I have completely quit complaining. It was a conscious decision made for due to logic. I don’t feel complaining will do any good!
I’m simultaneously lowered my expectations to nothing. This also seemed prudent.
A lot of this is tied to medical stuff. For example, they ignore HIPAA laws here. When a doctor informed a man that he had a spot on his lung in his x-ray…that he should contact his primary care doc to check on it, I was sitting 24″ away. His wife was with him. Did she just learn her husband has cancer? Maybe. I don’t think I should have been present for that.
I’m used to it now. Receptionists shouting our diagnoses and or medications. “ARE YOU HERE FOR THAT BOIL ON YOUR BUTT?” “ARE YOU STILL TAKING, X, Y and Z?”
Seriously, it’s that bad. So am I going to take this on? I’m not!
One big reason I won’t take it on, is I’m a strong Jupiterian. I go native, fast, basically. This is just how it is here. No is being singled out. Everyone’s privacy is violated and guess what? We have no privacy anyway, do we?
It’s the same with poor service or rudeness or whatever. SO WHAT? I remember a day I used to care about such things but my days of trying to control or police others are done.
So now, when the nurse paints the neck of my blouse with antiseptic, I act like it’s normal. And when I tell her I’m phenomenally dizzy, when I stand up after having four needles stuck in my neck, and she fails to reach to steady me, when I tip, violently, swinging over to correct my balance so I don’t fall and break my neck – well that’s normal too. Because I just don’t feel like investing time and energy into something like this.
This may very well track to Saturn’s transit through Scorpio. I’ve really learned to pull my horns in. Very few people / things are worth messing with, when you get right down to it.
The antiseptic came out of my blouse with some spray-and-wash. So really, who cares?
What’s important is that they kill this nerve in my neck. If I play my cards right, this will be done next month. I’ve been waiting since November; I think I have my priorities straight.
Have you ever experimented with taking whatever comes and rolling with it? It seems to be going pretty well.
This is also associated with Saturn in Sagittarius which teaches you have free will. I freely choose to ignore these things. I choose B, or C or whatever it is. And it feels GOOD.
I can relate to this to a degree. I think at some point you realize that although you have every right to your anger, if it dominates your every thought, and spills over into every interaction, no matter how justified, it will make a constant wreck of you. Then there’s no energy left to feel good about anything.
Yep. Might put that on my wall hehe
I agree, what are you gonna do about it anyway? I have Saturn in sag natally, and I am usually thinking of other things I will do after this encounter or planning future things…which means I’m not really in the moment or paying a lot of attention (pisces sun) anyway, so it doesn’t bother me too much. I move on.
Have I ever. I haven’t really been given a choice. I will get physical pain symptoms and be in agony. So I roll. And I roll. And, honestly, I’m finding relief, freedom, and peace in that.
I am just trying to let everything go. What’s the point of getting angry? Angry makes you think you can do something about a situation, and I can’t do anything about those situations. It’s time to just lie down and take it as it is, as a fact of life.
“…Taking whatever comes and roll with it..” Love that, Elsa. It’s my path to learn that lesson, I can see it so clearly. That doesn’t mean it’s easy, though…in fact, it’s quite hard at times <3 🙂
I’m saturn conjunction sun in Sag
I made a similar decision many years ago.i will vent at times for sure but I would not be described as a complainer as friends have confirmed. I usually am too busy fixing stuff
I have found that if I start to compulsively complain around any given person, it’s usually because I’m angry at said person for something I consider unforgivable and am done with the association anyway. Utterly passive-aggressive, I know, but it does very effectively cut the cord.
Playing devil’s advocate about complaining for a second, I have to say I still have quite a few days where I would much rather brood and sulk and rage at the world alone than spend time with a happy positive person. It’s just more satisfying until my mood changes.
Depends, I will have had to hit some pivot point in my emotions. Like if I have been blowing off steam/purging anger for twenty years. It’s easier to stop twenty years in, then stop two years in. Depends on how much intensity I have in me, hopefully that intensity isn’t poison.
I agree, it probably will feel really good to come to that point. But I’m not sure that point can be fully forced.
Always see Gemini as the planet which goes native quickly, (being chameleon-like) deftly adapting to situations. Sagittarius bluntly points out things in a righteous way in an effort to improve/help. I guess Saturn transiting Sag mutes this tendency.
Welcome, Saggie. 🙂
I understand what you say here. Still i feel the pain for the bad behaviour.
It is a complete lack of basic love and respect!!
I so agree with you Elsa, but, it is SO very sad that we are living in an age where it seems people working in the service areas just don’t seem to care 🙁 I think it stems from a bigger picture that “life” is just so difficult for most….people are overworked, tired, depressed and getting poorer by the minute:( I think we have to let go of alot as you say or we would constantly be using every ounce of our energy in areas where it won’t change anything anyway….We need to use that energy we have to make our own world and the world around us the best it can be:)Sending love and light into the world!!
