Here I go again, claiming that people don’t change. I must do this once a year. A person may develop other interests or change their priorities, but their basic nature really does seem fixed.
This is on my mind, because my sister (who just lost her husband) is calling me many times a day. The stats on our relationship are pretty shocking.
I have only seen her three times in 40 years. There was a 25 year period where there was no contact at all, though neither of us were upset or mad at each other in any way. So now there is this intense communication and you think we’d be strangers, but we’re not.
I was preteen the last time I spent significant time with my sister. When I talk to her, I feel exactly the same way I did then. I think the same things as well, namely, I think. “Get a load of this!” That’s my opinion of my sister.
So today this came up on her end.
“I lost my husband, but it gives me a chance to get to know my little sister.”
“I guess. I feel like I know you,” I said. “I don’t feel like you’ve changed at all.”
“You haven’t changed much either,” she said. ‘You’re the same as you were when you were a little girl, as far as I can remember.”
“Really? What was I like when I was young, in your eyes?” I asked.
“I don’t know. We were just all trying to get out of there. We were all out there in the desert, trying to protect our bodies and our minds. We were trying to survive the shit and get out.”
“Hmm,” I said.
She’s right. She is exactly and precisely right. I want to escape (Neptune) oppression (Saturn). Everything I do, on every level, every day, is to this end.
Let’s just say that I can spot a trap. I am glad to have this skill. I don’t think it’s all that common.
Can you spot a trap?
I have Saturn conjunct Uranus in Sadge, and they both apply to an out-of-sign square with my Aries Mars. Not only I can spot traps, I also feel compelled to shred them to pieces : ))
I struggle to spot traps, unless it’s probably in the 9th house/10th house realms. I steer clear of anything that appears to have strings attached, but I can still get duped every now and then, especially when prior information was unavailable.
I have come to believe that the core of a person does not change either. Circumstances can push someone to make personal shifts, and karma can make a person a better adherent of the golden rule, but the fundamental temperament stays the same. I feel ok with my essential core, but I do want to have good karma as much as possible.
no, neptune opposite my sun. is your neptune conjunct your Saturn? it’s been difficult to accept that people don’t change their basic nature;; my own self and others. i keep wanting to see some rosy “it all works out in the end” movie, and esp. in relationships, i have to watch it because i see what i want, not what is.
And why even if I see the trap I have to walk into it?
I’m bad at spotting traps set for me, but very good at freeing others from traps. Occasionally, though, the traps I free others from somehow come back to snap me in the ass. I’m also overly-idealistic and a very easy “read” to others, so when it comes to traps, eh, prolly not a good idea to take me as a hunting companion. I have no idea of the astrology of this — both my Saturn and Mars are in signs of their exaltation so maybe this is Pisces moon? At least I’m aware of it, wherever “it” originates.
@Fritzy Ritz
I am very easy to read as well. In my case, I have a Pisces Ascendant, and I have Moon square Ascendant. Nonetheless, I try not to let that get the better of me.
Not always, but pity the person(s) that trap me and have to deal with it. 😀
I think I pick the boxes that I do actually walk into most times. I try not to think of the responsibilities I take on as a trap, because I can do that. I can get really ridiculous about ‘feelin trapped’. To the point of feelin trapped in a body that has to be taken care of and has to deal with hard reality. Then it is time to balance with a good dose of earthly pleasure.
Rockin comments by the way, all around. I so can relate.
like the old dog on the porch howling
man says ” why your dog howling”
other says ‘ he’s sitting on a nail”
may says ” why don’t he move”
other says ” he’s to comfortable”
want change get of your nail and stop howling
What a great angle to approach Neptune and Saturn: spotter of traps, Elsa! Neptune aspects my Saturn-Mars-Pluto conj so I am as you, always, on the lookout for the escape hatch. I too agree that in the main, people stay the same. Tweaking and fine-tuning is a continual process for me, a responsibility I guess (I have lots of Capricorn). Tweaking the ever vigilant escape artist means being able to feel safe when “it” is safe. Balancing act.
