One of the reasons I fight these issues around, Vid is I think the quality of his life depends on it. I am pretty sure he agrees with me although this is still very harsh in practice.
Vid has his Sun conjunct Saturn. This means he has to earn his self esteem. I think this is true for all but certainly true for Sun conjunct Saturn.
The Sun = Leo = Shine = Gold. Sun conjunct Saturn can shine like gold if they earn their self esteem. Otherwise they shine like fool’s gold, see?
If they get their self esteem by oppressing others or judging them harshly? No good.
If they earn their self esteem by cheating or cutting corners in any way? No good.
The only path to a solid sense of self for Sun Saturn is one of uncompromised integrity so based on this, I can’t let Vid’s father do his homework and call it “being supportive”. I don’t think that is support, I think it’s oppression and I have an example.
Vid is from a family of writers and has inherited aptitude. He is well advised to hone his natural talent so when I found out his dad was “helping him” write his book reports, I had to squawk.
Vid also has natural physical abilities so I put him karate four years ago where he thrived. His dad took him out after convincing him it was a waste of time, something he didn’t need, too much work, etc.
3 years later Vid opted to go back after dreaming of fighting.
“You will never be able to fight if you don’t train,” I said. “If you admire people with fighting skills you are going to have to go get some of your own, there is no other way.”
I feel very strongly I have to push my son to achieve because if I don’t and if he doesn’t, he is going to be a very burdened (Saturn) person who will burden others. He will be burdened looking for someone to judge for one thing. Judge harshly so that he shines in comparison and that’s just the beginning of the nasty manifestations.
I tell my son that we feel good about ourselves because we work hard to the best of our abilities and this is the only method that will lead you somewhere. Maybe next time he’ll be born with an instant ticket to the top but he’s not got those cards this time.
Sun Saturn is tasked with building their ego up from nothing and in spite of oppression. If they do this, things go well. If they fail they’ve got to spend the rest of their lives tossing wet blankets (Saturn) on other people’s egos and shine (Sun) so others can be as miserable as they are.
One thing I notice is anyone who has earned their self esteem NEVER, EVER impedes another person trying to earn theirs. If you want to come up with a hallmark of a person with character, that right there should serve.
Who can relate?
Thank you for this Elsa. My stepson is sun/Saturn (conjunct my sun!) and I know he has this lesson to learn. His mom is a Libra who needs to be the favorite parent desperately and dad feels guilty for his limited time with him. The task of breaking it down to harsh reality often falls to me. Mom and dad are both well intended and are not totally blind in this but it is a struggle for all to make this child face reality in a way that is empowering.
I have struggled with this dynamic since I met John and I think reading this and all of your other posts about Saturn finally made it click. The solution to my sun/Saturn stepparent relationship is time+effort. I have always known this but I think now I KNOW it. Know what I mean? 🙂
Lucy, you’re right. They will feel lowly and may not oppress others, however in my son’s case he is being trained to this which is why I fight. You simply cannot get *real self esteem by putting other people down.
That’s not me, BTW!
I have struggled with this conjunction my whole life….knowing inside myself what was true to me, but others telling me otherwise and fighting me…..but I cannot stop what my soul tells me…I am a hard worker and have earned every bit of esteem I may have, which sometimes, being a Capricorn seems minimal compared to others. The truer I am to myself, the better I am….even if it is the hard way. I know you are doing the right thing by your son and good for you!!
oh man can I ever relate!
My own good work and integrity is the one thing no one can ever take from me, so I better have something to show for myself. I feel that one very deeply.
denamaria my ex has Sun/Saturn conjunct in Capricorn and has integrity in spades. what you wrote…the words could’ve come from his mouth.
One thing I notice is anyone who has earned their self esteem NEVER, EVER impedes another person trying to earn theirs.
Sun sq Saturn here. My siblings & I grew up having to work very hard on the family farm. At the time I hated it but it gave me a solid sense of self esteem for sure. There were very few times I felt the need to prove myself to others because of my upbringing.
Vid is very fortunate in his mom . . . 🙂
I’ve got a first house sun/saturn/ascendant pileup. I used to get so frustrated with my dad for pushing me so damn hard to be the best at everything I did.
Now? I’m glad he did. And in true Sun/Saturn form, I’m harder on myself than anyone else can be. But I excel, damn it.
Elsa, You tend to always bring up things I think about. I too have this conjunction.(in the 1st house 10degrees away from my ascendant)
I have to FORCE myself to keep my self esteem up, I have to work harder then anyone around me and I fight viciously with not getting depressed. I never had a communicative and emotionally supportive Mom like you and she was a Capricorn.(My Bio. father a Scorpio Haha life is cruel) That’s great that you can start early on Vid and give him that structure so he is not fighting with his self worth. He sounds lovely and very fair..
