Do Weirdos Find Weirdos To Marry?

generic personSomeone told me that weirdos find weirdos (to marry). I got the impression she felt it was easier to find a spouse if you were weird because you see each other out there.

I tend to agree with this because when you’re looking for someone more homogenized you’re likely to find one of two things… maybe more but this is what I can think of on the fly:

First, a person may follow trends to a large enough degree, they’re under-developed as an individuals.  think you have to actually take a chance if you want to distinguish yourself.

This point leads to the next – if you’re rather generic, I don’t know that many would be moved to commit and stick with you. It’s kind of like online dating…

I worked with a gal for years, she was beautiful and personable and funny. She was in NYC so she could go any site or app and have an array of men interested in her within the hour.

She did this for years. I can’t count how many charts I have of the various men she met and dated, briefly.  They were all really exciting for a day or two… a week or two at the most.  It was like she was dating a “template”.  I’m going to write about that next.

For now, do you think you are well enough defined as an individual, a person can’t just date another version of you and another and another?

photo imagined by a GAN (generative adversarial network) StyleGAN2 (Dec 2019) – Karras et al. and Nvidia (This person does not exist)

19 thoughts on “Do Weirdos Find Weirdos To Marry?”

  1. I’m a definite weirdo. On the one hand: yes, weirdos marry other weirdos because normal people most likely would not want them/would be uncomfortable with them.
    On the other hand, I’m the poster child for “so weird I can’t find someone to be with.” If you have more quirks and weird fits, then it’s so much harder to find someone that fits with you. There are definitely no other versions of me, but nobody wants me anyway except uh…dubious people.

    “This point leads to the next – if you’re rather generic, I don’t know that many would be moved to commit and stick with you. It’s kind of like online dating…”

    I disagree. People who are more generic are more likely to easily “fit” with others. I know some extremely boring people who are happily married and just fine. If you aren’t picky, you just plain have more options in the world to choose from that will work for you.

    1. “I disagree. People who are more generic are more likely to easily “fit” with others. I know some extremely boring people who are happily married and just fine.”

      I would have agreed with you as recently as five years ago. But getting married is no longer usual or even common. So if you want to be MARRIED (which is different then spending time together for a few years), you’re more likely to have the opportunity if you stand out in some way.

      Otherwise it’s two ships that pass in the night, even if they circle each other for awhile.

      Basically no one “settles down” with someone unless they find them singular in a way that’s compelling. And if everyone injects their but with fat or other compounds, well, it’s curious but not compelling.

      1. Well, possibly they stand out to each other somehow in a way that I, as a weirdo, would not be able to perceive?

        Each to their own, and all that.

  2. Hmm I believe I am oddly unique…
    Still wishing for evening company
    As I believe, men I have been with ,are
    Still , at my age, feeding ego with work accomplishments ,and with small open time, feels like, I am too difficult to conquer;the job so well practiced
    Boo hoo, hopefully tide does turn and I may become the desire of one;
    To help conquer the day and night.
    Think all that I have been trained to be is “a tough horse to break” hoping
    For a whisperer

    1. I love your hope for a whisperer, Raerae. Think it was Elsa who once wrote, ‘you rescue me, i rescue you’ … trading places on the horse. Weirdos would do that sort of thing; we do it in our house.

  3. “Think all that I have been trained to be is “a tough horse to break” hoping
    For a whisperer”

    This is very sweet. 🙂
    I hope for that for you as well.

  4. My BF and I met on Twitter, and we are DEFINITELY not like the average Joe couple, but we are still homogeneous enough to fit into the world around us and it’s values.

    My struggle has been to find someone that could match my intelligence, and one who sees things in another light that complement my world view. I have Mercury, Sun, Venus and Jupiter crushed together. In Scorpio.
    He has a lot of planets in Virgo. I like the match. The level of communication in our relationship is high – we both have our moons in Libra.

    I like him because we can be weird AS WELL AS normal together.

    In dating apps I was the hot and nerdy girl. I got SO many dates because there are more male nerds than female nerds. Sounds cliche, but I never had difficulty attracting nerds. But it took one special nerd with his heart and brain in the right place. We are two odd shoes that fit nicely together LOL.

