Isolating Is Horrific If The Goal Is To Evolve


Most people around the world as more isolated then they were in the old normal.  I know some people like it but I am not sure the realize the cost.

First, this is not just about staying home more. We’re also in a digital prison whether we realize it or not.  Whatever you like or dwell on, multiplies.  This is done for you. Heavy lifting on your part is unnecessary.

Unfortunately, your capacity to affect change in your life erodes. Your skills erode in your digital hall of mirrors.  It’s also profoundly addictive.  You’re the master of your world, seemingly.

I decided to write this because of my Chiron in Pisces post. My husband made a remark… he’s willing and able to make a remark; this is becoming quite rare.  Real people will real insight who are willing to share. I understand why they’ve clammed up. I do this myself and I’m beat for it on daily basis – not fun!

So my husband makes this remark and it absolutely liberates me.  Would I have got there without him? I don’t think so.  The “prison” is too complete. It’s effective!  We’re all set up to avoid anything abrasive or challenging. This is detrimental, especially over time.

Chiron In Pisces: The Endlessly Seeping Wound

I know I have Libra, but I really don’t think it’s good to avoid others. This made me think of my old posts about  sin eaters.  Some of those posts might be gone, I’m sorry, but the sin eater was cast our from society, which was the ultimate hardship. So now, many are convinced, life in isolation is the way to go.  They’ve been influenced, I think.

Point is, I needed my husband to trigger me; to stimulate my mind and stir my soul. I am so often seen as a dark figure, I know this. I know I am shadowy, at least it may appear this way online. But one of the greatest gifts a person can give you is to wiggle the root in your psyche, you need to pull.

Should you be mixing it up, more?

43 thoughts on “Isolating Is Horrific If The Goal Is To Evolve”

  1. Absolutely I need to, but I am in a rut.I have a weird way of coping with death. After my Mom died 37 years ago I read the bible incessantly. Luckily that only lasted a few months. Now after the loss of my husband I have locked onto the internet, you tube, anything to keep my mind active. My way of coping.

  2. I don’t like the isolated/digital prison system, but living differently feels like fighting against the tide. I am trying to though, despite roadblocks. Can’t say I’ve mastered it yet.

  3. There’s too much drama when dealing with other people, I find it liberating to be alone. How do we even separate people’s stuff from our own, anyway? Talking about projection here… it is possible to evolve by oneself, especially if you’re very self-aware. Introspection is best done in private, without having to put up with someone else’s projections. This is best done in nature, somewhere in relative isolation from the world, including isolation from the digital world which definitely gets in the way of truly knowing oneself. When I’m around people (family, friends, you name it), it’s as if there are 10 radio stations all on at once, and I’m completely deaf to my own inner self.

    1. I have Libra and an emphasis on the relationship houses so I am always going to want mix it up. But I do agree, people need quite alone.

      Matter of fact, recently I wrote a concise list of advice for younger people and mentioned making sure you’re comfortable being alone.

      My point with this post, is my husband observed something and shared it with me, that did me a lot of good. I personally would not have come up with it in isolation because his lens is different than mine.

      Also, when you’re alone, it’s easy to think you’re right about everything because no one challenges you. There’s never a debate. I realize I have a higher tolerance for this then most. That’s why this blog can exist. But for me it’s about having access to other people’s perspectives, ideas, experience, education, etc. I think these things enhance a life but also, as I said, they encourage growth.

      There’s also the matter of needing help at some point in your life. When you get older, it’s a near inevitability, you need help of some kind. I just feel it’s important to invest in other people but I also understand people are individuals and some will disagree.

      1. My husband and I are old: capacities do erode and our Composite Chart has use e we it’s a Scorpio Ascendent … we appear dangerous! Oh my. For many years we were living in isolation but in public. Rogues moving in a small wheeled home that fit few “normals.”
        Many people didn’t get it/us but a few did.
        In regards to this post, are a couple we challenge one another more than others do and that, like your husband may be the grist that hones our souls. As we age and our Progressed Charts do as well, we are settling in place. Not moving but rooting in community. Real people, real work and that makes the Capricorn Moon in me safe and diligently alone.
        Internet and all us seen of wonder but there’s little that substitutes for real life.

      2. Thank you for your reply, Elsa, it made me reflect on my comment… you’re right, having different perspectives can only lead to growth. I should know, having my Jupiter in the 7th house natally. I guess I’m just going through a rough patch with Pluto entering my 11th house, I need to keep an open mind here, extremes are never good.
        Thanks again!

