He (Mercury in Aries) writes recalling our relationship from many years ago:
This is the fight that broke us up then…. It is so stupid! I wanted to go to a party with my friends, alone this time. You wanted to borrow the bike for work or something. I said okay, but do not show up at the party. I wanted to go in a car, and I didn’t want to ride the bike. In fact I wanted to go in Chuck’s MG midget.
You promised you would let me go. Then low and behold, who shows up at the party… Elsa! It rained that day, and you were drenched. You wanted me to ride the bike, and you ride in the MG.
Well I was pissed, because really, you were checking up on me! You couldn’t just trust that I loved you. Well I was looking like a big asshole in front of my friends refusing to ride the bike, and poor Elsa, and everyone loved you, and hell I was pissed OFFFF! I broke up with you then! And it lasted a while!
I respond (Mars Mercury in Libra):
You know…when someone tells you not to show up at a party you’ve got to wonder why. Especially when they like to make you jealous…inflame you in the first place. So I’ve got to show up. I’m not takin’ orders from you! What am I? A patsy??? Some kind of patsy wimp that is going to let YOU dictate to ME. Bullllllllllllllshit.
~~
And I think this is so funny. I’d have been dripping wet…bam, bam, bam on the door of the party. What a fuckin’ idiot! It cost me my boyfriend – oh well!! More of them to be had!!! So what if he got pissed off? No problem!!!!!!!!!!!!
:snickers:
::shakes head::
It’s all so…machismo! In both directions. The control freak trying to control the control freak!
So what about you? If your boyfriend told you not to show up at a party, would you make yourself scarce? Or would you damn the torpedoes and break the door down?
Dear Elsa:
Okay…I’m wondering why he initially felt compelled to instruct you “not to show up at the party”. My guess is this was based on past behavior…that despite his wish to go somewhere independently,(Aries much?), you had showed up there anyway…? Yikes! Sounds like you were asking for a swift kick in the…Don’t get me wrong…back in the day, I indulged in desperado stuff myself, believe you me. In retrospect, I think my Gemini Venus was saying to my beau-du-jour, “Surprise! Here’s a test, baby…are you up to it?” However,it was always a crap shoot as to whether they passed or failed, so, to protect my delicate heart from any unhappy surprises and subsequent dramas, I’ve learned to respect a man’s wishes when he says he wants to be/act on his own. Moreover, there’s some strategic value in the separation,(believe it or not, I’ve no planets in Scorpio!): when he’s so stifled by the mediocrity that’s out there that he can hardly BREATHE, guess which bitch his thoughts turn to? Who ever said you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink? You CAN make him drink if you salt his oats, especially if your oats are extraordinary and if your horse is a Sagittarius Sun Sagittarius Rising Sagittarius Mercury. Think the past 15 years have taught me a thing or two? You better believe it, honey-pie!!!
Of course, cultivating an amazing sense of humor doesn’t hurt either. My philosophy: make your guy feel like you’re on this battlefield called life together, and he’ll always want you telling him where the land mines are hidden. Then he’ll carry you over them!(NATCH!) Semper Fi!!!
I would have said “Okay :)” and gone to 10 parties, without him. I’d make sure to have a really great time with all of my *single* girlfriends and let him know it too lol.
I’d make him pay big time.. and he’d never ask to go alone again 😉
-Scorpio Moon
Actually, I hate parties so much I’d probably be happy to let him go without me.
depends on the circumstances and his reasons. If he can’t provide me with one I would hav dumped his ass and not gone to the party.
Maybe when I was younger I would have gone to the party and made a scene. Now I would just say ‘fine’ and ring one of my other friends, guy or girl, and make sure I had a good time out with them. If some guy expressly told me NOT to show up and he knew my nature, I’d have to infer that he was angling for a public ranting session- maybe he gets off on the fireworks- and there’s no way I would let him get what he wants.
I would say, “You want me to stay away? Fine have a good life.”