Seeking A Durable Marriage For The New Normal

old couple loveAs life unfolds, circa 2023, things that no one could have expected have come to be.  We’ve have various events, leading us to the new normal, the newer normal, the newest normal or whatever normal comes next. Suffice to say, most are seeing things they never imagined and many are rather shocked at how they’ve wound up.

It’s enough to change your values! Values are Venus-ruled. Uranus is in Venus-ruled Taurus.  See? We’re right on schedule.

I head a new term today: “durable marriage”. I don’t think many would have been interested in such a thing, five years ago. Things change… or maybe they ’round and ’round. In whatever case, people are quickly losing interest in investing energy of any kind into something or someone who is flaky.

We all know that bad things happen at this point.  The last thing you want is a spouse who hightails it at the first sign of trouble, or rather, at any sign of trouble.  Character matters in ways for reasons I have not seen in a very long time.

This illustrates why Saturn is exalted in Libra.  We want our love to last.  We want to rely on our partner for support.

Have your values changed with Uranus in Taurus? How do you feel about the concept of a “durable marriage”?

15 thoughts on “Seeking A Durable Marriage For The New Normal”

  1. “People are quickly losing interest in investing energy of any kind into something or someone who is flaky.”


    1. Spot on! Begs the question, why was it tolerated in the first place 😂

      I think the new newer newest normal will step up, once Pluto enters Aquarius, given its the sign that Uranus rules (co-ruled by Saturn). Steadfast and stalwart (Taurus themes) may be the new LBD! We’ve been so used to flaky for so long, it will almost be a novelty.

  2. Avatar
    Anette Bjerregård

    I met my partner in 2019, and from 2020 it was fast forward to being sick with stress, quitting my job, corona, full blown anxiety, an ADHD diagnosis and assesment, medication – and now my partner has an ADHD diagnosis as well.

    Both he and I have had plenty of opportunities to flee or balk or whatever, but for some reason we grew together, going through it all.
    It hasn’t been the east way, but Saturn is in our composite 8th house (like he is in my natal, conjunct Pluto), and we seem to be better together than apart.

    I would say, that our relationship have appeared to be – or have developed into – a pretty durable bond. It feels like we’re one of those couples that fight together and stay together. Apparently we don’t do easy. But we have a double whammy of Saturn/Venus contacts in our synastry, sextile and Trine, so I guess it it one of those relationships where the more you fight together, the better you become…. Just like all the Saturn Contacts. So much has had to be overcome, and so much will have to be in the future, but I think we have proven the “for worse” part of the marriage ritual speech 😉

    I do look forward to the “for better” part though….

    1. Good story, Annette. Fighting the good fight along with true grit have been necessary fuel for the marriage in my case, too. I love the watercolor for this post, it’s that old fashioned together I’ve come to appreciate and depend upon
      The working at it and staying even as you lose your teeth and your partner blends your dinner so you can be fed kind of endurance

  3. I listened to this TED talk last night about the longest running study of human happiness and what was discovered about what really made people feel that they were living happy & meaningful lives and the the answer was simply relationships in all their forms: friendships, worker related , tennis groups, marriage partners etc.

    in fact, the quality of relationship had more bearing on whether someone would live long than thewir cholesterol at age 50!

    The most important thing waS Having a relationship that could be reliably called upon. And this didn’t mean that a couple didn’t fight and scream. It was just knowing that the person could be relied upon to be there and show up.

    Oddly enough, milleninaLS when surveyed thought the most imortant thing waS MONEY. (80%!)

  4. Pluto is approaching natal Venus at 1st degree Aquarius, at the same time Saturn is approaching my Sun at 1st degree Pisces. This year will be real test for harsh aspects. Saturn will pass pretty soon but that Pluto is going to stay long time..

  5. Lost my husband exactly one month after uranus entered taurus. A stable companion would be nice. I am not sure about being married though. I guess that’s where the flakiness comes in.

  6. Both my husband and myself have natal Saturn in Libra. We met and married when Uranus was in Scorpio. Currently Uranus is past the opposition of our meeting and not yet to opposition of our marriage date. We’ve endured, but we’ve had it easy, too.

  7. Elsa, I really do like how some of your posts gets me pondering for days! For this one, the part about not tolerating flakiness.

    I spent a lot of time wondering which transit brought in a tendency for flakiness in dating and relationships in recent years.

    Pluto in Capricorn? No, Capricorn is far too diligent, determined, and thorough for flakiness. Maybe Pluto Capricorn brought obstacles and barriers in forming committed relationships, but …. Then it hit me.

    NEPTUNE IN PISCES!! Since 2011 when it entered. I’ve noticed those who were single/got divorced around that time, have really struggled with dating & relationships. Flakiness becoming the main issue that presented itself. Almost at mass ADHD-like levels (not meant to offend here)

    Ghosting became far too commonplace. Neptune rules disappearances, it’s vaporous, literally ghostly, elusive, impossible to grasp. It became the norm to either cancel for the most flimsiest of reasons, or literally vanish off the face of the earth altogether.

    And talking of impossible, it set the bar far too high. Neptune in Pisces would set the ideals of perfection (polar opposite Virgo) to extremely unrealistic and almost deluded levels.

    And that spilt over to relationships (Men: you’re not getting a supermodel. Women: you’re not getting a billionaire. Give up now lol)

    So Elsa, could you please consider the above … and what Saturn in Pisces may do to counteract the Neptunian flakiness we’ve been living in and probably only just vaguely noticed? I would love to see an article from you 🙂

    I have a feeling the reality chickens will come home to roost when Saturn arrives. And those chickens have sharp talons!

  8. And to further my point about Neptune Pisces, the first initial ingress was from April 2011 to August 2011.

    The first book in the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy was released in June 2011.

    Neptune re-entered Pisces in February 2012 for a much longer stay. The next two Fifty Shades books were released in April 2012.

    You would have to be under a seriously damaging Neptunian delusion to consider them “the works of literary genius” 😂😂

    But I wonder if it also set the tone for relationships too.

  9. I’m in my marriage for the long haul. We’ve had some tough times here and there. I wanted to place blame outside of myself but that never helps, at least not with a spouse who is a good person (abusive relationships are different).

    Crazy but I happened across something called “fascinating womanhood” and I would have laughed at it years ago, but the things I’m learning as I take 10 minute looks into it really do help with long term relationships. The biggest thing they say is “accept your husband for who he is.” Isn’t that a lesson to learn? Then tell him what you like about him, and focus on being a better wife. It really does remove the bitterness if you’re open to it. I had some things I could work on, little things that crept in here and there, and I didn’t even realize. So I’m making some changes. Just because you’re married and expect someone to stick around forever doesn’t mean you should get lazy. Then the long haul is a nice ride.

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