“Do you not understand, I am not you?” I asked a woman I’m friendly with, yesterday. We’s had a serious conversation, over a two hour period. “I don’t see how you could think I am you or even that I am anything like you.”
“Well, I like recognition. I thought you might like it too.”
“I understand. But you can think again. What you want and what I want are not alike. You shine a spotlight on me, you may never see me again. It’s not a position I’d want to be in. It would have an effect, opposite from what you’re trying to accomplish. I would be mortified to be called out and called up. It is the absolute last thing I would want.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“I know. But you know it now so please call these people off me. And maybe take care, when you assign motives to people for the things they do, you may be projecting. Logically speaking, I have no idea why you would think I am like you. Were from different countries, different generations and our backgrounds are vastly different. I know you love and care about me and I love and care about you as well, but I am simply not the person you think I am. I hope you rethink the assumptions you’ve made and re-calibrate your ideas about me. It should not be hard to do. What I am telling you about myself is not only true, but obvious, if you consider what you’ve observed with your own eyes over the last three years….”
I hope this woman can de-fog her eyes because I really like and respect her. But jeez-Louise, the conclusions people draw about people like me (with Neptune conjunct their midheaven) are freakin’ supernatural.
She is going to call back the award she arranged for me. Gah.
I don’t mind saying this – with a packed 8th house, you turn the lights up on me, I will scatter, just like a roach. My Libra is grossed out by that, but facts are facts.
Do you have Neptune conjunct your midheaven? Can you relate? You may also want to click the tag. There’s a lot of content on this topic.
I have had Neptune transit in quincunx to my MC from 2013 – 2015 ish. That was pretty annoying. Misleading for sure. Vicimizing also – found the worst boss ever and got laid off from the job because my back was in pain for a very long time at that point.
I guess that was a Saturn thing perhaps.
I was easily misled for sure, not to say the fog I was in regarding my career, my choices of job positions and so forth. At the same time, Saturn was crossing my MC in Sag.
Those years… *shudders* It shatterede the foundation (Saturn) of my ideals and idealistic view of who I was, and whom other were (that was a good thing at least). Unfortunately it also eroded the structure of my relationship, but that was built on idealistic, rose-colored glasses I think, and had no solid foundation, but my career suffered from my choices because of this transits so yeah…
My relationship to Neptune is not good after those years. I can’t stand the planet for most parts, as my boundaries from the 1st house (which Neptune has transitted in both Aquarius, Pisces and will until 20 degrees Aries) has subconsciously made me attract men who was good at just taking advantage of my body because my resolve and boundaries were sorta dissolved and I ended up feeling like a victim. It bloody hurts. But at least I try to be more conscious of my boundaries now, but really? I think Neptune is a a real PITA a lot of the time.
Yes, it’s supernatural, it’s the claim to fame. Blessing and a curse.
I know a Leo Sun with a packed 8th house…I know what you mean by someone attempting to shine a light on you, and scattering like a roach. When someone tries to talk about her in a friendly way in front of others, you should see the way she reacts. I bet you guys have that similar look of tenseness in your faces when people try to do this to you.
Is it in some way because of control or lack of control over the situation?
No, Goldie. They want to call me up in front of a group and give me an award, because they imagine I want (seek) recognition which is exactly what I seek to avoid.
Now seriously. I am constantly shot at. Do you really think I want to be thrown up like skeet? PULLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
No thank you. Where’s the door? The nearest door, and you may never see me again.
Whenever I see one of those big wedding proposals, with a flash mob or something? I die inside. Way to put a woman on the spot, jackass!
I realize there are women who might like that. But people should realize just because they like something doesn’t mean others do.
haha me too
Me too! Quiet and private works for me.
Interesting, thanks.
I don’t have Neptune in aspect to Midheaven so it’s fortunately not a public issue with me but oh. My. God. My sister used to do this to me all the time. I have Mercury conjunct Neptune (orb 0 degrees) in 3rd house. She is a 1st house Leo Sun. It’s still unclear to me whether it was intended as humiliation or if she really thought I’d enjoy being put on the spot, but she would do things like tell her friends I could sing and then try and make me. I have Sun conjunct Uranus, 1st house Pluto and all but Moon are below horizon in my chart. Of course I don’t like to be put on the spot on my own, I need some support, I’m like one of the singers in a duo/trio.
