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Twin flames

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(@libralicious)
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Joined: 13 years ago

Would love to hear everyone's thoughts on twin flames.

Do you believe this is a real thing that exists?

If so, why?

If not, why?

Also, anyone who is willing to share their own personal experience, I think those stories would be super interesting to hear!

Peace ✌️ and happy Friday ?

** editing to add: if you believe twin flames can be identified in one's chart, would definitely love to hear your thoughts there as well!

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(@belladonna)
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I did a lot of recent research on the subject after a reading with a psychic. I'd heard the pop-cultural referencing many a time and now after researching realized (like astrology) how misunderstood/misused the subject is. 

That being said, while I find it super interesting, I also find it potentially very harmful depending on the recipient and interpretation (that which can be used to enable one's toxic patterns). 

Particularly for those already prone to abusive/ trauma-bond dynamics or Neptunian problem-related relationships/projections. I can see how easy it would be to cast a lover as a twin flame to unconsciously enable the dynamic, and it can be extremely toxic and waste away people's time and life hanging onto the hope.

In my case, I had a psychic tarot reading with someone I've had many with and I asked him about a recent lover. He never said twin flame, but to my surprise, he didn't dismiss the "relationship"/dynamic altogether as I was expecting. Instead, his first response was - when he read his energy/our dynamic - he had a very clear vision of a mirror - that it was like our souls were mirrors at this moment in time. That sparked my curiosity because of so much of what I'd already been feeling/experiencing with this person. And, I don't mean mirror in a pleasant way, per se. It was a very uncomfortable dynamic in fact, very much described within a twin flame relationship. We also had many other applicable elements that the twin flame thing details - many weird interlacings of stories, life experiences, views, etc... yet we were also like total opposites in so many ways, from totally different countries, our actual physical appearances etc. 

I think the lessons of the twin flame mirroring still very much applied... and he definitely darted so fast as described by the (runner/chaser) thing, except I wasn't chasing him after he ran. And the initiation of our meeting was very electric and intoxicating as well the way it is often described..

but my hang-up is - so are a lot of toxic, not meant to last relationships. Most relationships are seasons and honestly, every relationship is a mirror in many ways...

so I guess I don't believe in the whole reunion part of the twin flame thing so then I guess that means I don't really believe in twin flames, but I do think there's a lot of validity to the mirroring part that one can learn from and even though that can be said for all relationships, there can be certain people that our souls indeed align with that have the profundity of this very intense, accelerated journey that elevates our consciousness of self and how we relate to the other and therefore a path to unconditional love for both self and the other...

but I think it's very very tricky... because if you've got a Neptunian streak like me, hanging onto the possibility of a return is so so likely and obviously very damaging. 

So, while I related to so much of the description of the experience, I had to let go of the narrative and take the lesson as one still within a season.. otherwise, I'd be hanging onto a fantasy forever and blocking reality. 

as for the astrology, no idea although I'd be curious... I never had his exact birth time to compare charts, so couldn't conclude anything anyway - maybe involving N & S nodes? 

basically, I think this particular dynamic did elevate my consciousness and gave me a better understanding of self, acceptance, surrender, and so on...

If he ever comes back.. I'll follow up - then maybe this whole thing could be true after all - but I sure as hell ain't waiting around believing in the narrative. Instead, I'll let myself be pleasantly surprised 😉 

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buendia
(@buendia)
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@belladonna Thank you for your insights, BellaDonna. They definitely align with my own thoughts on the topic, and correlate with my own experiences. The NN and SN popped into my head immediately as I read along, but I was somewhat surprised when you mentioned them as most people don’t when discussing this topic. If you care to share, I’d be really interested in hearing more about your experience and the (possible) nodal contacts involved.

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(@belladonna)
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@buendia Hi Buendia, I think you misunderstood what I said re the nodes. I don't have any idea of the astrology in general for twin flames (if any) - but my guess would be the nodes would be involved. 

I think maybe you were referring to me saying the subject of twin flames is often misunderstood/lacking in real knowledge - and I put in ( ) like astrology, meaning how astrology is often a misunderstood subject due to people's lack of education on the subject and therefore it is pop culture surface stuff for most. Basically, I was just making a comparison of twin flames and astro as subjects and a general ignorance around it for the majority.

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buendia
(@buendia)
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@belladonna oh I see, sorry, I misinterpreted that. No, I wasn’t asking about the astrology of twin flames specifically, but the astrology of your experience. I thought you mentioning the nodes was connected to the synastry of your past encounter (even without time of birth, it would reveal the position of the nodes and any planets near them), but you were really just tossing some possible ideas out there for OP’s question. My apologies. 

I asked because your experience sounds like what I’ve been investigating as “nodal experiences,” which I’ve observed are sometimes interpreted (or misinterpreted, I’m not sure) as twin flame encounters. 

Yes, my agreement was regarding the general misunderstanding of the topic, as I see it.

