She’s Destructive In Relationships – Part Two

Hi again, Challenged.

My other idea, is that you get yourself some astrology. See, here’s how it works, in astrology but also in life.

People affect each other. You know how you meet someone and like them right away? That happens when they have planets in their chart compatible with your own. And it works in reverse as well. How many times have you met someone and you just plain don’t like them? They rub you the wrong way? You don’t trust them, pretty much on sight? Well, this happens when you come across a person with planets in nasty aspect to your own.

Now obviously it’s not clean cut like that. People are complex! So when you meet someone they make you feel good in one area, but leave you wanting in another. If you have the charts in hand, you’d have a brilliant map of the relationship – of the interaction. But don’t tell the people who don’t believe in astrology this, because it will upset them greatly. 😉

So anyway, your stellium in Virgo… Moon, Pluto, Uranus and Jupiter is very tight. By that I mean, the planets are bunched together. So when you go out the world, when you meet someone who has a planet or two in aspect to your stellium, there is going to be an acute reaction and this is for good or ill.

For example, if you meet someone with Mars (raw male energy) in nasty aspect to your stellium… well they are going to be the match that lights you on fire. And do you need that when you’re trying to go straight? You don’t.

Saturn is another planet to watch. If you try to run with someone who has their Saturn in hard aspect to your stellium, they will constantly be trying to control and contain you and you can imagine how that’s gonna go over, right? So here’s what I would do.

It’s a very simple matter to learn which years Saturn was in bad aspect to the late degrees of Virgo… and if I were you this is exactly what I would do, with the intention of avoiding these people whenever possible. And you know what?

A lot of astrologers would be on my ass about this. I know this for sure because whenever I bring this up among them, I am criticized.

The main criticism is the idea that we are here to learn and the people with planets in hard aspect to our own teach us. Well I think that’s fine. But do the people saying that have to deal with what you are trying to deal with? Maybe not. Because I’ll tell you what I think.

I think it’s akin to being an alcoholic trying to stay off the booze. Must you live in a booze filled world? Yes. But you don’t have to spend your days and nights in a bar, do you? Of course not. So it’s like a non-alcoholic telling the recovering alcoholic they ought to expose themselves to alcohol on a daily basis, otherwise it’s avoidance. ::laughs::

So anyway, you’re highly combustible, this is a fact. And as part of trying to navigate this, I suggest you find out where these triggers are. Who is a match to your puddle of gasoline?

If you know how to do this, then you’re in. Otherwise, pay an astrologer to tell you, or better yet, to teach you. It would be money well spent, I promise you that.

Good luck.

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11 thoughts on “She’s Destructive In Relationships – Part Two”

  1. Maybe this is why I read Elsa so much. She tells you things “other astrologers” would disagree with. Although I’ve had long discussions with my father, an astrologer, and his advice often runs along the lines of look to your chart or their chart to see the way through a problem. Or that some people just don’t work with you. If you’re trying to live a life of peace, compassion and a bit o happiness I say use every tool and resource at hand. You aren’t the Dali Lama if you’re struggling with relationships – use what you’ve got and maybe next time around you’ll be in line for lama-ship 😉 Otherwise, hey I agree with Elsa. 🙂

  2. Bravo Elsa ! learning to play the eccentricities of our individualities just like playing a musical instrument we become artists of ourselves. no arguments from this astrologer…

  3. I agree with you (a lot), and I agree with ‘them’ (a little).

    Lord knows enough ‘challenges’ come our way anyway, so dealing with those that we didn’t/can’t manage to avoid keeps us busy enough. So most of the time, I’m with you: steer clear of the obvious problem people/situations, especially when you’ve got your hands full with other issues already (or just need/want to enjoy a well-deserved quiet, peaceful spell).

    Then, every once in a while, when I am feeling ‘strong and capable enough’, I intentionally allow/let in a ‘challenging person’, as a ‘learning experience’. What I have learned though, is that I don’t have to keep that ‘challenging person’ onboard ‘forever’. Learn the lesson then cut them loose and move on.

  4. I have to agre, this is part of the attraction of Elsa. A strong voice that speaks clearly and openly, but not too much. I think the need for astrologers to be understood as nonjudgmental counsellors fuels these opinions about difficult interactions, but no few experienced astrologers are going to form relationships with people who obviously represent ‘extreme’ interactions. (unless they choose or are swept up in that sort of journey)

    For an astrologer, the limits of choice are one of the greteast theoretical/philosophical questions to explore, but also realities to play/work with in the context of living.

    If one’s chart is difficult, mixing harsh combinations with others isn’t always the wisest thing to do. Astrology is a tool for discernment rather than discrimination, and can be applied without masochistic martydom to other people’s burdens.

    The longer I practice, the clearer this becomes. With a very gentle mutable stellium, I have a hard time with 1966. But my more active self always takes into account the finer points of 1952 and ’82. But if you have a sensitive point conjunct the Cardinal axis, a wide berth might be in your best interest (unless you really like a challenge). It’s a careful negotiation and can always be considered in the context of and transits, or other dynamic, predictive influences in the mix.

    For example, all those ’66 people are going to have a mirror (hemicycle+phase return) of their natal Saturn-Uranus opposition. We all have to ride that bus with them, but we may not choose to share it on the most intimate personal levels.

  5. Well I agree in not spending one minute more than you have to with people who make you miserable. If I have to work with them (and I have to), I just remind myself when I walk out the door, they do not exist anymore. And maybe those are the people we learn “something” from, because we are forced to deal with them.

    But in my personal life, I am not capable of spending time with people who irritate me – I am just not an “appeaser” I suppose.

  6. Wouldn’t it be awesome if we had lights above our heads flashing our astrology to each other? Ha Ha.

    Mine would also say looking for sun in capricorn, mars in taurus, mercury in aqua, venus in scorpio and moon in leo for short-term fling!

  7. hah. one reason i avoid my age group (and tend to gravitate to people on either side of it anyway) is my saturn t square. i figure i already learned enough from them and now have to work on unlearning some of those lessons and actually maybe grow myself some decent self confidence.

    i don’t see any reason why not to take that into consideration…

  8. Very true. My venus-uranus aspects attracts me to the wrong types of people, but after reading up on what it meant, I managed to make myself snap out of it. Or at least, enough in order to know to stay the hell away, even if I continue to be. There are plenty of interesting people out there with great ideas who aren’t nuts, and my self-worth has increased a lot the past few years for me not to need their validation.

  9. Wow, this is awesome advice. I love when she says stuff the others wouldn’t say 🙂

    It makes me wonder about me a bit because I am very insistent (mentally) on only wanting to date someone around my age by within a year…which of course means that their Saturn issues set off mine. Perverse, no?

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