  4. I think l agree–to a point, but l do some of my best work alone…confrontation with self, l call it. Dreams. Strange symbolic happenings…like yesterday…are sources for the work too. I also get reflections here and have been poked and unnerved too…and l value it. I was made to feel and reflect. I turned off all other social media.l noticed there were too many lost dogs on highways in boxes for my liking…and they all didnt get there by themselves…l dont miss it at all. Filler like fairy floss.

    Other people can be competitive, undermining, not all outside opinions are ‘clean’ and well intentioned. I have Chiron in the 12th part of a fixed grand square with Sun /Moon/Jupiter (Pluto is part of this too (out-of-sign) Virgo on the dsc. from the 6th) trans. Saturn in Picses on the Asc. atm. I have to be careful about carrying ‘others’ stuff for them.
    The idea of the ‘container and contained’ flew in…l havent got the energy to deal with too many ‘others’.
    I agree with Andreea about the noise. Being quiet in nature is my heaven.
    To be quietly with self. To be still and listen while the busy world keeps turning.

    1. PS Trans. Vulcan conjunct my Chiron in Aqu 12th hs. today and Mars conj. Pluto.dsc.

      Yep, l will keep it in-house.

  5. See, I’m not really talking about being still. I’m talking about living on a computer / phone /tv, staring at a screen, not necessarily aware, you are becoming one-dimensional.

    1. Fully agree with with you about the influence of tech. ( l did say that)
      …how do l put this…society and institions encourage, push, force relationship/marriage esp. the traditional sort.l never trusted that set up–and l still don’t. A woman by herself …is not enough. If a man is alone he is not condemmed in the same way. I look at news reports each day–men murdering their partners. DV and no escape. Single mothers’ lives made harder because they are single…and thesecare not small numbers. l have had enough relationships. I dont want to ‘try’ l dont want to ‘settle’ l just want to be…l am more content now without all of that– and more free than l have ever been–even while managing illness. Each to their own.

  6. The Sin Eaters were portrayed pretty realistically in recent Outlander episodes…But you also notice how much community there was in those days, and even in the days of my youth, ’50s and ’60s…and how much has been lost..Maybe that shows up in the mundane astrology?

  7. Elsa, I agree immensely with you. I have worked remotely since March of 2020. I do Tech Support so interacting via phone, chats/texts, and emails. So I have human interaction. I like being alone a lot I discovered! However, I know it’s important to interact in person with real people in real life. Especially as we age. We need to keep being ‘socialized’ or it is a skill we lose.

  8. I’m in hermit mode on purpose right now. Embracing crone season. Reading books, ignoring the tv and electronics except to connect with likeminded folk. I like being a hermit in the true definition of the term. Spent my life having to do and care for others. I’m getting old and and frankly I’ve earned the privilege of checking the f*** out to do what I find rewarding.

    1. Yes, Hermit mode. We both have Pluto conjunct the dec. and Picses rising, Pamela. My chiron in in the 12th in Aquarius. My grandmother was an Aquarian. She was also a double amputee–she was run over by a train and lost both legs….and she lived alone until her late 80s.

      1. Omg your grandmother! Such independence! Yeah I’m in a gentle focused stepping away, if you will, partially out of necessity (health, retirement from work) but mostly to consciously decide what this last time chunk in my life can look like. My favorite Liz Greene quote about the hard ass Pluto Chiron natal opposition:

        “Healing, for Chiron-Pluto, comes with a mysterious blend of hard realism and profound compassion: accepting the world as it is, while avoiding bitterness, passive resignation, and the stance of the victim.”

        Navigating suffering for 60 years beat me down pretty hard but I’m still a hopeful person. I believe in truth and Justice and compassion. Having a smaller daily universe to navigate doesn’t necessarily make the suffering go away, but in the quiet, with less stressful responsibilities, I can actually feel who I am. I’m happily married and have children and grandkids I care deeply about. So I’m not alone in the strictest sense, but being a hermit is calm and filled with possibility. I’m doing the hard work of life review and release. I’m doing what Liz suggests, with deep reflection: “accepting the world as it is, while avoiding bitterness, passive resignation, and the stance of the victim.”

        And like everything it’s a process. But it’s so rewarding. I recommend “Hagitude” by Susan Blackie. Lovely book.

