Regarding the burdened man, Elena writes:
“Reading posts like these scare the hell out of me! You seem so insightful, but in the same time a bit fatalistic. Are we really doomed to carry the burden of our charts forever?”
Elena, I am sorry the post scared the hell out of you. Fact is these blogs are about a specific individual and they represent my opinion of this one specific case, based not only on his chart but on my observations of him over the course of a couple of years. So my read on this should not be enlarged or projected or assigned to other people in any way.
As for being doomed, people are absolutely doomed if they have no drive or desire to change their lives when evidence suggests things aren’t working. But I never said this guy’s life was not working. It may be working perfectly for him! I am in no position to judge.
I can however offer my insight to my friend who prior to this conversation was operating under the illusion that this guy did not “pick her” because of some personal shortcoming. Well hell. This guy doesn’t pick anyone! Women pick him and they do so at their own peril.
So with this information my friend was able to get some clarity and let go the idea it was the shape of her butt that was the problem, and the illusion that some other differently shaped butt could come along and allow this guy to be a different human being. And this has been a great relief to her, you can imagine. Her butt is fine! She can think about other things now, and I decided to post this so others could hitchhike because this scenario is not exactly uncommon.
hi elsa — i was a hitchhiker on that original post and it had the effect of being a well timed shot of clarity about a situation that was/is having trouble resolving itself. the universe spoke through you. my thanks.
The situation is actually very common, I’ve experienced it many times and each time blamed myself for things that probably werent’ the culprit! Is it my hair, my mouth, my eyes, my height, my butt, my feet, etc. It’s nice to know sometimes that it’s just not personal, people are who they are. It still stinks sometimes, but that’s the way it is.
There is a mirror to this situation too. For people w/Neptune on their ASC, either natally or by transit, someone can be totally nutz about what they “think” is you. Neither option is workable for any length of time. Experience taught me that in the end the best thing we can do if we want to be in a good relationship, is to do serious work on ourselves. I have Mars in Scorpio which is all about the unwritten contract of expectations and once I sorted those out, it was possible to be a decent partner.
It’s sooo trite but we need to develop appreciation for ourselves first before anyone else will give us that . . . unless they’re some kind of saint, and those are in short supply on this planet . . . 🙂
I totaly agree with you Neith.
I too have Mars in Scorpio AND Neptune opposition Ascendant. I’m usualy so nice and giving and easy-going that there are plenty people who get in a hurtful mode if given the chance cuz I’m still strugling very much…
I’m trying to be more demanding and bitchy, but I can’t seem to adjust the tone of that so as not to come across as a monster, but rather a person with rules and expectations and a need for respect.. How you did you do it Neith?
Lots & lots of introspection, turning over in my mind what my idea of a good relationship was & looking for the catches. Know exactly what you mean about adjusting the tone . . . and since Mars is conjunct my Mercury in Scorpio, I just decided the best option for me was to keep my mouth shut more often than not. Be aware that those of us with Mars in Scorpio put out a pretty intense energy especially if we’re pissed . . . don’t have to say anything! 🙂 My advice on what to say, keep it simple – not that I succeed in doing that myself but it works if I can!