Women Who Hate Women

There are a certain number of women…say, twenty percent, who hate other women.  They just hate you. There’s nothing you can possibly do to have them like you because they hate you and it’s not because of you, it’s because of them – they hate all women.

I know this isn’t new.  Many women have come on here and said this – they don’t trust women or women bore them or whatever their reason is. I love women. I can’t imagine life without women friends.

What is the real reason for hating your own sex? For hating half the people in the world?  It’s got to be some kind of self-hate, don’t you think?  If you were comfortable with your femaleness, wouldn’t you be okay with mine?

What does the chart of a woman-hating woman look like? More importantly, have you ever seen a woman-hating woman change her mind?

It seems like self-loathing to me, but I really don’t know that much about it so please…

Tell me what you know about women who hate women.

97 thoughts on “Women Who Hate Women”

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    I think I know a woman hater…she has Pisces in her 1st house. At first I thought maybe her moodiness was about something else but over time it was pretty obvious she was just hateful for no reason. I sometimes wonder if it’s more about an extreme male worship? Like they’re living vicariously through their boyfriends. I agree with your observation that it’s a form of self loathing. Or maybe just an excuse to power trip? Get that power where they can because they feel powerless in some way? Who knows.

  2. Is it really 20%? Maybe only it’s only 20% who aren’t misogynistic? Our society is down on women, pay us less for the same work etc, so maybe it’s only those individuated enough to be free of all that conditioning who can say they’re not women haters deep down? Is that even 20%? Many of us like, love and appreciate the women in our lives but can still carry ideas about women in general that are negative. I’d say maybe Sun conjunct South Node or strong ‘male’ planets, esp Mars because women may be resentful that as a woman their ego is less inclined to be stroked and self assertion more likely to be blocked. Competitiveness is probably a big factor.

    However, even with all the distortions around gender in society still it seems women are often more okay about them/ourselves being interested in things labelled ‘irrational’ or ‘unscientific’ on the basis of does it work for me or not, hence astrology is probably still more popular among women. For pragmatic unbiased reasons.

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    It’s a case by case kind of thing. You can love some women and hate others, Sometimes it may be projected self-hatred, other times it’s because the woman who’s hated is a horrible hurtful person.

  4. I’m instantly put off by a woman who complains about other women being x, y and z. I always point out that you are obviously talking about yourself but don’t blame 50 % of the population for it. Talking to these people is like talking to a misogynistic man. Ever since they pigeonhole you as a female you can not do right.

    I was raised by a woman who hated women and who denied her femininity and was more like a dude. She was also a master manipulator and had awesome gaslighting skills. Like her I used to highly dislike feminine stereotypical women for being weak and fake and stupid. Jeez I used to even agree with misogynistic men.

    Women I am friends with are women who have gone through similar issues and have similar identity problems. Men I am friends with are not misogynistic.

    1. Avatar

      I was raised by a woman with the exact same character traits as the woman who raised you except she could be very masculine or sweetly feminine depending on her mood.

      I don’t agree with hating anyone as an entire group either, but hating someone based on his/her harmful behavior towards you just makes sense to me.

  5. Good topic with the whole Emma Watson 1/3 boob flash

    “I am talking about the fact that Emma Watson has revealed that our culture cannot handle a woman who is both “sexual AND serious,” to quote Naomi Wolf….In one simple photo, Watson has inadvertently bared a troubling truth that our society still, in 2017, cannot fathom the possibility that women can both express themselves sexually AND express a desire for equality, simultaneously. It appears as though flaunting one’s figure and a feminist agenda are mutually exclusive.”

    And most of the bitchy comments and tweets she received …from women.

    1. The issue with Emma Watson is more that she’s a hypocrite. She was happy enough to call out Beyonce for her scantily-clad stage act, then goes and does something very similar to try and promote her movie.

        1. Possibly I have to admit I don’t know enough about either.
          I do feel some of Beyoncé lyrics are not empowering for girls.

  6. I’m male, and don’t hate anyone, male or female. But I have observed, in the process of teaching several hundred young children, that young girls are much more cliquish than boys, and can be kind of mean to those who aren’t in their clique, which is not true of boys. Female teachers I have worked with confirm this fact, and will act to break up cliques when necessary in the classroom. So I suspect that there is a genetic basis for this competitive behavior.

