Why Am I Socially And Romantically Desolate?

sagittarius vintage girlHi, Elsa

I am having trouble in love and with friendships. I am super friendly but struggle to recognize if the other is actually a friend or an acquaintance. Then I often get awkward and don’t really know how to act if they are the latter and wish I hadn’t given so much of myself away initially.

I have been dating a Gemini. I am devastated but think I must walk away because he limits our time together and can not be there like I want him to. He is friend-zoning me but misses my touch and likes feeling loved… every time we try to hang as friends we just sleep together.  I have so much affection for him and we get on so well I want him in my life. I often feel isolated and don’t feel like I can trust anyone.

I live in a big city and wonder if moving out to a more natural part of the world could help me feel more at peace and less wrapped up in my seemingly inept social skills.

Unclear in Australia

Hi, Unclear.

First, don’t give up hope!  You’ve presented a number of issues. Each of them are resolvable.  You just need a map.

First, you do have a tendency to sacrifice yourself.   It’s up to you to find a healthy way of expressing this side of yourself. Clearly, being a doormat for one man in particular doesn’t satisfy!

Secondly, you’re very smart and potentially effective. It’s up to you to choose wisely.  You know you need to ditch this man who will use you for sex as long as you allow it.  You don’t have a common goal, so you’re not going to get anywhere with him. Use your Mars in Aries. Cut the tie so you can fish another line.

Once you’re clear, resolve to be more discerning. You have the raw info. You know you are jumping into things to quickly, so SLOW DOWN.  If you change your methods, you’ll get different results.  This is no different than changing you diet, to change your body shape.

Last, your idea about moving outside the city may have some merit. You’re a Sagittarius with a 9th house moon.  The open space would probably suit you and things do move slower in the country.   Just be sure you don’t take your problems with you.  Move because you want sweeping change in your life (positive, upbeat), as opposed to moving because you believe something is wrong with you.

Have a question about astrology or life? Ask here! Please mention your location. It adds a layer of interest.

6 thoughts on “Why Am I Socially And Romantically Desolate?”

  1. You can’t hold a Gemini in a relationship, it’s like trying to grasp air. Play it cool and aloof and let him come to you.

  2. Dem Geminis…. Lots of romance and fun, but when it comes to the nitty gritty of commitment they are out of the door when you really need them to be there for you, emotionally or physically. Not gonna fly. A gemini can be friendly and outgoing, lots of new stuff and information. It’s always easy to chat with a Gemini, it’s always fun and games.

    But expect to take care of your personal problems yourself, don’t expect them to be there for you, giving you the Kleenex, hugs and comfort teddy bear while you are doing it and don’t expect them to want to hear about it or ask you how it went. (At least for the males).

    I recognize the wide space in the country thing for Sagittarius. 9th house moon here.
    I live in a place close to nature and water, I have considered moving, but the low rent and the bus just outside…. Plus the greenery close by, ducklings and all, close to the main city… It’s really hard to find another place that fits the needs of the moon so damn well!

    This girl should have nature close by in her life!

    1. Anette – You described by kids very well. My daughter has a Gemini Moon – she loves to talk about her latest “adventure.” My son has a Sagittarius Moon. No apartment living for him! He NEEDS his personal space so he bought a house when he was in his twenties. Even as a kid, he kept his bedroom door closed – probably to keep his chatty sister out of his room!

  3. Great advice! Especially about slowing down for a Mars Aries gal…. don’t scatter that energy – learn balance & the two steps forward one step back versus frustration
    Also – maybe this gal is subconsciously attracting a more negative Mars Aries type male- quick, self absorbed & doesn’t need anyone all that much aside for ‘in the moment’
    Maybe she is projecting those qualities she needs to develop within herself (positive manisfestation though)
    A lot of people with Aries or first house tend to attract the wrong people because they really don’t want commitment as much as they may think- they want an inner space or that ‘excuse’ to bail. That’s built in if you choose the wrong perso
    Meh – I’m rambling

    1. Avatar

      Cindy Renee, hearing you, Aries asc,moon Gemini, yep no patience,and I do bail out, especially if a person is slow/boring. Need excitement sag 9th, outdoorsy stuff, hiking, camping, diving.and good friendship more than togetherness. Be the master of my own ship.Next. Lol.

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