        1. I love that Liz Green quote!
          I didnt make the same choices as you, Pamela. But l am glad you are surrounded by a happy family (perhaps not at this minute, but you know where they are). How about this:Trans. Uranus in my 3rd is sq moon conj. sun now– my neighbour, just had a baby boy. It has given me great joy–that little family. I can feel them glowing.She is a Taurus too.

          My grandmother was no fuss and remarkable she cooked her own meals and kept her own house and garden from her wheel chair until her death. She was never sick. She waited on her death bed for her last child to visit. After which she ordered everyone out…including Doctors…then she died –privately.
          I am going to get ‘Hagitude’.

          1. Blackie’s gender views dont sit well with me…l have seen too much sufering about that.

            It is true that there is no perfection in nature and therefore no perfection in us…

    2. Same here. All of it. I embrace it. I almost forgot how much I love getting lost in a good book. I have taken care of everyone my whole life. I too have earned my little hermit moment. Even when people try to make me feel bad about it. I am doing it anyway. I worked hard all my life to get here… a glass of iced tea, a great book, sometimes sweet music in the background, a great hammock in the shade. My dog sitting by my side. Enough for me. I earned this moment in time. consciously deciding what I want to do with my last little chunk of time too.

      1. It is my power, coming back to me. I remember reading who knows where, in the days of medieval ladies, when a married noblewoman reach menopause and could no longer bear children, some entered nunneries as protected older women. They spent their elder days praying and sewing and living in the peaceful and protected walls of the church. Interesting concept.

  9. I think the best act of kindness that I did for myself was to deactivate my Facebook account. Yes, I lost contact with a few people as I didn’t take details, I was in a rush to deactivate it. Do you know how many attempts it took? Around 9, as the damn app oh so conveniently “timed out” 🙄 but I got there in the end.

    And gained a lot more from it, 90% reduction in anxiety, no more FOMO …. missing out on WHAT exactly? Someone’s cat selfie? Someone’s adorable little darlings in their school uniform, yawn, someone’s amazing meal in a restaurant? Someone’s thoughts on the latest politics? A holiday selfie pic? The latest product to buy? And so on.

    I ended up scrolling for the sake of it, without even taking in or remembering what anyone even posted! And the bombardment of adverts were inane and annoying.

    I enjoy being an “offline hermit on the hill” and ironically being less of a hermit by talking to people face to face or by simple text, it’s better than being an online hermit drooling all over your phone, and not seeing another human being IRL.

    Notice how vacant people are looking now, when they walk down the street, head permanently bowed gawping at their phones like slack jawed zombies.

    I will add some astrology to this when I think of something lol 😂

    1. To be fair I quite liked the cat/dog selfies. But even now I could just click on YouTube and watch “cute kittens compilation”. Or visit my neighbour in person and meet his new feline addition to his family (she sounds like a handful already, always running out of the house! Aww)

      Astrology, maybe to do with Saturn in Pisces? Both share a tendency for isolation, but Saturn is more isolating due to melancholy or depressive states. Whereas Pisces is more about hiding away, secluded, secret or unseen. What better place to hide, than online under anonymity?!

      1. It would be interesting to also look at the sky astrology wise when these media platforms were taking off and also texting via phones started to get big.

        Well said in your comment. I lasted for about 6 months on FB back in 2016 got off of that pretty darn fast 😉
        I remember thinking we are not supposed to have 200+ ‘friends’ and this feels so ‘facebook’y’ – like a book of faces – creepy!

  10. I thought of an example to clarify what I’m trying to say her.

    Take a teenage boy. He’s online all the time, of course. He gets into porn, of course. He’s transfixed with games and nudity… whatever. He fails to establish relationships…dating, romance, I mean. Years pass…

    I don’t thing there is anyway this imaginary young man is going to develop his character in isolation, they way he would if he were grappling with dating, meeting some girl’s parents, etc. Commitment, boundaries, exploration, joy of discovery with a flesh and blood partner…

    Further, it will be nearly impossible for him to catch up. This isolation changes a person’s brain.

    I do feel the internet has flipped and the VAST majority of everything you see or read on the internet is inorganic, simply because what is organic is suppressed.

    So now, think about babies, abandoned by their parents… no one touches them or interacts with them. They don’t develop. It weirds them, basically.

    I’m aware they want robots to care for the elderly; to be your friend and keep you company while you die. The way it’s going; another year or so, I’m pretty sure people are going to say this is their preference… and it may be! Because they are too daunted to interact with a messy human.

    So really, this is fine for the individual to choose, but if it sounds horrifying to you, then maybe invest some time and energy in humans. Someone who cares about you and cares what happens in your life. If and only if, this matters to you.

