I really like my own company. I may as well go live in a monastery.
But….I really do hope the sanctity of marriage will be more valued than it has been. Even with my sometimes jaded thoughts, I respect the institution of marriage and I wish all couples long and happy unions!
I was married 20 years this June, but my husband and I both have Saturn in Capricorn. I actually always thought that Libra in general loves being paired up, so I wonder if Saturn will make it harder somehow. I have a whole bunch of Libras in my life, so I am a little apprehensive for all of them. I don’t know, possibly harder (Saturn) to balance (Libra) the needs of both people in the marriage(?) – I hope not, I am hoping there will be a trend of being more serious about our commitments.
As someone who didn’t marry for the first time until they were 45, [though I had several long lasting monogamous live-in relationships] I believe getting married was a really big deal.
Not so much the religious side of things either but more as a way of formally announcing to your particular community/society the two of you are now a couple. I do know it changed how others with my community saw me too – big time! And then there are some pretty profound legal ramifications.
There is a very good reason I associate Saturn aspects in synastry including one person’s Saturn on the others Descendant a good indicator of a relationship with legs. Doesn’t matter if it’s a romantic relationship or a business partnership either. If it’s legally binding, it has Saturn’s fingerprints all over it!
Yup, Saturn in Libra will bring many discussions about what it means to be married all right! 🙂
Well Saturn is exalted in Libra and I think ultimately it will be very good for those who commit. I’ve been saying for months now I think those who take relationships lightly are going to find themselves out in the cold and I still think this is right but luci’s comment caught my eye and attention.
I’d add that the last time Saturn was in Libra, I was not up to this challenge and feel it cost me big time.
I’ve always thought of marriage as a social construct, and I don’t see that changing. I don’t expect that I will ever want to marry again, as I was extremely surprised that I wanted to marry my ex when I realized I did. (Is that sentence really as convoluted as it looks? *tilts head*)
Saturn in Libra will be running over my Mars-Venus-Pluto conjunction, and I’m really hoping it won’t be nearly as life-stealing as when it went over my Sun-Merc-Saturn conjunction in Leo/Virgo. This time around I’m praying for more clarity and effort, less “I’m a worthless human being, shoot me now.”
I’ve always thought that I would do well living in an arranged marriage. That is not the custom here in the U.S., but that’s just how I tend to approach it. Not too romantic, I suppose. Capricorn rules my 7th house, Cancer sun, I’ve always approached marriage in a traditional way (although I don’t extend that view to other people’s marriages). It’s one of the few traditions I actually feel close to, instead of stifled by.
Now, 13 years into my marriage, my views on marriage are getting *more* romantic. Perhaps Saturn is calling me to learn more about marriage past the steady, “gutting it out” phase. Doesn’t seem too Saturn-y, but we’ll see.
I cannot wait until that cool October day when Saturn goes into Libra.
I bet all you mutables feel the same?
Aw… ‘the billion years’ gave me the chills made my hair stand up all over my body. (which means it’s a ‘truth’) That’s SO sweet.
I think you guys are a pair of Plato’s “split aparts”. Maybe that’s what Saturn in Libra represents?
As a Neptune in Libra on my midheaen, I don’t have patience (G) and it makes me nervous.
I’ve always thought that marriage was a big deal, and I do think that I believed this when I got married, but looking back, I think there was still a huge amount of immaturity on my part about all that it entailed.
Getting divorced, though completely my decision/fault, was VERY eye opening and has taught me a lot!
Lately, I’ve had to take a look at my relationship patterns and I’ve had to take examine what commitment means to me. I have made a LOOOOOTTTT of mistakes out of my immaturity/selfishness/insecurities but now I feel like I have a more sober and realistic outlook on relationships.
I’m approaching my Saturn Return and now I feel like I know what the hell I need to do! I realize the seriousness of commitment and I am willing to compromise and do the work it needs to make it through.
I’ve always thought that marriage was a big deal, and I do think that I believed this when I got married, but looking back, I think there was still a huge amount of immaturity on my part about all that it entailed.
Getting divorced, though completely my decision/fault, was VERY eye opening and has taught me a lot!
Lately, I’ve had to take a look at my relationship patterns and I’ve had to take examine what commitment means to me. I have made a LOOOOOTTTT of mistakes out of my immaturity/selfishness/insecurities but now I feel like I have a more sober and realistic outlook on relationships.