    1. Totally, gemini7. I’m not a teacher but remember this well from school days. In second grade I was part of this friendship triangle. The other two girls were really somehow in competition and I would wind up in the middle. Sometimes it felt like they were fighting over me: “I like your dress.” “Well I like it more” that sort of thing. My Aquarius Mars just kind of detached and my Capricorn Moon wanted to avoid the embarrassment of getting in trouble with the teacher. My Mom told me later that she requested we never be in the same (elementary) class again, and looking back from 3rd-5th grade, we weren’t.

  7. I avoid large groups of either sex, ‘mean girls’ that are hyper feminine and dudely dudes with brash male energy. Because i am not too feminine and will get shoved aside, be the DUFF, or get rejected. I like to talk to women one on one and get to their humanity, dont know if im knocking them down a peg. I work with many guys right now. They are decentish and nice but very clearly do not want me sexually at all and it stings my ego. Because they do fall all over others. A hot girl is coming to work and i will probably avoid spending time with lots of guys and her. Do I hate to be ranked second or last? Am i just a blustery egomaniac who makes life hard for themselves by caring what people think and being avoidant? I dont know. I havent gotten any in more than a year and am progressively avoided by more and more men. To this Ive responded with wild sadness, speculation and general self destruction

  8. I have a pretty strong opinion on this- that women who hate other women are deeply projecting their own unhappiness with themselves. Example: An uneducated woman might hate every other woman who, she assumes, has more education than she and therefore she always feels like she is being judged as “stupid”, even though no one has that thought in their head! So she goes around, defended around being “stupid”, won’t let another woman close because she’s sooooo sure she’s being judged. Which, by the way, makes her stupid. Bwahaha.

  9. I think most women who say they hate other women have had negative experiences with other women from a young age and I would say, as a result, have developed some degree of self-loathing or insecurity due to not having the kind of nurturing or support they craved.

    1. @thatgirl, that is so true. I’ve had it happen to me. And I’ve seen a lot of my mother’s friends from high school and college marry cheating men. I’m really horrified. And weirdly these men are so kind and loving which is why the women will never leave them. The women are also quite passive and sweet. Plus, too, my sister’s mother in law’s have experienced cheating husbands in their life. One of them has had a mistress on the side for decades. My sister and her husband are super religiois so she believes that since she and her husband are good influences, the father who has the mistress gave up on her mistress due to being so deeply ashamed. My mother relayed the information and I asked my sister and she said, yeah since we married (the son of the man who has a mistress) the father in law feels deeply ashamed so he quit the mistress. Somehow I don’t know how to take that, cause I don’t really believe men can just change like that. -_- but my sister and her husband have hope!! (the mistress was once the best friend of her mother in laws) its similar situation to the famous singer Shania Twain with her former best friend and ex husband.

  10. I don’t hate other women. In fact, I prefer their company over men. That being said, I’m very leery of any woman until I know her character as well as I can because I have had a tremendous amount of trouble, pain and betrayal through women (including my mother and daughter.) Pluto squares both moon and venus in my chart. I believe that explains it.

  11. Perhaps, you feel,women who hate women ,sums it up nice and neat ,but perhaps not. I am from a huge tribe of women I have 6 sisters, both grandmothers had more than 6 sisters each;love them ;all ages all kinds. But then after 38 year marriage…
    Before and during (and still) divorce ,of which I never looked back but no less than 10 strange, only polite description, women started calling texting showing up at work .even driving right into my property? Why?
    Just when I think I can relax Pop here comes another nut
    So needless to say; this woman loving woman’s eye squints nose wrinkles and one side of my face goes up as I field yet another off question that I realize, people do throw at others to make themselves comfortable, is really the last thing needed by this woman. I am a looker not a talker. I so enjoy the forms of nature in all Gods designs but sometimes when asked a question or expected to be all hippy skippy. I am good with that.

  12. I find it mind boggling, quite frankly. But all I can think is that they’ve internalized the world’s message that women aren’t as good. A message as old as time. In fact, I’m surrounded by a community of women who would rather have a giant double-headed dildo be mayor than any self-proclaimed “feminist”. ?