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buendia
(@buendia)
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Yes, my agreement was regarding the general misunderstanding of the topic, as I see it. But moreso the experiences and reflections you shared. Didn’t edit in time to add this to my last post.

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PurpleStarGirl
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@belladonna 

Funny you mention the possibility of the nodes being highlighted in twin flame relationships. I know a guy who's in love with me that has his Venus on my south node and my Venus is on his north node. I doubt we're twin flames because I don't feel any connection to him at all...no feelings, no nothing. I might have foud him attractive at one point but that's all. He tried pressuring me into a relationship and I bolted (Venus in Aquarius).

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(@libralicious)
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@belladonna I agree 100% re your comment about the toxic element in the spiritual community. I was briefly obsessed a couple of years ago with tarot videos that tended to focus on twin flames, and they have the (unintended, I hope) consequence of keeping you attached, obsessed and holding on to unhealthy dynamics.

I have my own experience with two guys from my past - one's sun is almost a direct conjunction to my N Node; the other an almost direct conjunction to my S Node. I was definitely in the "runner" energy with N Node guy, and with S Node guy, he was definitely the "runner". Interestingly enough, with S Node guy, my sun is an almost exact conjunction to his S Node.

So I definitely believe there's some fated element to some of our relationships. But the whole, "we were incarnated as one" theory, I'm not sure that aligns with my personal beliefs.

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(@belladonna)
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apology not necessary...

"I asked because your experience sounds like what I’ve been investigating as “nodal experiences,” which I’ve observed are sometimes interpreted (or misinterpreted, I’m not sure) as twin flame encounters."

 

interesting! ya I so wish I had his birth time but he didn't know it

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Libra Noir
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(@libra-noir)
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I posted something years ago here about a relationship I had with someone at the time and someone commented that it sounded like a twin flame. I don’t know if it was or not, but I can say that if that’s what it was….then the “twin flame journey” sucks.

It was incredibly unhealthy and some of the stories I hear from others about being a twin flame sound unhealthy too. To be totally honest with you about what I think- I think the new age community portrays a lot of unhealthy and self destructive behavior patterns in a spiritual light. I think the ego can easily attach itself to many concepts like twin flame, starseed, etc. It’s a belief system after all (one that actually aligns a bit with my own, but not to the point where common sense is undermined). 

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(@libralicious)
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@libra-noir Agree. I think most of us would be far healthier in our approach to all of our interpersonal and romantic relationships if we took an active interest in understanding our attachment styles and healing our attachment traumas. Because self-sabotaging behavior is not a sign of your love, loyalty or commitment to a romantic partner ?

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PurpleStarGirl
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(@purplestargirl)
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Twin flames is an interesting concept to learn about but the way the journey is described does sound extremely toxic to me. I mean I'll keep an open mind about it but nothing further.

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(@libralicious)
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@purplestargirl yep, and too often you see the twin flame tarot youtubers justifying a twin flame relationship with a married "twin". I mean, what?!!?

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PurpleStarGirl
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@libralicious 

It's also supposedly very rare to be with a twin flame in this lifetime. People justify extremely toxic relationships as being part of a twin flame union and that's just not healthy.

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(@libralicious)
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@purplestargirl And I would argue that, even the concept of it being rare and unlikely in this lifetime, or the belief that it's rare, is part of what keeps people in despair and hanging on. What's the saying? Attachment is the root of all suffering.

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la_sirena
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(@la_sirena)
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What I don’t understand is why it needs a label in the first place. I believe in love at first sight, I believe in transformative relationships you feel at the soul level, where you can communicate without words... 

I believe those types of relationships exist. They are beautiful and can even bring you closer to source and your own true nature, they bring out the best in you and make you want to be better... they feel like coming home and can be a source of comfort and inspiration.

However you want to label it, these types of relationships exist and that’s good enough for me. I don’t see a need to put a label on it. Pretty much everything that humans have put labels on has been effed up beyond belief. Now every person who is obsessed with someone can say they’ve met their twin flame and they can use it as an excuse for their toxic behavior.

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(@libralicious)
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@la_sirena I think, also, that the label can take you down a rabbit hole of endless searching for definitions of what it means by a lot of people who are grifting off the pain and heartache of people desperately searching for confirmation bias of their hopes made during really, really low times in their lives. It can turn the desperate person into a toxic hot mess who's stuck in that cycle for years.

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PurpleStarGirl
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@la_sirena 

I like the idea of transformative relationships, probably because I prefer a deep emotional bond in mine (Blame my Scorpio ASC for that) since I identify as demiromantic, which means I don't develop romantic feelings until a deep emotional bond is established. That's only happened to me twice in my life.

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(@gemini7)
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@la_sirena Yes, and I don't understand the difference, if there is any, between a twin flame and a primary soulmate--which we pretty much all have, and perhaps more than one...

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