I’ve been pretty prone to projecting stuff myself too, so these days I try to be understanding of it and immediately let people know if something’s just not comfortable for me. I used to get irrationally angry and upset if I was put on the spot and I somehow failed as a consequence, so I’ve come some way. I also managed to set boundaries to how I let my sister treat me back when Saturn was in Libra.
I’ve had transiting Neptune conjunct MC in Pisces opposing my natal Pluto conjunct IC in Virgo for a couple of years now… this transit has taken a hell of a toll on my career with people projecting their fear and anger about their own shortcomings onto me. Unfortunately my business was quite Virgoan in nature, requiring lots of precision and detail orientation. I was good at it, but “never good enough.” I closed it down at the end of 2017 because the stress and negativity I was getting from clients was killing me. My new business is Piscean rather than Virgoan, which I hope is the antidote for that.
Our society doesn’t teach us that people are different. I’m sorry, but it just doesn’t. It’s mostly about ‘fitting it’ and competing with everyone else, so that’s why people act like they do.
And why people made the assumptions they did with you.
That’s disappointing. But not everyone is like this. I’m really quite surprised.
I’ve already moved off to the fringe. Hopefully, I’ll be able to hang on, ignoring the impulse to retreat even further.
I guess it’s called an unspoken rule/assumption. I’d say it’s more of an assumption rather than a rule, though.
Nothing wrong with being a fringe dweller… I’m one myself. Fringe dwellers are the coolest, most interesting people. Too bad they are hard to find irl and harder to know.
I’m a Leo sun with Gemini rising so you’d think I’d love the spotlight but I have Neptune square my natal sun and I just don’t.
Hey Elsa
My Neptune in Saggitarius is somwhere close to MC and opposes also my Sun which is. Obviously conjunct my IC.
I do a lot of important things profesionally but I am not seen by the people, like is the fog, I work in the background.I am afraid of fame.
When I had Neptune transit on my Aquarius ascendant I was deeply involved in spirituality and unreadablw for coworkers , friends and so on.
Scorpio Neptune on the MC here and oh man! I would run and hide if someone did that to me. UGH!! I hate anyone calling attention to me for any reason.
I have moon 10th, near MH square Neptune in 1st. I am very private about my life. I understand.
I always had an issue with the old so-called ‘golden rule’ which states ‘treat people as you yourself wish to be treated’. That’s fine as long as it stays at the higher order of things, like respect and compassion, but I have had all sorts of things imposed on me by well-meaning people, and it actually makes me suffer. A lovely friend who insists on hugging and kissing me several times throughout every occasion we are together … I hate this! And, yes, I have asked her not to. Insistent invitations to social gatherings which will be loud and crowded… I hate these sorts of events. I am careful not to mention when my husband is away, because friends think I will be lonely and want company. No, I don’t. I love some quiet time on my own. We don’t all want the same things.
This is so helpful!
Seven years ago I moved to a new state and suddenly felt painfully private and socially uncomfortable. I thought it was all the endless, kind but overwhelming “welcome to town” stuff, but no: my relocated chart has Neptune conjunct the MC. Just grokked this. I guess this is not a phase (everything has been cycling through my 12th house); it seems like it is my new reality.
True, people are projecting their picture shows all over me – but that just gives me cover. Kind of a relief to see this. I am actually reveling in the idea. My Pisces Sun and 8th house moon/Pluto are thrilled too. I am a happy hermit!
Astrology is so beautiful.
Thank you for writing this. I feel exactly the same way. I dreaded having a wedding and was relieved to get married at City Hall. I hate the spotlight, just leave me in peace. I have a strong 12th house with Neptune in the 1st, and I would react exactly like your packed 8th house – scatter.
I admire successful YouTubers, they put up with thousands of nasty troll comments every day. They hire people to take care of it for them. I can only imagine what an award would dredge up. Shudder.
Good for you Elsa, you spoke your mind eloquently.
What would you say would be the difference between Neptune conjunct the Midheaven and Neptune conj. Asc. out of curiosity?
This would play out most noticeably in one on one relationships. Me / We.
The midheaven is public confusion…
Yes that ‘s true. I have it all my life?
Thank you. Quite helpful!
I tend to see the Asc/Desc. axis (who I am or how I choose to act vs. what I both get back and partners I choose, Me vs. relationship I create with others) and feel that axis best, and relate the IC best with the Midheaven (Home vs. Work, personal and private life vs. public life and “reputation”?, and for some reason, the impact you leave on your life now vs. the impact you want to leave that outlasts you). I may have created amalgamations from the signs those corners are associated with though.