    1. The problem Elsa with investing time and energy in people today is that many feel betrayed precisely after having been thru the ups and downs of investing and caring for others only to be let down again and especially after these last 3 very divisive years. People walking around nowadays are not of integrity, heart and genuineness. Many have agendas and are very self consuming.

      Personally i think it will take time for many to want to reconnect and that’s just part of it, you have to naturally encounter good hearted folks which is not on every corner of the street.

    2. That’s a really good point Elsa, and I can see what you are saying there. That people have become too immersed in technology that basic life skills, especially basic social and communication skills 101, are being lost, eroded, or severely underdeveloped. To the point it’s become detrimental, as it’s probably rewired our brain’s neural pathways by now.

      As Hazel said, it will take time for many to reconnect, as people will need to learn – or relearn – the skills of how to engage with people in real life from Square One.

      1. Yes, the computer is the companion, people are raised with it and can’t function without it. I know that is stark but think about it. People scroll in their sleep. Four year olds scroll in their sleep.

        Now were we designed to need a device? No. We’re made dependent by design.

        1. I agree completely. Definitely a generation with their attention focused on the digital plane as their primary reality. My own desire to pull away from social media seems like self preservation & a return to simplicity now that I’m over 60.

  11. Yes young ones are attached
    Different world
    I pretty much was on my own after 14 that was 50 years ago.
    They (the young men and women)will grow, body mind and soul
    They will be part of world
    We all might’ve been up and running at 14. I’m thinking 24 ( for these kids) things were different, but we must have the same instincts. Like a wolf brought up in captivity still probably has that instinct to hunt to get what they want , and once out of captivity
    Instincts resume, little slow or out of step but still capable
    This youth just have gap years??
    I hear that word from people experiencing a college plan ?I think it’s gap years for high school kids who haven’t built the plan yet ? just a different world I do think they’re bored of it, I have more time off from work now waiting on my garden. My phone time will go report to me that I use it an hour and 20 minutes it in the worst of times I reached two hours. I think it has to do with the weather this might be the only reason I pick up the phone (Elsaelsa) besides the weather , but so some folks have been a bit of loaners through their work
    I think the shift of very public to more isolated does build one’s faith in oneself, so I see both sides of it I think to your point Elsa it is a different world and folks are missing the old world. I think the human being is still built the same way with the same instincts. Yes, a little controlled manipulated clouded, foggy, floating I’m nervous to say lonely but sometimes you have to see what you don’t have to put something new on the list it’ll work out in the end I suspect.

  12. In Mundane astrology what caused this escape and detachment? Is there a transit that will bring it back? Maybe after a EMP or solar corona? LOL. I dont want that to happen but who knows, the astrologers of the past talked about a cycle every so many thousands of years. If we go thru a huge change, I know humankind will still pull together !

  13. From reading some of the comments, I have to say…it is a different scenario to choose self-isolation when you already have a lot of life behind you, especially if you have a partner (which I would argue is not really being isolated). That is a valid choice. But I think the ideas in this post will be of particular resonance to people who are younger or still feel like they have a lot more to explore out of life and relationships.

    I wouldn’t say I’ve been isolated throughout my life as a whole, I’ve known plenty of people and grown a lot through the interactions I’ve had. But at the same time, I feel like I’ve missed out on some things especially in regards to romantic relationships or feeling a real sense of belonging in a community. I crave deeper, richer connections.

  14. “I am so often seen as a dark figure, I know this. I know I am shadowy, at least it may appear this way online. But one of the greatest gifts a person can give you is to wiggle the root in your psyche, you need to pull.”

    What the heck?! I see you as doing this with Light and unique insight, but I can understand why some people would see it as being dark. 😉

  15. Hello everyone, I can relate to this topic big time, I’ve been in isolation since before the pandemic and recently decided to come out my comfort zone, I decided to isolate cause I needed to recognize me, I needed me back, and I needed to release karmic self undoing! And in isolation I found myself minus the distraction and minus others energies ! Hence today when I step out around others I recognize the energies around me clearly and in turn I can separate the wheat from the chaff in my own world ! Prior to isolation I was lost in a world I thought I knew 😳 all lies 😩 it took me separating and isolating in order for me to recognize even my own thoughts from those of others that kept lingering inside my brain ! So as I isolated I started releasing what isn’t mine and what no longer serves me . Today I feel freedom, peace, compassion and empathy, and a sense of empowerment that can’t be touched ! It’s awesome but it’s also a little of me to have isolated cause I’m a 5 planet Sagittarius ♐️ and you know we don’t stay anywhere ! But this time I had to in order to find me,myself and I and now all 3 are in sync !
    Thanks @ elsaelsa your the best 😘💕

  16. “wiggle the root in your psyche you need to pull”

    This is brilliant. That discomfort is how you grow. Without discomfort you’re just a lump with no spine. That said, we old folks have earned the right to step off the field for a bit, before the big leap out of the body.