  13. I, also, have Lilith conjuct my Sun. My friendships, women & men, are gold to me. People who hate – anyone – spend little time in my horizon.
    ::2¢, for what it’s worth::

  14. I want to share my experience which may be a different perspective. I am a woman who is the constant target of women who hate women. I really am not sure why. Some people have said it’s my beauty or confidence, however this has been a theme in my life ever since I was a little ugly duckLing who was shy and insecure. I consider myself to get along with men better but I also feel as though I had no choice but to be friends with men. My mother was not loving or affectionate and she was psychologically and emotionally abusive. I craved her love so badly and I would say we had a classic codependent/narcissist relationship. Throughout my life I have found myself craving female attention and affection and continually attracting narcissistic women into my life. I fall for it every time and it usually ends very badly. Safe to say I have grown very suspicious and distrustful of women. Other than these crazy women I get involved with other women seem to be envious and catty towards me. Reading all of these comments is sad to me that so many say that if you feel another woman is behaving that way towards you that it is really you who is that way. I have always always yearned for healthy loving relationships with women because I know how amazing that can be! My cousin and I had an amazing friendship as children, my nieces and I have always been extremely close even now as adults. I was afraid to have a daughter after being rejected by women so many times I thought I would not have what it takes to be a good mom to a little girl. Wow was I wrong! She is the light of my life and the most pure and loving soul I’ve ever known. I now have to watch my mother in law favor the male grandchildren and reject my daughter. This is so painful. I truly believe there are horrible people out there who will do anything to destroy an innocent young girl for whatever reason and I just do not understand the manipulative, controlling and passive aggressive behaviour that I have constantly been subjected to by women. I think now that I have recognized this pattern in myself of codependency that I have been able to distance myself from these types of women and have recently attracted into my life 2 wonderful, caring, supportive, beautiful women that I hope to build lifelong friendships with. Thanks for listening to my story and I’d love to hear any thoughts relating.

    Aquarius- Sun, moon, mercury 3rd house.
    Scorpio rising. Pluto 12th.
    1st house- Venus, saturn, uranus in sag.
    Neptune cap 2nd
    Jupiter pisces 4th
    Mars and n. Node Aries 5th house

    1. I’m the one who pointed out that there is a possibility of projection. But I don’t think you are the type of woman I’m talking about. It doesn’t sound like you hate woman at all. It sounds like you actually love women. I was talking about the women who characterize all women as being catty and shallow and hard to get along with. I just saw a distinction and wanted to clarify.

      1. Thank you. I thought I saw this thought expressed more than once which I why I said something about it. I see what you’re saying!

    2. I have attracted a fair number of narcissist women throughout my life too. I also have Pluto in the twelfth house and a first house Venus! I’m told I look very feminine, but my inner self is definitely a mix of masculine, feminine and neutral. I find these days, that I get along better with young women – they bring out my maternal and protective instincts. I tend to avoid woman-hating women now as I’m able to spot them more clearly than when I was young. From what I’ve deduced astrologically, I find woman-hating in a chart tends to be adverse Venus/Pluto aspects, Moon/Saturn, Moon opposition Mars or adverse Moon/Venus aspects, though of course it very much depends on how the native lives out such aspects.

  15. For myself and most of my life, I generally did not like girls. I found them unfair (changing the rules to suit them), manipulative, jealous, selfish, & assisting in making me feel worse about myself at times. I also for 3 decades did not embrace my feminine side. I hated the color pink, refused to wear dresses, & entered a male dominated field. I was very weary of females. The majority of them had a problem with me, usually jealousy or because I’m extremely private I create distrust. If I began to like a female, I would preface that I create jealousy & distrust in people. Please talk to me if you begin to feel this way. I finally had one girlfriend immediately tell me when this happened in our relationship. She admitted her jealousy over another mutual friend choosing me more than her. I could feel that energy, before she told me. We got through it, are still friends, though she does distance herself at times. I think my self-loathing maybe was rooted in my rejection of my feminine self, but despite what I do to myself I have always felt a great love for myself. I think I stir self-loathing in others. Then I gave birth to my daughter, she was the first girl on my husband’s side in 112 years. She is feminine. Desired to be a makeup artist by 2 1/2. She wants everyone to feel beautiful. She showed me why dresses are truly the best thing ever. I wear dresses all the time now. She has a great eye for style. She will turn 10 next month and has the grace and composure of a young queen. I now have embraced my feminine side though I still have the same issues with women from time to time. I’m pretty inexperienced when it comes to astrology, but I’m sure my Sun in Sadge, Moon/Rising in Leo, Mars/Venus in Scorpio had something to do with these relationships.

  16. I love being a woman and I prefer female friends, coworkers. Always have. One thing I have noticed maybe because I have been on this earth so long is that when I am around a “woman hating woman” long enough I will find out she has no sisters, just brothers, generally. Just an observation. I totally ignore catish-ness at all costs, it is just beneath me. Must be my Taurus sun and Aquarian moon how my attitude is about this subject. I did marry “a hunk” 40 years ago and it has been a challenge with the ladies. Whatever, I am happy, so is my husband. He loves being married to a witch 🙂

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