Every once in awhile I get a client who wants a deep analysis of their chart. They’ve usually done a lot of work on their own but come to some kind of impasse. I’m working with a gal like this now. She’s doesn’t want to flail around. She wants to crack the nut and get at the nut meat.
With the Moon conjunct Pluto in Capricorn, this is a great day for this. I’m going in.
Have you ever gone through a period of deep analysis? What was the result?
Yes. I did something I rarely do. In analysing a very intense relationship, I read all my journal entries and all our emails from the moment it started. It was almost a year’s worth of material. The result was a much clearer idea of how it all unfolded, and why it is the way it is now. Basically I could see all the ways we tried to control the outcome to our individual benefit, and in the end the outcome was the thing we wanted most in our hearts.
I’m in this at the moment. The biggest thing has been accepting my mother is unable to really love me. My feelings go in waves. Sometimes it is really hard to accept. Sometimes I feel totally fine with it.
I don’t know if I will ever feel different (up and down about it). I know I am really grateful for my therapist.
Another result is being able to see when rejection from another woman, triggers my sadness about being rejected by my mother. I think I’ve been subconsciously been looking for a mother my whole life.
I am now being counseled in becoming my own mother–which fits t.Pluto conjunct 1st House Moon transit. Be my own mother.
If I can stop looking for a mother, I think I will be healthier, overall. I’m getting there.
I expect Pluto stationing on my Moon for several months will either kill me or empower me. I’m gunning for the latter.
Kashmiri, I’m going through something similar. “Be my own mother.” That’s a fantastic insight. Thank you for sharing this.
I went through this last weekend with a friend…she basically told me the truth about how I’ve been believing in illusions in regard to my past love life. She also told me about my ability to fall into denial from time to time. WOW.
She is what I call a true friend.
Traditional psychotherapy with a clinical social worker for several years helped me see that my relationship problems were a result of my partner choice, which was in turn, based on a deep seated ambivalence about being in a relationship at all…. A combination of fear of rejection (Cap stellium) and a need to detach and be free (Sag Moon trine Uranus/Asc, Jupiter/Saturn in Aquarius)
Sometimes I feel like my entire life up to this point has been nothing but deep analysis. But now I hold 80% of the threads and can decide how to use them. I finally feel ready to step up to the plate and live my life, after much too long on the bench. 🙂
Saturn return at 30. The deal with Saturn is that you know what it is. The bad part is doing the work to get where you need to be. I had to stop blaming others and look at myself and do the work necessary to move forward and create a life I needed to survive. I did that with two young children in tow. It was a rough couple of years but in hindsight: I learned, I grew up, moved up, and never looked back. Ouch would be a good definition.
(((kashmiri))) That has to be so hard. I got to the point where I realized that my mother loves “her daughter,” but she’s never bothered to get to know me. Maybe it would be of some comfort to you to know that you have lots of older women (including me) here at EE who just adore you?
My whole chart just screams “DEEP ANALYSIS OR DROP DEAD!” As can be expected, I’m getting deeper and deeper. So far, the period has lasted for 47 years. As for results, I’m still a work in progress.
Painful and enlightening.
Hi Elsa:
I have a stellium in Capricorn. Mars & Moon at 9 degrees Capricorn , along with Saturn at 12 degrees. (My chart is posted on my twitter page @astrologypamela)
Transiting Pluto is exactly on my Mars & Moon right now! As an astrologer, I have known this is coming for along time. And dreaded it.
How does it feel? What am I experiencing? Well first of all, I worried about my health so I had a complete physical and CT scan to see what is going on inside my body. Everything is OK according to the Doctor. There is however, a small cyst growing on my adrenal gland. Benign. (Always have your adrenals checked if you are going through a heavy transits involving Mars! This one I will keep checking every 6 months. So after I found out my health was OK, I have been working out (walking, running, weight lifting) like mad. I have also adopted a clean diet and am doing green smoothies every day. All organic stuff. Emotionally, I have been thinking about my life, my Mother, My self esteem, what I am here to do in this life. Nothing trivial or light. Heavy deep thinking about life. I am hoping that as long as I keep purging (on both a physical & mental level) that this is what Pluto wants from me. That is how it feels. I am also facing being alone from the 1st time in my life. My son will be leaving for school again. So it will be just me, facing my shadow. I am more concerned about when Uranus hits 9 degrees Aries and squares this pair! I hope to live and transform my life. This is awhole lot to handle with Pluto on my big stellium in Capricorn. I’ll let you know how it progresses. So far so good.
Kind regards,
Pamela
First of all, sending love to Kashmiri*
To answer the question. I spend a lot of time, deep in the analysis rabbit hole, maybe too much time. I also tap in intuitively, maybe not often enough lately.
I get a lot right, but I sometimes things wrong too.
My question today: Elsa- on this last Moon conjunct Pluto in Capricorn forever.
If people are not feeling a deep sense of loss, what are they feeling? How does this tie in to Moon Pluto Capricorn?
I can’t speak for anyone else, but I don’t feel a loss.
I feel deeply committed to maintain my integrity, as best I can, on every level. Spiritually, intellectually, physically, emotionally.
It’s heavy.
I love your answer, Elsa. I feel that too.
I’ll add.. The heaviness comes from a sense of responsibility. I prefer to take myself a lot less seriously, but this stuff is conjunct my ascendant.
oh god. i feel that as well.