With Saturn in Libra, what I am noticing now is that people are really finding out where they are as far as relationships go and many if not most feel quite compromised. A gal on the boards just mentioned she wants to stop her divorce, her husband says no. Another man I know of cheated on his wife for a decade and it’s all come home to roost… now.
I know of a man divorced with two children. He’s so tired trying to see his kids and work enough to make child support payments, it’s a terrific impediment to forming a relationship with another woman. Another man had a fling with a woman he didn’t like that much. He know has a child he loves and a broken family that never was in the first place.
Some are realizing they are on a viscous cycle on the dating sites. Some are rethinking the idea of leaving their husband for a screen name on a computer screen and others are realizing they best get out because the next beating may be the one that kills them.
Most definitely there are people lowering their standards, in some case because their standards were not realistic but in other cases, because they realize they just don’t want to be alone. Others are raising their standards because they realize they’ve been letting any horse into the barn.
Some are happy or course – I am but I worry about my husband’s health and I surely don’t take him for granted.
What all these scenarios have in common is this: Love meets reality, yes?
How is your love?
my love is getting a face-lift and a new foundation not built on sand.
Here’s another story
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/deidre/3571340/Deidre-Daily-Drama-Famous-singer-doesnt-know-Im-his-real-dad.html
Thank goodness my relationship is solid- I’m very grateful because I’ve been in more than a few that weren’t. I too worry a bit about my husband’s health (my own as well), we’re not getting any younger, after all.
Right, CArRiE. Everyone is getting knocked back by this, one way or the other. It’s a marvel to watch, especially at my age because I vividly recall Saturn’s last transit through Libra.
Family relationships are mostly fine. I just had another argument with my mother over something that she dropped on me this evening, but other than a couple of small, heated exchanges, we were both adjusting to the other one’s point of view, and ended up arguing in favour of the opposing view.
Anything else that comes along, I’ll deal with. I’m veering between calm, heavy feelings and feeling just plain obnoxious. Self-respect is an issue, and I was thinking that with one man, I might be putting myself into a situation I’ve been in before, that I don’t want to repeat. Maybe Saturn is helping to balance out the Neptune/moon transit, as I’d hoped.
My love is non existant. 🙁
Funny you mention this Elsa, just today I was looking at my chart from late 80 to early 81. Saturn is Libra was also tangled up with Jupiter and Pluto. Amazing energy this time around. Proof that deja vu does exist.
Like you, Elsa, I vividly remember the last Saturn in Libra; that’s when I got married~~~still married, happy to say!
Oh Elsa, did you feel that saturn’s transit through Libra the last time also brought to the fore the same(ish) relationship, love, respect, compromise type of issues?
My love life* sorry haha
Scarce these days that’s for GD sure!!!!
“Oh Elsa, did you feel that saturn’s transit through Libra the last time also brought to the fore the same(ish) relationship, love, respect, compromise type of issues?”
Well, I am with the same man now I was with then (and opted out) but besides that, I remember the MOOD and am tempted to pull up story from the archives to illustrate. You guys would flip. I have not had this story public in 8 years or so.
Raised my standards here, and they were high to begin with. Were they too high at too young an age? Maybe. Opted for being single out of sheer pissed offness at the QUALITY out there. When i met a good one, it was MY immaturity, lack of quality………
Yeah, they’ve come home to roost. It’s like a saturn return over here. Lol. A saturn trine. 🙂 So maybe my own quality here is on the rise too.
Interesting.
I’ve mostly been staying the hell away from relationships. But now you’ve got me thinking… I think I was doing that during the last Saturn in Libra. I was very young, mind you. But I think I was as unsettled then as I am currently. (Not necessarily always in between.)
Food for thought. Food for thought. I think, in fact, I’ve been doing a lot of obsessing about what is a relationship. What that looks like for me.
This is a great reminder post, Elsa. Thanks.
Love meets reality, true. M and I broke up the day Pluto trined my Venus, 3/15. It was a situation in which he treated me in a way that made me feel very much taken for granted. I didn’t throw a fit – I just left. Instead of just dropping it, he continued to text me every day and act like he gave a damn about me. We’ve had a few dates in the last couple of weeks, and it seems he’s back, full-on.
I’ve been dating others in the meantime. Wonderful dinners, sparkling company, meeting the movers and shakers about town. VIP skyboxes. Concerts. But who’s there in the trenches, wishing me a happy Mother’s Day and asking me if it bothers me that it’s not my week with the kid? Him. Who drove ten miles midday to sign my kid up for a great summer program because I couldn’t take off work to do it that day? Him. Who remembered that I had a hard meeting to go to and texted something hilariously inappropriate three minutes before I went in to loosen me up? Him.
He doesn’t do ANYTHING classically romantic like the other ones do, but what he does do is much more real and seems much more like love and caring. I’ll have to give up one to have the other. Of course, there are other issues involved… The point is, I’m weighing everything very carefully.
Oh, and retro Pluto just trined my Venus again on Saturday night, the night of our first date since we broke up. Astrology is amazing.