Yes, I can spot a trap, once I ‘ve fallen itno it and then struggled like hell to extract myself from it! However, there are always other traps to figure out. This has ben my life, living in so many places and always having to fend for myself. I was always the perfect scapegoat for small minded people. I’ve often stayed away from people so that I can protect myself, only to find myself heading into, and hopefully veering away from another trap…. Scorpio stellium in the 8th house, Mars in Pisces in the 12th house, Pisces ascendant, Pluto in the 6th in Virgo. Most traps I fall into have to do with me trying to help someone who I perceive is in need or in crisis. I have gotten good at diagnosing who has a personality disorder and is creating a fake crisis, though.
I think family connection is really amazing. You don’t see someone for years but you had this childhood together and its binding. I believe this is something that binds you together for life whether you see the person all the time or not. They are the only person that got to see your childhood in a similar way to yourself and it glues you together more than any friendship can.
I know with my sisters there have been times when I haven’t seen for long periods of time but we pick right back up where we left off and they understand the feelings I have about that time and the pain I associate with it. This is something we will never lose …even if I don’t see them again for 20 years. They know. They know all about it and its the glue. We don’t always see eye to eye. We are all completely different people in so many ways but there is the one thing that we have and that is this childhood we shared.
I am not sure if I can spot a trap because I see everything as a trap initially even if its innocent. And the only thing I can connect this too is a stellium in Scorpio and a childhood where I was actually trapped for years in the most awful of situations. When backed against the wall all these years later I still run like a rabbit….and I waste no time in doing it.
I think its wonderful that you are welcoming your sister into your home. She has devastating loss and you are going to help her piece herself back together. Who better to do this than someone who understands her roots….. It’s going to be an adjustment having someone else in your living space like that but I would do the same thing should it be needed. I am not going to see one of my sisters homeless and hungry. And for me….having one of them here would be a three ring circus but I would be sick if I thought one of them were out there in need. ♥♥♥
You may find some interesting things out about yourself that you either don’t remember or have buried over the years. This could be healing for everyone.
Winks n Waves :::::::: from the old SnP
This may be luck, but I can say people don’t even try this with me that often. I have Saturn trine Neptune as a part of a Sextile Series, with Sun conjunct Pluto in the middle sextiling both, though. I think this may give me an edge in spotting traps well in advance. And as Fritzy Ritz, I can tell when someone else is about to be screwed over too. Especially at work.
I tend to spot all kinds of traps that I shouldn’t. It means I’m never fully commited to anything…part of me is out the door already. It’s lonely and exhausting.
I guess I am learning the hard way. Neptune (naivety) Jupiter (thinking everyone is good) Uranus (trap itself and the liberation) all conjunct to Sun in 11th. Thinking from that angle, I get into traps and I am getting wise afterwards. I am distant to friendships now, after some friends ‘I would give everything for’ wouldn’t be there for me even in smallest matters, but, install guilt like I owed them something. But there are also the good ones, but I am like..I don’t care, unfortunately.
It will take time until I will learn trap avoiding, without avoiding the life itself.
I think sometimes I think things are traps that are not. I have Mercury square natal Rx Neptune.
Yeah, I can spot a trap. It used to be more emotionally difficult for me to walk away from them, but now I just don’t care anymore. I know what I’m equipped to deal with, and people can call me a flake if they want. I think it’s a valuable skill, and I learned it from my father. He taught me the value of walking away from something that isn’t going to be the best option for you.
maybe I see traps where they don’t exist? Uranus opposite moon…
Walk into them and then have to chew my leg to get out…but I never walk into the same trap twice.
Spotting the traps has been easy…now avoiding them has been the hard part. Lol. I have Sun and Venus conjunct Neptune…in ever so optimistic Sag, plus Mars in the 12th. However. I’ve been finding myself ever so grateful for Saturn in Scorpio lately for presenting me with reality checks, laser vision and helping me to slow my proverbial roll. Feels amazing to incorporate “no” into my vocabulary.
Saturn in Scorpio is giving me eyes to see what I havent in the past. I have a fixed t-square/opposition at 21-22 degrees involving sun-moon-uranus…..2nd/8th/11th. Someone from the past has shown up in my life…and my inner voice is screaming at me…he’s playing me. I have Saturn 3rd Capricorn square venus 12th Libra. I did a composite chart and his Neptune sits on my sun at 22 Scorpio……Is he “fooling-decieving” me? I’m seeing more and more and see that I haven’t seen traps and maybe I’m just starting to.