I’m approaching my Saturn Return and now I feel like I know what the hell I need to do! I realize the seriousness of commitment and I am willing to compromise and do the work it needs to make it through.
Oops…forgot to say great post! Looking forward to your next one.
I hope that any push toward conservatism doesn’t affect gay marriage.
When my husband and I started our relationship we were friends. I didn’t want to date. I was fine being friends. Finally he convinced me to date him. When we decided over time that we both loved each other and this was a forever thing, we were good. We were together six years before we married. Our marriage was nothing more than a show for our family. In fact we eloped with just our parents, grandparents, and closest friends. Nothing has changed between us. Around us, yes, because our families now accept that we are together. I find it sad that it took a judge and a piece of paper for them to see that we love each other and we are eternal togther.
The diamond market is coming back very strongly and I think this will continue.
“I’ve been saying for months now I think those who take relationships lightly are going to find themselves out in the cold…”
FINALLY someone points this out. Hallelujah. I’ve got a 1st house Capricorn Venus trine Taurus Moon, conjunct Capricorn Neptune, and sextile Scorpio Mars and Pluto. I don’t take relationships lightly. I don’t take any emotions lightly, for that matter (Mars/Pluto conjunction opposite my Moon haha) and I hate hate hate when people just play around with relationships. I’ve got vulnerability issues, so it takes a lot for me to admit how I’m really feeling. You can see that dynamic with the Mars/Pluto opposition to my Moon. Don’t take people’s emotions as a game. There’s no game about it. I believe in being responsible in love and relationships. Responsible for your behavior, and having a responsible partner to be with in general. If you can’t show me that, I’m out. D-O-N-E. Don’t come back, there’s nothing left here. Trust me. I’m a powerhouse of emotion (in a little body) and if you get to see this, you’d better not abuse it. 🙂 So I’m pretty happy about Saturn going into Libra. Balance, responsibility, real love. Yay. I’ve also got a loose conjunction of Venus/Uranus (in Sag) so I believe that relationships can be unpredictable, but stable at the same time. I don’t think they always have to be so serious, the actual interaction within a relationship can be light and fun… But the relationship itself should be built on a strong foundation.
Big smiles here!
…Oh, and I see marriage as a very serious commitment that should never be taken lightly. That’s another person’s life (the good and the bad) merging completely with yours. Maybe it’s because I’ve been surrounded by major relationship shocks/seeing relationships built on weak foundations and crumbling all around me this year… None of my own, but with the depth I feel things from close friends, they may as well have been… But now more than ever, I see it as something sacred.
I highly doubt this view will ever shift. It is ingrained into who I am. Of course, there are situations where it can’t be avoided and two must separate, but don’t just think you can “take the easy way out.” No, you got yourself in, work at keeping yourself in.
Yes, I think marriage has it’s own energy. There are so many dimensions to it. I have been lucky, blessed really, we married young and as fate would have it we are very compatible. We were married last time Saturn was in Libra, conjunct Jupiter at 4 degrees.
Well, I am 50, and I am gay (and always knew I was).
This means I grew up and spent the better part of my adult life not being allowed to marry the person I love and thinking this would never be a possibility in my lifetime.
Then one day, it became possible, almost out of the blue, in my country.
I must admit I have ambivalent thoughts and feelings about the matter.
I do believe in, and desire, a lifelong relationship, have no problem with commitment (actually need and seek it) and am “engaged to be married”, but I don’t know yet what form that “marriage” will take.
Let me ask you something, SF. If you have to ask if you are gay, are you most likely not gay?
“I can imagine a scenario where there would be a SHORTAGE of partners.”
Oh, that’s already happened!
i can see it… at weddings… they’re pretty powerful events. soemthing about formally promising to spend you life with a partner, in front of a bunch of people who matter to you… huge.
it’s a formal personal commitment. i think it fundamentally alters the nature of the connection, on some level. it is, in a very real sense, a binding. which is why i think some people avoid it. you better be real sure that you want to stay stuck with whomever you’re bound.
but i also think that making a vow marks your soul, in some way. people don’t seem to care about such things so much, any more.
vast difference between a ring with a diamond in it
and a diamond ring
I’ve never been interested in getting married but suddenly started seriously thinking about it a few months ago. Since I’m single, I can only assume I’m tuning into something current.