And by “date,” I meant “sex.” 🙂
My love life is going well–best it’s ever been in my life. His Mars is in my Mercury-ruled 7th House. We talk a lot. It’s good love all around but I’ve realized in the last few months that talking/communicating is what I have been craving for years. I always had relationships with mute men before.
Every week I come out of my therapy appointment, he is waiting. Wants to go for coffee and hear everything I feel like sharing. He’s so lovely. I do worry about his health but really this is a mutually supportive relationship and it is so nice!!
Del when t.Pluto trined my Venus/Mars I had my first orgasm. LOL. I love sharing that–big Saggie mouth I am.
Oh yeah–and it was in the WORST relationship, ever. Ever. Biology is a mind bender.
I’m realizing that nothing is really perfect. Sometimes “good enough” is just that. What seemed so idyllic at first didn’t turn out so hot the with the ex, so I’m realizing now that what this one offers me is JUST what I asked for – just different than what I was expecting. It’s time to be realistic in love, that’s for sure.
The last time around Saturn was in Libra (in my fourth), my folks divorced and there were multiple house moves. You’re right, Del… astrology is amazing.
Same as it ever was…
Kash – you’re back! I’ve missed you! Or were you posting by another name? There were some posts that seemed to have your “voice.” I’m not on here all the time so maybe I missed something. Anyway, love you and your big Sag mouth! *mwah*
Natalia: “different than what I was expecting…” I hear you.
Great writting Elsa!!!
Thanks Del. I was posting incognito (bad incognito) for the past 18 months or so:) Mostly to pretend it wasn’t me making all those posts all over Elsa’s blog, hee!
Oh man Elsa, what timing. Today I had a performance review at work—-and my boss and I mostly talked about the issues that I last consulted with you about months ago.
For me, the most pressing issue is how to set the appropriate tone and work ethic as a member of a TEAM. I am making progress, mostly because I no longer can get away with “showing ’em all by doing it all.” Classic Libra downfall.
I feel motivated, is all I can say. The challenge is now in stark relief, but so is the road ahead.
Thank you Elsa!
I’ll never fully enjoy the first shock of any Saturn transit but I definitely have learned to accept what reality it may bring into my life, having learned that the compassionate face of Saturn only shows after the lessons are learned (or else they would be nullified). But it’s not the evil force I used to think I felt breathing down my neck.
So with the people I kicked out of my life– I disowned my father after 27 years of bullshit, and have sealed my ex-partner out of my life for good– I am finally free to see how the patterns I was caught in were not my fault (the dating site abuse, et all). I think by times Saturn wants you to learn that you AREN’T supposed to take responsibility for everything, especially people who want to continue hurting you and then assign you the responsibility of owning their shadow. NO THANKS. I’m perfectly content now taking care of myself emotionally and financially until a partner comes along who truly complements me and vice versa… I’d prefer to let life do the picking on that one now. As a Saturn-ruled, I do better when I let events unfold on their own in my “romantic” life.
Elsa– I am curious whether you see the same themes crop up this time around as during the last Saturn in Libra, or other things are highlighted because of the cardinal cross years.
Oops, debdeb already asked that!
This is a great post Elsa. I’m seeing many of these issues at the moment.
Just over a year ago I got rid of the ex that was making my life a misery and met my perfect man a couple of months later when (our) Saturn was at 27 deg virgo.
Much of our relationship thus far has been with Saturn in libra, and it feels very REAL. It’s not a disneyland relationship – we have to take into account his son from a previous relationship, and he’s currently out of work. But he is attentive and loving and I realise it’s what I’ve always wanted – lots of physical affection and support that I can offer back.
Aside from that, my relationships at work are all over the place. I’m in a senior position at the moment, and people are taking objection to the fact that someone who used to be very junior is now on a par or more senior to them. My issues are swinging from being too nice to being accused of being rude.
This is magnified because saturn is exactly opposite my natal mercury (in the third) so communication is coming up as an issue 😉
Oh and Kash – just checked my transits from a few months back. T. pluto was trine my mars and sun when I had my first O too 😀
I’m happily on the other end of the spectrum you just described 🙂
But if it weren’t for you and this site, and the wonderful advice I’ve gotten here I could very easily be suffering along with these people.
My love was doing great till October – when saturn crossed his ascendent – it is crappy now – and I am afraid it may be over
you are right on with these posts. I am really going through something here – so at the very least it gives me comfort to see it up there in black and white and I can say – ah…well at least this is a cosmic lesson
For him he is being an ass – but I see what is coming – in October Saturn will conjunct his moon in Libra and Uranus will again conjunct his aries Sun
and in 2013 Uranus will conjunct his descendent, Pluto will conjunct his IC, and saturn will travel his second house – this living arrangement with his ex – this separationg thing – will end finally
I don’t know how I got talked into this thing with him
@maureen – you’re welcome.
@Shaina – same issues as far as IN….. or OUT but there is more focus on survival this time around due that cross.