Neptune always makes me think of projections (bidirectional) and a sort of fog – where things are hazy, but also with the capacity to morph and go beyond your realities, your limits, your experience. I’m still trying to learn (and use) the positive it brings.
My own experience with Neptune conj. the Ascendant is often coming on (or being seen) as not who I am (however clear I thought I was). Also, a definitive capacity to adapt in groups and “blend in” if I so wish. It’s definitely something that works much better as you get to know your (real, undeniable) self though.
Thanks!
I can relate to you, Kittens. When Tr Neptune was in the Aquarius portion of my 1H, I (1H) was almost invisible (Neptune) by others (Aquarius). Talk about a wallflower!
Now that Neptune is transiting its home sign of Pisces, I am “seen” (1H) as a sensitive (Pisces), intuitive (Neptune) woman.
With 8th house Neptune trine my Gem Sun and Pisces Asc I gush over recognition so much that I make myself sick. (Blush). Three Leo planets in the 6th bring the kudos at work/in public and coworkers/friends hate me for that. Oh well, nothing I can do. Haha.
Neptune in the ninth, but close enough to be conjunct midheaven. I don’t enjoy the spotlight in general, only with my close friends and family, but that could be 7th house Leo moon. I’m a massage therapist and also incorporate various forms of energy healing, thought perhaps that was influence of Neptune conjunction Midheaven. Have my own business and work one-on-one with clients, which I enjoy. I don’t advertise much and prefer to fly under the radar.
When Neptune (ruler of my Asc.) danced back and forth over my MC I hid (Sun, Merc, Venus in 8th) my deep emotional pain (Moon/Pluto) of a failed marriage (transit. Uranus conj. 7th-house ruler) behind various theater roles – mostly dramas and musicals. As Neptune moved further into my 10th, my work moved off stage and back to the drawing board. I don’t like the spotlight unless I’m in control of it’s direction. And once it’s off, I’m gone. (I generally detest overhead or bright lights; will always flee to the dimmest place in the room.)
Elaine, that is well put. My mother too projected her dreams and wishes on me all my life and we could not have been more opposite. We are both (or she was) Scorpio’s and her Neptune was in Leo so she had very high demand and dramatic ideas for me, which made me want to run for the hills! I as once working for a fashion designer (famous), and she sent me a book on “Secrets of CEO’s”….What??? The cover had some elderly looking Statesman on the front. I had no idea what she expected me to do with this book, because I didn’t read it. Also everyone in her life was elevated to a status above what they actually did for work- ie a line cook was “he’s such a fine chef!” to someone who was just starting to dabble in art she knew “could be shown in the Guggenheim”. I think she really wanted to be seen and to see others in their best light, but it was pretty unsettling sometimes in their company when she would say this stuff.
Years ago my boss called me up in front of everyone at a conference to give me flowers and show appreciation for my hard work as I was one of the “quieter members of the team”. I wanted the ground to swallow me up. Neptune Conjunction MC, Venus Conjunction MC, Venus Conjunction Neptune.
“I don’t mind saying this – with a packed 8th house, you turn the lights up on me, I will scatter, just like a roach. My Libra is grossed out by that, but facts are facts.”
Exactly why I eloped.
Well, I am new to this site, but just had to post on this one. I have moon in pisces in the 10th house trine neptune, opposing Pluto. I have definitely, slowly, as I’ve gotten older, come to realize that people see some kind of projection when they see me–very frequently. Sometimes, I have had a kind of shy movie star vibe, where people see me as something “starry” and they put me on a pedestal. And sometimes people react super negatively to me, and they do create rumors or gossip or do weird stuff. And sometimes they lash out when I don’t even know them at all. Sometimes they really love me though I don’t really know them. Sometimes I am “high” status wise, and sometimes (more lately), I feel “low” and kind of hidden. I do think I have a kind of “uniform” I now wear as an image to kind of protect myself — because when I was younger I really thought it was my fault and I blamed myself when I became suddenly unpopular, and even wondered if some of the mean things were true. I have a ton of Libra and like to please. Now, I feel more detached and recognize the patterns and know when to step back and let other people get out in front and not let my ego get too worried about the negativities. I just kind of slip out the back as much as possible when that starts to come. I do feel that my career has been to be “of service” as a teacher and to help people voice things they have a hard time voicing–I help people tell their stories. So I resonate a lot. I think reading through these Neptune posts has really clarified for me what I kind knew but wasn’t naming in terms of astrology. Kind of a relief to have it confirmed in some way. I’m not crazy! 🙂 Thanks Elsa!
