When beginners start learning synastry, there’s a tendency to jump straight in and focus on Venus and Mars, and maybe even the Descendant. Which makes sense, right? Of course you want to be attracted to your partner. You want to be pulled toward them, for them to turn your head every time. But for real, lasting love, you need more. You want your partner to feel like home.
For this, we need to look to the Moon and the nadir, or IC. The Moon represents our emotional core, what makes us feel satisfied and safe. And the IC, which opposes the Midheaven, is our most private point. It represents who we are in our most sacred recesses, those soft vulnerable places that are never exposed to the harsh light of day.
Putting those together, you have what makes up our concept of home. A place where you can be totally safe and feel free to be exactly who you are. A place where you are valued for what you already are, and a place that provides a respite from the world. And in love, that is a beautiful thing.
I will cop to be biased here. In my personal life, I am notorious for dating people’s Moons. As a matter of fact, every single man I have dated with any degree of seriousness has had his Moon almost exactly conjunct my IC. But I am also notorious for having exceptionally long-lasting, deeply committed relationships. And I think this is no coincidence.
When your partner is your comfort, your soft place to fall, it creates a deep, untouchable bond. Very few things on this earth can come between a person and their home. When you have that unshakable sense of trust and safety, there is value there that cannot be easily discarded. Saturn isn’t the only glue in town.
So the next time you want to see what kind of long-term potential you are your prospective partner have, take a look at the Moon and the IC. If you see connections there, breathe a sigh of relief. You’re home.
Suppose a person has Uranus conjunct the nadir? (other than the fact that I’ve moved umpteen times in my life…and no, not military)
I would like to recommend Midara’s Relationship Review if anyone is wanting to get to the heart of any relationship. You will get the clarity needed (why? and how?) to approach the relationship in the most mutually beneficial way. Sometimes an outsider’s view is helpful and Midara’s perspective is deep and keen. Highly recommend?
Jennifer, thank you so much! I’m so glad I could help. <3
Do you believe that the Nadir or IC is where the Soul resides?
Wow, that is deep? LMAO! 🙂
What about IC trine Moon?
I have chiron right on the nadir.
Midara, I am just like you! Without fail: if the men have their moon in late sag/early cap it’s a) going to trine my late Leo/early Virgo stellium which includes sun and Venus, and b) it will be conjunct my IC.
I ALWAYS discover this when the connection and attraction already has been made, it blows my mind every time! And until the guy I’m seeing now, I had never had feelings for anyone but men with sag moons – but then came serious cap moon man, just as Saturn was ingressing my 4th house, lol. Talk about growing up I guess??
I am living with a roommate who has an Aquarius moon as part of stellium which works terribly with my water earth parts of the chart. He has Venus/Uranus/Neptune in Capricorn (hitting my Venus and mars 🙁 ). Even if he’s a Pisces. I try to avoid him and keep the peace when he insults me but he always wants to hang out and is entering my room sometimes. He’s deluded and thinks he likes me as a person, then after talking for 10 min remembers he doesn’t. He also wants to share all the food and leave the cutlery a mess. I’m trying to get along by avoiding him, giving him his independence, and asserting my boundaries (just once) but occasionally sharing food. I’m desperate for a place. Any tips?
I’m usually very careful with someone’s moon. I prefer water, earth , or max a Leo or Gemini moon. But the relationships I’ve had that worked were people with Gemini moons. According to different house systems I have a different nadir. I had a pretty stable upbringing in my mind so I’d imagine I have a Taurus nadir. But I always spoke a lot at home. But that could be attributed to other factors in the chart.
I know what you mean, Midara!
My current BF have his Venus in my 4th house, and almost squat down on my Cancer NN is his sun. He is going to teach me about family stuff. Luckily he has a warm and welcoming family while my own is VERY restricted and limited in supply.
His 7th house is in Cancer, so that means his partner will be his home. Apart from that, our moons is located in the same sign, with 8 degrees apart. WE are each others home emotionally I’d say.
This person is so …what do you call it… “Familiar” to me. We are perhaps familiar to each other. The degree of synchronicity is insane sometimes, between our thoughts and feelings (also a Mercury trine in the mix TBH).
The kind of kinship we feel around each other is amazing. I have never had a relationship like that before. When you add a life of hardship and the maturity that comes from it (Saturn-contacts on Venus for example) for two grown-up, adult persons, I think we have a really good omen for success here. He practically moved in with me after only 1 month of dating…
I have never considered buying a home with someone, but his moon falls in my 8th house. Maybe that is about to chance?
I have had some beautiful disasters in my life in regards to synastry and partnerships, but things seems to be going in the right direction at long last… I thank the Universe every day for him to come into my life, that’s for sure <3
My new partner has his Venus on the MC conjunct my IC!
I’m a little confused as I’m still just getting comfortable reading natal charts. In synastry my husbands mars is in my 4th. In composite our IC is in Cancer with Jupiter conjunct it. Is this similar?
Not sure about this one for me as my Leo moon conjuncts my IC.
And part of a T square. Ouch
So true. My moon is around his IC, and his moon is on my MC.
My partners ic is conjunct my Venus in his 4th house. My 5th. My north node is on his sun. Sometimes I feel like I love him more. Does it matter whose ic it is or whose venue it is?
The chart angles carry and hold the whole Self. Marry the Midheaven to the IC – and all relating becomes less problematic.
The fellow I like has his moon in my 4th, so that’s interesting…
My husband and I have Sun/Nadar both ways. My favorite thing is coming home after a stressful day and melting into his arms. It’s like everything..all the tension from the releases. He feels the same… I know because sometimes when he comes home stressed, he hugs me tightly and breathes a long sigh of relief. Sometimes we stay hugging for 1,2,3 whole minutes. We are definitely the soft place to land for each other. This is part of the good in our synastry….of course there are challenges too. But what’s also cool about our synastry and something else that makes us feel that total comfort with each other is our Suns are also sort of mutually exhanged, in that his Scorpio Sun falls in H12(Pisces domain) and my Pisces Sun falls in H8(Scorpio’s domain).
I have natal moon and south node on the Nadir.
My exhusband had his Saturn on my Nadir.
My current bf has Progressed Juno/sun conjunct my Nadir