My love life? Very “get thee to a nunnery”, as usual lol. All the guys around here either have a felony, a kid or an addiction. Or all three.
I think I’m too young really to have a rightful say…. but I feel completely and utterly underwhelmed AND overwhelmed. Under – due to how things have turned out, over – that it can just be like this. I thought the Universe was meant to fill voids – so far I can see tumbleweeds in my love life. I’ve tried, lord knows I’ve tried. I’m tried rekindling with exs, I’ve tried looking for someone new. I’ve had the best relationship ever, only to stuff it up for the worst one ever. But the best one HAD to end for practical reasons.
Now I wish the one I truly desire would wise up on his behaviour and for it to benefit me. However, the waves of fate have made him wise up after me for a reason, and for whoever comes next.
Oh well.
It was with this transit, when I was small, that my wariness with men started, and my anxiety issues started (Pluto was there, too).
Well, it’s not an issue for me, but I wonder how my mom and her new Internet Boyfriend are going to do once the reality hits. For example, he doesn’t know she’s a hoarder and he’s not going to find out any time soon since he lives in another state– and their first date together is in another city entirely from where either of them live. THAT SHOULD BE INTERESTING. If the man’s willing to put up with that…
“My love is non existant.” Hey debdeb, i hear ya!
yes, love meets reality. it is poignant. i am happy right now not being tied to anyone other than my son and my friends and family. i was in a dream for several years, checked out, and now i am REAL enough to appreciate what IS real in my life.
My Venus in Libra feels like a chair missing a leg without a relationship. I imagine this will only make me stronger, but this is the hardest corner of my life I’ve turned thus far. And my life has been less than magical. Still…what’s the alternative? Rejecting the lesson? My Taurus ASC/Moon is so pig-headed about it all. “Ok…I’ll do this. But I won’t like one second of it…”
Never had a love life to beginning with..
Probably a lot of unrealistic expectations on my part and also I need to feel something before I get involved (Moon conjunct Venus and Mars in Pisces). The last person I felt something for was not a great guy! Also I have Saturn ruling my 7th house and conjunct my 5th house cusp and conjunct Pluto.. so I’m maybe a late bloomer. Almost going through my 1st Saturn Return and I’m not having the time of my life right now… My Saturn is in Scorpio.
Since the beginning of Libra Saturn, I’ve been working on my appearance right now but I still feel lonely at times.
I met a guy last year but I felt nothing for him but he was a great guy.. I didn’t want to use him as a filler for my loneliness so I told him that he was amazing but it just wouldn’t work. I’m learning as much as I can about relationship but it’s hard to do without experience or hands-on knowledge.
Whenever a friend has a relationship issue and asks me for advice, I feel kinda dumb.. First I don’t think they take what I say seriously because I have no experience and secondly, I try being fair for both side but I still feel that whatever my answer is, it’s pure logic and not experience knowledge..
Even if Libra Saturn trine my Sun, it’s not a really happy time for me right now.
compromise is def the theme of my relationship. I compromised myself by thinking that marrying a guy who was nice and would be a good father would be a good thing. I looked over the real “romantic” type of love because i was so hurt in the past. I figured this would be good, but really after 15 yrs and a constant struggle- because I am an Aries w/ Sag rising- he a Cancer with libra rising- I am worn out.
These past few months have put it all in a big window for me to see again- yes I am tired of being in a relationship that seems like constant work without any real payoff for me. I would rather be in one that is more harmony in what works for me. Oh and compromise now big time since we are in a tight financial state that even if I thought of getting a divorce its out, I would not be in a great situation for my kids- eventhough I make more money its all the other stuff I have to deal with that would make it worse.
So I am playing it out for another few yrs- maybe it could turn around.. who knows but really- I think my mind/foot has been out the door for years now.
What does Pluto trine Venus mean? Bc I’m thinking that had to happen in my very strange birth chart. I really need to post it on here to see if I get any responses to it. I didn’t know there was a place one could do something like this. Actually found this site today via Suzi (Starcana or Cosmic Dirt). You guys may want to check her site & subscribe to her Daily Cosmic Dirt bc I promise you she’s so dead on it’ll sometimes freak you out!!! She’s a very genuine and honest psychic as well.
It’s the same as it ever was, and by that I mean completely nonexistent, as it has been for 3 1/2 yrs now.
Wow @Del, that’s intense. I hope your weighing things/thinking about things go well, good luck!
@Elsa, Yea Elsa, please pull it up! I’m really curious! Both about the libra saturn thing, and about your choices from the past (with regard to the husband)!
In terms of lowering standards or raising them, I think in my case it’s definitely high time to raise them. I’m too nonchalant all the time, I think as I’m growing older (growing up haha, I forget the age range on these boards sometimes :)), it becomes really important to not just enter relationships for the sake of them – but to do so when it is ‘right’ for me.
And so much of what is ‘right’ is outside of one’s control – but one thing you CAN do is put some thought into the man and into his actions, and into your interactions. So, perhaps it is high time I began to raise, or to have, some standards now.
Thanks for this post Elsa