“Let me ask you something, SF. If you have to ask if you are gay, are you most likely not gay?”
Huh?
(just saw this, don’t understand)
I routinely get mail from young women (and occasionally men) who are afraid they may be gay. You wrote that you always knew you were gay… everyone gay that I know says the same thing.
This leads me to wonder if a person who has to ask, “am I gay?” is likely to NOT be gay since gay people seem to know they are gay the same way I know I am heterosexual.
Ah, got it. Started answering, but will run longer than anticipated, and need to do something else first, so will come back and pick this up in a fresh thread.
Thanks for clarifying your question.
I would think that this question may rather arise from a lack of security towards their family, pairs, etc. who might have rejected them by questioning their sexuality.
Usually there is a report of some faint liking of the same sex along with attraction to the opposite sex. I think very few of the people who have to ask this question are actually gay but I am checking it out because I do get mail like this all the time. There is always a lot of fear and I’m not kidding everyone gay I know knows they are gay the way I know I am het. But this did not mean I was no enamored of Sheila in 3rd grade or I did not look up to this other gal in 5th grade, see? But in my family it would have been okay to be gay so I did not have to suffer fears and could just evolve to my sexuality.
we should move this to the boards so that it is searchable… if anyone has the inclination to cut and paste. I am out of gas myself.
will do
I seriously think that the whole idea of marriage is going to be analyzed by society via public events, and this will lead to people actually thinking DEEPLY about what marriage is. This has already been happening this summer given the gabillion sex scandals, etc. that have occurred, and these couples’ and society’s reactions to such. Uranus opposing and Pluto squaring Saturn in Libra, I think, will only bring to light the real and deeper concepts and principles behind marriage.
Marriage itself, as a legal/societal contract is actually only about finance/assets (which include children) and home security in EVERY culture here on earth. It is also an institution based on extreme sexual inequality, that still exits today even in modern cultures. If women in most cultures were always allowed the financial capability and freedom of men, marriage would be a whole different animal (if alive at all). Even if birth control didn’t exist IMO.
Truth is marriage isn’t about love, or strength of emotional bond. It’s a contract that ties one to another’s assets in order to insure material security continues through ones and ones children’s life (until the latter can fend for themselves). That seems all great except for the fact that it many a times it literally forces one partner around whether or not they want to (in abusive, loveless, and/or sexless relationships for example).
So instead of a person being there because of love, strength of emotional bond, respect, friendship, compassion ( OR ANY TRUE STRENGTH of their COMMITMENT or RESPONSIBILITY TO THEIR RELATIONSHIP) and everything good in the world, many a times the person is only there because of money, or fear of losing such.
Think about it. How many of us have friends that have been there in sickness and health, through the good and the bad, giving their all, who have never betrayed us or left us on our own? Who have cared for our kids, given us money, given us their sweat, blood and tears. Do they have a written contract with us? Did they take a vow in front of others? No, their contract is an emotional one.
This is why Libra is quincunx Pisces. Love is one thing marriage is another. Marriage is an airy, materialistic, vain, concept that is obsessed with social approval (what other people think) rather than the deep soul, emotional bond of love. Sure one can have both but the test of true love is if it is there regardless of money, age, class, a legally binding and financially implicit contract, or what other people think.
That’s the true strength of a relationship.
I find dissidentearthling’s opinion to be one that’s really spread amongst people, and I find it so disheartening. 🙁
My Venus is in Gemini, conjunct my Moon, sextile Jupiter, trine Pluto and square Mars. It’s at the beginning of the 8th house.. and I don’t take romantic relationships lightly, at all (or my friendships really – those that are closer/deeper). I think that marriage is a very big deal – I know it would be for me. I was touched by something a young woman I know online (not well, but through discussion of astrological aspects, and a bit of joking around), recently said, when talking about a friend of hers who seems to be in love with her. She was talking about her husband, and stated that she’s *his*. This is an independent woman, who is very much in love with her husband, and the same goes for him, from what she’s written in the past. That’s what I want for myself, but I’m not sure that I’m going to get it.
OOps. Not only was I caught by the spam filer, I didn’t log out of the boards. I usually post with my name…