I can relate! Neptune officially hit my MC this month. I already have Pisces there, so I assume the 10th house transit will be the same old stuff, only moreso. Gee, terrific. I’ve never been the world’s most ambitious person, but I do have some plans I’d like to see come to fruition, and I JUST GOT DONE with Saturn in Sag in the 6th hitting all my mutable planets for 2+ years.
As for career issues, I work in the restaurant industry and am so FED UP with my slacker co-workers. Lots of Pisces types, i.e., a bunch of drunks. I get so tired of being the responsible one. Also we’ve had a near-total change in management and things are in a state of flux, with almost no one in charge, and things are a mess.
My side job—right now more of a hobby—is writing romance novels. I self-published four books under Saturn’s recent transit through Sag and none took off, sales-wise. Those were my “learning experience” books. Heh.
Now I’ve been inspired to write a rock and roll romance trilogy, and the two books I was “supposed to” write for 2018 have taken a back seat. The music biz — lots of Neptunean characters, but I’m loving the research! It takes place in the ‘70s (ah, era of my happy childhood!), so I’ve been getting very nostalgic and listening to lots of good tunes.
Also very reflective. It’s shown me a lot of the Neptunean parts of my character I didn’t realize I had (surprise, surprise). My Jupiter is in Gemini in the 12th, exactly opposite my Sun (no wonder my head’s full of fictional characters whose lives I try to put down in words). Also, my N node is in the 12th, and then Saturn is in Pisces in my 9th high up near the MC. Oh, and my Moon is conjunct my natal Neptune in Scorpio in the 5th house of creativity. So, yeah, lots of imagination (and insecurity), but not a lot of ambition.
Like many of you, I shudder at the thought of being thrust into the limelight.
That’s why I’m planning on publishing my new project under a pseudonym (how Neptunean is that!) because I feel I may be able to lower my inhibitions in my storytelling, and also because I think I may take it less personally if it doesn’t do very well. I can’t bear to read the reviews of the books under my own name (though they’re mostly good, but not great).
Also, I stink at promoting and wonder if I’d do a better job if I weren’t doing it under my real name and persona?
Tenth house can also have to do with the parents, especially the father. My dad has Parkinson’s and recently he’s developed dementia and gets confused about a lot of things.
This is me. Neptune on MC in Sag, square sun/mars/pallas in intercepted Virgo, chart ruler uranus in 8th. Recently expelled from my roller derby team via toxic HBIC and assorted minions, who totally projected all kinds of nefarious motives on both my attempts to help the club get better and my attempts to stay above the increasing hostility. Finding this type of natal chart info helps a ton, it puts my experience in a context I can understand as somewhat inevitable, vs. feeling bad about it as purely personal.
Oh man Elsa! I can relate. I don’t have Neptune on the MC but my mother did. She also had her Moon in the 12th. She exaggerated everyone’s abilities/profession to the point of embarrassing them. She would place people on pedestal to high for them to uphold the standard. And she merged our desires all the time. She would call me up and as what I was going to do that day. I would reply “oh not much. It’s nice and sunny in the apartment so I am going to open the windows and clean (moon in virgo..lol). “What dear? You are going to stay inside on a beautiful day like today? Don’t you want to go to the beach or call a friend and go to lunch?” I would say “No, not really. I have plenty to do.” “But dear! Don’t you get lonely?” I am a 12th House Sun! I don’t get lonely! But she always asked me that question because she projected her wants and needs onto me. She had compassion coming out of her ears though I can tell you that.
Totally understand.
Right now I am trying to explain to people I don’t need to be sat with in the hospital. Arrrrgh. 🙂
Right? You will need your rest. Hospitals are noisy enough, interupting your time to heal day and night. Folks coming in and out can be annoying. But they are helpful if you can’t get a nurse to come help you get up or something?
Absolutely relate!
matter of fact, last night, I was being introduced and the host turns to me in front of a large crowd, and said, “you’re name again—Darlene?” And yes, my jammed 8th house replied, “call me, Neptune”, with a twist of humor in my voice. My partner started laughing and after explaining to me–“when the host went to introduce you it’s as if his memory went blank.”
oh well. carry on. go away… 🙂
Neptune conjunct the MC, Scorpio. My default pedestaling statement: “I think that is very nice of you to say, but this isn’t necessary.”
(barf)
Welcome, Imhotep.
I have 10th house Neptune conduct MC in scorpio. what job / course should O go for please and thank you. alek$