“I would understand this, if you were a boring person,” I told a Gemini client. “But you’re not. So why are you writing this horrible script (in regards to a girl he likes)? The girl is crazy about you. Can you not see you’re riding a wave here? Can you not ride a wave?”
It’s so common, a person is their own worst enemy. In this case, the man over-thinks, but there are a number of ways that people undo themselves.
What kills me is watching someone mess up their wave, in a situation where waves are hard to come by. That’s not what is happening in this case. I got this man’s attention. But it happens all the time. You’ve seen it and I’ve seen it.
A person can be poised on top a wave that will take them exactly where they say they want to go. They can have all the skills necessary to ride that wave…but they refuse.
Why?
Fear. Success comes with expectations, and what if one can’t live up to them? You get the girl – good job – but then what are you going to do to keep the girl? And then what? And THEN what?
I don’t think most people think it that deep, but it’s under what they are thinking.
So Saturn, I suppose, in many cases. It’s been in mine. I’ve notice that Saturn/Cap types can come in 2 kinds – the kind that can ride their waves, and the ones that crash themselves. I’m mostly the first kind. I stray into the second kind by refusing to even approach the wave I’m afraid of riding. “I’m not going to get anywhere, so why even try?”
I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that I’m my own worst enemy.
Amen, CW. *fistbumps*
I’ve got sun conjunct Saturn and I cottoned onto the fear thing early, but I still haven’t managed to not get in my own way most of the time. I’m learning, though — slowly but surely, I’m learning. Jupiter and Neptune types help me with this immensely. 🙂
There are a lot more ways to get something wrong than there are to get something right…
I don’t know, I’ve been contemplating this exact thing for over 2months now. I just didn’t have the clarity to put it into these kinds of words. So thank you for the words of clarity :)!!!
For me, I think it might have more to do with the question: is this wave taking me where I really want to go?
Angie
I think most of the time people aren’t necessarily refusing, they’re confused!
I see exactly what I described, alllll the time. A person is headed towards exactly what they want…and they thwart themselves.
I conclude they don’t really want what they say they want…but realize, if they are calling me (who will call them out), they probably are just hitting some kind of block they want to get beyond.
I agree the situation is common, but the reason is not. The biggest issue is being blind to yourself… it’s that bit I don’t get (though I’m sure I’m guilty of it too!)
I agree the reasons may be varied, but bet fear is at the root, in most cases.
Hi Elsa,
I’m off-topic, but wanted to tell you that you were so right in the reading you did for me several months ago. My son and his wife stayed where they are, in the jobs they were in. No quitting and moving without jobs.
The man who died was my father (long-time coming, he was absolutely ready, and it actually went more smoothly can I could have imagined, 5 days in the hospital, never stuck in a wheelchair or a nursing home which were his greatest hopes). I’ll miss him, but am honestly relieved for him.
And my daughter, who you warned wasn’t done blowing up her life yet…. No, she wasn’t done. Lucky, even in blowing it up, how little damage she did.
I figured if I was you, I’d want to know how the stuff you saw turned out.
–Teresa Hill
Thank you, Teresa. I am sorry to hear about your father, but I’m glad this worked out so well.
Elsa,
Thank you. I told my friends, other than the fact that he’s gone, everything went as well as it absolutely could have. 🙂 It was like my family was impersonating a freakishly normal, sane family the whole time. Cooperative, helpful, kind, sad but calm and accepting, even pleasant in that we got to see and hear from a lot of people who loved my dad and why they loved him. Got to see so many relatives I hadn’t seen in a decade or more.
Oddly, as I visited a few weeks before, last time I saw Daddy outside the hospital, he said he wanted me to do him a favor with some of my relatives after he was gone. I said, “Do you want me to tell them to shut up and the petty crap? I’ll do that.” And he said, “No, I want you all to try to get along.”
I said, “Geez, I can’t do that. I don’t think anybody can.”
But in the end, it was like somebody cast a spell over all of us, and it worked.
((((Teresa))))
I don’t think the reason is just fear of not meeting expectations, it is fear that one is not worthy or deserving of the prize. It helps to have supportive people around you who encourage you to go for it and not worry how it all turns out. Once you conquer one hill, you become more eager to attempt another…Saying this as an older and wiser Saturn square Venus person with a Capricorn moon. First, be prepared, and then go for it!
They may assume things have to be harder than they actually are. It’s common with Saturn types. They may not want anything that feels like it comes too easily.
Capricorn/Saturn types always attract me with their cool understated confidence and appear so solid. When you get to know them better (and this takes time) you discover they are covering up a lot of hurts/insecurities and are way too hard on themselves. They have plenty on offer and need to have higher self esteem.
While all signs are capable of writing horrible scripts, the client mentioned is Gemini, so the sign’s inherent nature is mental. Gemini can race through experience while quickly gathering clues and processing information. Wide-eyed amazement and wonder are their strengths and a path to soul growth; but their downfall is this: When they’ve already answered the question they asked you and are off free associating their data with three other thoughts while pretending to listen; all the while shaping their own answers to their script of how life works. That is a Gemini getting in their own way and not riding the wave.
I don’t know why people do this. I can honestly say that I’ve never ridden a wave. I’ve had to struggle for everything. It really makes me appreciate those opportunities that I do get because I have some control in it. Maybe that has something to do with it? It can feel really destabilizing and scary to be on a trajectory that feels out of ones control.
My Gemini posting from earlier aside, people’s comments on Saturn on the thread has me thinking about ways I don’t ride my own waves; like when I think I’m growing and have a plan and on my way acquiring skills; then in a foggy moment may tweak my back muscle or stub my toe, like it’s the Universe trying to tell me something. I too have a strong Saturn and want so very much want to be in control of my own self that I wonder, could that be the problem? When one is riding the wave isn’t there a surrender of control in order to be in control? Does anyone get what I’m saying?
Everybody rides a wave, whether they realize it or not. Yes even the ones that worked for their wave (s), they had to work for their wave (s) but it’s still a wave or waves.
It can take a person many years (six or more) to work up momentum and gain ground. For Saturn types like me, nothing is to come easily or fast. I definitely sabotaged myself once, and once was more then enough!