Does my boyfriend regret leaving me? I’m often asked this question. Typically the answer is no.
I don’t say that to be harsh. I thought a post like this might help people who are consuming themselves over the loss of some old lover to move on.
No, he (she) does not regret leaving you. It may surprise you to hear this put bluntly but when people, mull over their relationship history, they tend to think about all the good things they did and said. They focus on the sacrifices they made and the overall wonder of their being while ignoring the sacrifices the other person made, the good things the other person did and said, etc.
They also deny, minimize or justify the less savory bits of their personalities. They simply fail to see how they taxed the other person; cost them in some way that brought their partner to a breaking point.
It’s easy to see why someone would do this. They’ve already been left and it’s human nature to want to shore yourself up and feel better. You want the person so be wracked with regret but they rarely are.
Most people don’t want to be alone. They leave a relationship when they realize they can’t sustain it or that the bad outweighs the good. If someone broke up with you, it means that for them the bad outweighed the good, even if you can list 700 million things that are good about you.
Do you want a person who have broken up with you to feel regret? Why?
Only one person ever left me, and I am sure she does not regret it, nor would I want her to.
All the others, I am the one who left, and I have no regrets.
In all instances, we were incompatible to start with. What is there to regret?
I think some of us want the other person to regret breaking up with us because our ego’s been bruised. We have effectively been “fired” from their life. If they feel no pain from our absence, then maybe their life is better without us in it. Ouch!
I’ve been fired from a long term job before, and yes, the bad outweighed the good. I was no longer what they needed. Do I hope they regretted letting me go? Kind of. I’d like to believe my absence made SOME sort of difference and that I left a void at the workplace. But they’re still thriving so….I guess my presence is no longer necessary. I can move on with my life. Byeeee! ?