  5. My Mercury-Uranus aspect talking here, I’m amazed the person in the photo doesn’t even exist! The technology is astounding. But there MUST be someone in the world that is an exact likeness (7 billion and counting, what would the odds be?)

    Just browsing through the site, “this person does not exist”. Keep refreshing the page and you will come up with a different realistic but imaginary person each time.

    Mercury-Neptune also, it’s rather fun making up stories about them, what they are like, what jobs they do, etc.

    Also, purely for reasons of vanity, trying to find if they accidentally created a likeness of ME!

    I’m obviously a bit of a weirdo ?

  6. I think I’m completely normal but I’ve been told I’m weird. I really don’t think I am – I have just had a different upbringing from most people, so perhaps my cultural references are different from most. But I do live in the real world and have normal tastes, habits and dress sense. The weirdest I get (compared to others) is that I’m interested in metaphysics, archetypes and the concept of the flow of energy (according to different interpretations). But I don’t talk about these things much. I’m a very ‘Hi, how was your day?’ kind of person. Maybe they can see through me… ? I love quirky men (especially Aquarians) as long as they don’t sap my energy. I prefer the saturnine Aquarians over the Uranian types.

  7. Avatar
    Hildegarde's Noviciate

    No…Im definitely eccentric but in a Uranus/Aquarian way.
    My interests are far and wide and rather unusual.I tend to hold someones attentions if they are intelligent and open minded but I wouldnt say Im weird.
    I dont agree with “weird” anyway. It implies judgement.I prefer eccentric, quirky or bent but in a good way.
    Those that were attracted to me say its because Im different. Yes. It happens alot.
    I guess you can say I “get it”.
    And I am attracted to someone who “gets it” too.
    I would like them because they are eccentric and vibe wigh me….but also because they also understand the painful downfalls of being quirky or different in this culture.

  8. I fit in just fine – if I keep my opinions to myself (and having Libra, I know how to do that). A sense of belonging happens when you sense you can reveal your weird side and it meshes with the weirdness of the other. If he happens to be nice looking, gentlemanly and holds a job — wow! Lucky I found that!

    Incidentally, I agree with Elsa about uniqueness. Every year, a younger crowd of ambitious women comes to NYC to find fame, fortune and hopefully, true love. With more women here than men and more coming all the time (pre-pandemic), the men feel a real sense of FOMO in choosing one, unless the woman is really unique. The exception is when hey have a “type” imprinted on their soul and feel lucky to find that type likes them back.

  9. I love this. Indeed my husband and I are “weird” by other’s standards. We are perfect for each other.

    I’ve never been one to be attracted to what most people are. I believe the same goes for my husband.

  10. I love this topic! I live in nyc and think I’m pretty funny. Used to go out every night before covid. But now, I dont know how I would ever meet anyone to marry but honestly I’ve never been happier being a hermit!

  11. Everyone’s opinion of what weird is will be different. To attract someone and keep them isnterested, I think it’s good to be well-rounded, to work on your mind, to have your own unique interests and to be true to yourself and all that. I also believe in keeping some mystery about yourself.

  12. Avatar

    Maybe it’s time to let my freak flag fly. Sigh. My Capricorn is yelling hellllllllll noooooooo I can’t do it. I live in a conservative-ish suburb and I live alone sometimes and maybe feel protected when I “follow the rules”. But pandemicworld was feeling like the last straw. But my Venus-Uranus in 7th is like how the hell are we gonna be happy if we do the same damn thing all the time. I’m tired of it. Time to break the mold again.

  13. Hm, you know, I have never thought about that actually. However, I believe that the “weirdos” are looking for weirdos to marry, but usually, they do not find one. I mean, love is not something that you control. If we could do that, it would have been way easier for us. As an example, would be my wife and me. I see her as a “weirdo” while I am more serious and calm compared to her. So, according to your statement, she hasn’t found her “weirdo,” basically the right person to marry?!

    1. One thing about weirdos is they tend to think they are normal! So you may be weirder than you think. You’re on an astrology blog for one thing.

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