I agree. And I think I’m at a point in life where I can do the most good by setting an example.
It’s very important to be forgiving. If you hold everyone accountable for every little thing all the time, what you are in unforgiving and that doesn’t seem such a good thing.
I agree so much Elsa! Forgiveness is all. But its hard! I like my grudges. I never realized how much I have a taste for vengeance! Little old, book-worm me!
Just a longing for justice or recognition of how *I’ve* suffered. But here’s the truth. To use internet slang:
No 1 curr! (i.e. No one cares)
So I just sing the ‘Elsa’ song from ‘Frozen’ and work on ‘Letting it go’ and forgiving the wider universe 🙂
My solutions were do something about it or walk away. I’ve had to walk away from more unsolvable situations than I can count.
I’m very strongly Cardinal when it comes to relating – my Moon and Jupiter are widely conjunct in Libra, and Jupiter is exactly opposite my Rising. I spent years either complaining about bad behavior or lecturing the offenders! It never worked. People don’t want to change what works for them, even if it’s to most others’ detriment. Once I *got* that, I walked away.
Maybe it’s a landmark we’re ‘over the hill’ attitude adjustment. Pain is such a subjective experience, expression comes out sounding like self righteousness. The world belongs to them now, immersed in their subjective perceptions of the world so I ditto what you say; only way to tolerate and be tolerated is by lowering the bar.
Wonderful blog today. My sister’s favorite expression: Expect nothing and you won’t be disappointed.
I moved to a foreign country where people are horribly selfish and rude everywhere you go, and I have been keeping it in for a LONG time, but just recently, I have decided to let myself get angry, to raise my voice, to protest the insanity and illegality of it all. I was getting too depressed holding it in. I’m also thinking that if I don’t find the silver lining in this all too negative environment, that I must draw a line in the sand, where I will just pack it in if it doesn’t get any better.
My significant other has Sun cj Mars sq Pluto, trine Saturn Rx (Virgo 12): when he drives, he is always impatient to get ahead of others and constantly comments about how others drive (negatively). This has helped me see how ridiculous it is to even imagine we can control others or how they live their lives or even drive a car. Look, if I saw some driver who appeared impaired, yes, I would contact the police, but short of applying that kind of common sense, I have realized life will take you wherever it’s going, and you can go kicking and screaming or just relax and watch the world go by. No choice.
agree temporarily -‘sometimes you just gotta enjoy the war..’. i used to call out to cyclists dangerously riding on the road over bridges with a double yellow line, forcing the car to overtake them and crash with an oncoming car – a neighbour was killed from the head on crash on a small suburban bridge road like that, but now i conserve energy and yes, too tired to caution – late degree sag sun / merc with saturn transitting soon.Minding my own business seems best. But my partner was in hospital where he had to show a nurse how to tie a bandage, crazy. At some point you have to protect yourself from other’s low standards and withdraw to somewhere sane.
Welcome, rk. I can see it coming to that – the bandage thing.
Seems to me we put up as much fight as we have the energy for….That is until we realize there are more fun and productive ways to spend our time and energy.
Welcome, lekawa. 🙂 I agree to an extent. But some people may fight / defend by reflex. So for some, this has got to be a conscious decision.
Good plan. I am not my thoughts. I am not my feelings (come from thoughts). Watch em come and watch em go. Why do I sometimes expect the universe to answer to me? Must be leftovers from God Training.
I couldn’t post the picture here for some reason, but I have a big ol’ picture on my desktop of the back end of a RAT. It says “I’m all out of fucks to give, but here’s a rat’s ass”.
I thought it was just because I was getting too old to get cranked up about stuff. I mean, seriously, the small stuff is just infinitesimal now.
I really gave this post a lot of thought. I believe I made it through the entire day without getting mad once. On a Monday of all things. What I learned was some compassion for one person that usually makes me mad, and that there are some people I just really don’t like. I also need to have more tolerance with people not understanding something.
Good idea. Because you’re going to be meeting legions of people like that in the future.
I don’t know really. Sometimes I have a feeling that people are just testing to see how far they can go with their negligence, carelessness, inconsiderateness, bad manners, etc. So, although it is often, as you say, prudent to lower your expectations in ‘small’ matters, this is saying OK to low standards in everything.
I have experimented with it and ultimately failed because I deserve better. I think you deserved to be assisted when you were dizzy at the doctor’s ofc., too, Elsa. Sometimes people are just dense and they don’t mean to be horrible. But sometimes they really need a swift kick. Signed Miss Aries.