I think the urge to squash other people is there because the sun-saturn person feels like its what the universe has been doing to them their whole life. Its not right but man, do I understand that feeling. Sometimes sun-saturn just desperately wants to be the squash-er and not the squash-ee.
I have to earn my self-esteem just like Vid! I remember my parents having this conflinct for helping me or not!
It took me many years to realise that my fear of failure was holding me back. I am building my self esteem slowly by honoring the Capricorn traits of patience,self dicipline and working hard.
But I dont have Sun conj. Saturn ! Maybe is Saturn near the Midheaven
Saturn conjunct MC,Uranus and Mercury
square Asc,Mars,Jupiter
Oh, Sun-Saturn, how I love you! *snarl*
Had self esteem, got it “beat” out of me, regained self esteem, completely lost my self esteem, saw the smallest sliver of it coming back, then was thrown for the biggest loop of my life and it sank to subterranean levels. Slowly but surely I’m building it back up again, although at times I can’t figure out for the life of me why since I can expect it to be shattered again. Egads!
I have to say, though, that I’ve never really torn others down to make myself feel better. I may not agree with someone’s life or choices, but that’s their bag, baybee. I gotsta look after my own.
Sun-Merc in Leo conjunct Saturn in Virgo, currently getting thrown about by Jupiter-Neptune-Chiron sitting precisely opposite for a bit.
Yes, I know exactly what you’re talking about- for me a saturn transit to my sun (and saturn and mercury) in virgo is doing the same. Vid is lucky to have you.
sun-saturn and I can relate;
I have been very hard on myself, in order to get wider perspectives,
but I’m realising now the job I did is massive: I’m my own boss and I do what I dreamed an what I did sweat for.
And my next dream is to pass this to others: for me art was and is the way for knowledge and growth and healing.
If I didn’t have that I would have been stucked with myself my fears and my preconception
I guess the key is he learns to not oppress others OR himself but to support himself and others.
Wow, this is a very powerful piece. Definitely elaborates on the good and the bad.
I can’t recall my evil aunt and uncle’s birth years to look them up, but I am now wondering if they are both Sun/Saturns because they LOVE to put everyone else down and act like the sun shines out of their asses. This would explain a lot about them….
if you’re solid, it’s harder for other people to push you…
which is another way of taking actual control…
I have sun conjunct saturn in my 1st house. I am critical of myself. But I wonder is it inherent, or because despite my best efforts I often fail to achieve ‘the mark’! I do think I can work hard do better and so on so forth, then I currently manage. So in that case, I do not seem to have self esteem issues, just issues with “progress”.
I HATE SATURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!–SUN CONJUNCT SATURN IN SCORPIO–2ND DECAN VIRGO RISING–MARS IN CAPRICORN–JUPITER IN CAPRICORN…I HATE SATURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have Saturn conj. my sun on my 7th/8th house cusp in Taurus. I can not catch a break at all. When others glide along I get slammed hard. Yet, I also have great luck when others are being hit hard by change on a global scale. When there unemployed or are sick I am fine.
I do not judge others or act as a wet blanket. I am the person who helps others work out chaos in there life. I think outside of normal bounds.
I have a trowler shape in my chart that sets me up for instant diplomat roles. Hillary Clintons chart has one too. My sun Saturn sees me involved in groups to help those less fortunate or without hope. Mercury is on the cusp of my 6th and 7th.
I have had people call me a jerk,self centered or cold but I don’t buy it. I am all about being fair. Rules are rules and if I break one, no matter how small, this conj. gets the book thrown at me. Every fault I have seems to be on display!
Vid will need to let a lot of peoples opinions roll off his back. When he helps people he can not expect any thanks. When you only shine at times of pain for others you get blamed for there misfortune. He must be his own light because few will give him any room.
Hi,
I have sun and Saturn in 9th house where virgo sign present tell me …always bad luck.any benifits of this connection?
Mahesh
my friend has this aspect and other squares and oppositions in the fifth in the chart and finds it very hard not to sink into self loathing and sadness. In order to work at it he has to be given opportunity by others. I’ve tried to help find a positive manifestation and I know it can be found but I don’t know how. My friend sometimes is disheartened deeply
What’s the difference between the opposition and the conjunction? I think I understand the first one but my 4 year old niece has the conjunction so I don’t know…
Wouldn’t this apply to Saturn in Leo or Sun in the 10th house? I have both.