    But the art – and the wisdom – comes to play in the choice of when to go out, to connect, or just to expose yourself to serendipity and see what transpires. These days many of us have the freedom and the ability to completely isolate ourselves.

    But when does it shift from the joy of solitude to hiding from life? That’s where wisdom comes to play. Only you can really know the truth.

  17. Just remembering I was told by an electrician that a complete electrical circuit was two electrical entities the phone being one the body being another one having an electrical current within it. It makes perfect electricity so to break that bond it’s hard maybe the phone people cause that’s what we’re all Holding Can invent some breaking electricity feature a healthy break every 45 seconds four minutes hour and 15 maybe that would make it more desired and less programmed ; not so artificially, created more natural and instinctive

  18. I’m with you, Elsa, in that the technology is being used to isolate and numb people. Everyone at home on their devices, separately. No cohesion in the family unless there is a deliberate attempt to put those devices away. Dependent upon outside forces for sustenance. The technocrats think this is useful, for sure. But I think it’s falling apart. When you are hungry you just might have to go ask someone for a sandwich. And that someone only gives you that sandwich of they like you so you better get some relational skills built. I left society after 25 years touching people for a living. I was pretty sick of hearing people complain and not doing something to help themselves. I was taught if you don’t work you don’t eat. So this technology might work for some to live remote and isolated but if you want to feed yourself and family you have to provide something people need. The consumer society is fast failing but as Americans we are a bit behind the curve in understanding it. If we don’t add value to life, life lets us fail. We’re going to see some really harsh things happen in the next couple of years, or decade, depending upon how this rolls out. People will either learn about self sufficiency, or they will die out. But you won’t hear that from sweetness and light prophets. They’re still telling us to manifest something out of thin air. Good luck with that. Now, I’m off to see what I can do “out there” to make sure my family has something “in here”. Thank you, Elsa.

    1. It’s probably more than just “not liking you”. People have become afraid of interacting with others. People are scared of each other, for good reason in many cases. For example, people go out of their way not to see the person who is bringing them something… door dash or whatever. They will close off, even more.

  19. I haven’t been able to read through all the comments yet, but I’ll add that I just experienced this a little. I’m away from home right now in a place where I don’t know anyone and I’m introverted by nature anyway. So I have been looking at my screens a lot (ugh).

    The other day I wasn’t feeling great and started to spiral a bit. I have Pluto and Mercury square, by the way, and let me just tell you, it is NOT a fun aspect. I don’t even realize when I’m starting to go down the whirlpool.

    Anyway, I sent this long text to my husband, who THANK GOD is a hyper critical Virgo (there’s something I never thought I’d say). I ended it with “I hope I’m making sense, it’s hard to articulate this.” He immediately called me and told me I was making no sense at all. Said a few other things, and I was suddenly snapped out of it. He is the Earth to my Water/Air. He’s a ton of bricks.

    So yeah, stay in touch with others whatever the cost. I like to read a lot and I can get sucked into things and start overthinking everything, or losing touch with reality. Walking away from the screen and looking at or hearing another soul is life saving!

  20. 12th Houser, but Gemini Moon. Went to college and peeled the flower that was me off the wall and had a blast. Later, languishing for artsy smart types in my small town, I joined committees. Traveled and loved to talk to strangers on trains & planes. I knew that life was OUT THERE. (9th House Jupiter and Moon!)

    Fast forward to Long Covid! 😣 Work and sleep. Till I bought a VR headset and am more social than ever. Until and if I can ever travel again.

  21. I’m a true ambivert in that I love my own company as much as socializing with others. But this past year was filled with shockingly poisonous incidences with “friends” who were actually my foes. These were close friendships of many years. Imagine the pain and the deep sense of betrayal? Isolating, sure. But I’ve found retreating to my own company just makes the most sense right now while I heal those wounds and find a new sense of emotional equilibrium. It doesn’t mean I have no friends but am much more careful about who I let in. (T. Saturn in 8th squaring my natal Moon in 10th)

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