Thanks everyone for your good wishes. We appreciate it! We’re both happy as hell and I’ll tell you more as soon as we’re settled down.
I know most would be curious as to why I am writing on my blog the day after I got married and it’s simple. The soldier has to leave tomorrow (or Monday it we are extra lucky) and he has some things to do that require complete attention before he goes so he’s doing that and I am doing this and he’s done we’ll go back to hibernating until he has to leave.
I feel unfit (too distracted) to work on consultations or one of the charts for the class, so I am postponing that work until he is gone but I can write blogs (by the thousands) or story tell pretty easily so here I am.
Last week I wrote Always The Bridesmaid, Never The Bride.. etc. We’ve been talking about the Venus Pluto (and Saturn) aspect as well (Love Karma). There is also a Venus Pluto thread on the boards and I something new that ties all this together… along with my wedding for that matter.
It is my strong experience lovers come back from the dead when Venus aspects Pluto, this never fails in my case. Many of you know that before the soldier and I got together a few years ago I was with a man I called, The AMF. He was a Scorpio with Mercury and Scorpio and Venus conjunct Saturn in Scorpio. I split his Scorpio like that because it’s split in his chart that way… Sun Mercury in the 9th, Venus Saturn in the 8th.
With a configuration that you might consider him a high-minded Scorp with dark, burdensome love life and it would not that far off. In whatever case, he was blunt (9th house) and insightful (Scorpio) and I spent 3 years with him before he broke up with me and the soldier and I came together. 2 years later (a year ago) his next (ex)girlfriend contacted me.
He had broken up with her and she was devastated, asking for help and/or insight. It put me in a hell of a position.
I am a very loyal person, even if you happen to be my ex-boyfriend or perhaps especially because you are my ex-boyfriend but I am also a woman who helps women so I felt I had to do something. I had to answer her at least and when I answered her I was going to have to say something so this is what I did.
I tried to help her while not betraying him and felt I did “okay” on that front although it was murderous for me. There were just a couple or 3 emails exchanges and I was very relieved when I was able to wrap this up. If you wonder how this might be possible…. well if you are a woman who has ever been left by a stellium in Scorpio then you know how bad this feels and one of her concerns was that he had gone back to be with me which is why I really had to write her.
Think about it. She’s up all night thinking her boyfriend went back to his ex… I’d have had to be some kind of bitch not to let her off that hook so I did. I told I was not with him, would not be with him… and that I was with a man I loved deeply so she should have no concerns… ::sighs::
So now it’s a year later and I heard from her again. She said she was going through old emails to delete and she came across mine.
She wrote me to tell me she was doing well and to thank me for writing her a year ago. She said it helped pull her through a very dark time and she was now with a man she loved… he was very solid and she was happy. I wrote her back to tell her I’d just married and this is when it hit me…
As I said, the AMF was extremely smart and also very candid. We talked extensively of 8th house type things, psych and patterns and such and he told me once that every time he had a significant relationship with a woman, the man AFTER him turned out to be the one they were truly matched with. It was stunning statement seeing as he had two marriages, one for 16 years, another for 7 but now I think he was right.
He theorized that he excavated various things from a woman’s psyche that were precursor to her being able to form a lasting bond with an appropriate partner. He wondered aloud if this were not his purpose and he was not exactly complaining.
“No need for you to worry about us breaking up,” he said. “If I break up with you, the next man you meet will be the on you want to spend your life with…”
I could not tell you for sure if this bothered him or not and if it did, to what degree. He was an Aquarius Moon and rising so quite freedom-loving and detached in spite of this clear expression of his 8th house Venus/Saturn. I know he didn’t crave the situation but he did cop to the fact that it was typically HIM doing the breaking up so he really had nothing to say about it and here is the point I want to make:
You read in (good) astrology books about Scorpio energy empowering and/or transforming others but no one gives you an example how this works so I just filled this void, huh?
Bravo!!!
Hmmm, I’ve wondered about this quite a lot over the years. Some people just seem to be catalysts – whoever comes into contact with them gets changed forever, while they themselves remain the same.
opal – that’s a good catch. He was Moon, ascendent in Aquarius, all the scorp, Pluto in Leo – that is a lot of FIXED energy!
And jennyg – thank you. I have the intention to post at least one picture but I will probably be slow.
D’you know, I hadn’t thought of it in those terms but it makes total sense. Must look at some charts!
Elsa, you are too damn smart.
congratulations…i guess nothing keeps mercury-mars from storytelling. hope you have a few moments to bask in happiness before he leaves!
appealing mother fucker
I know this well, most of my former boyfriends got married with their next girlfriend, pretty soon after I broke up with them (Venus-Uranus) and all of them married good friends of mine – yeah!
I thought it was Amazing MotherFucker?
Connie, that’s just so WTF? Were/are you okay with that? Still in touch with those friends and exes?
Reminds me of the one couple in “The Runaway Bride,” Joan Cusack’s character and her husband, who were best friend and former flame to the title character. Haven’t seen the movie, though, so I can’t tell you anything else about it. I just caught that part while flipping channels. 😉
I thought it was Artistic Mother Fucker?
SaDiablo, to be honest it was not fun, I felt I was paying each of my breakups with a friend… and I’m not in touch with any of them anymore. Later in life I found out that I could change this pattern – now I don’t break up anymore and I keep me friends. It’s working well so far. 🙂
Well, I’ve got that very precise Venuys/Uranus conjunct in Scorpio and 3rd house. I’ve only had a couple of significant relationships, and haven’t been in ANY contact what so ever with the latest one prior to the current one, so I can’t tell whether this is working for me always.
But with my first real boyfriend it was pretty much this way: He was seeing the woman he ended up marrying within weeks after we split up (and insists there really wasn’t anything going on while he still was with me), went living with her in about 6 months, bought a house in 1 year, and finally married her. The thing is, hearing him describe his wife – older and with a better formal education he has – this woman probably wouldn’t even have been interested in him hadn’t he been exposed to certain things through me.
Now, I’m in a relationship which frustrates me, because as much as we’ve been talking about certain issues my partner is having, I can’t see any developement there. They just come up every 3 months or so, when my patience runs out, but nothing happens. Must be the Saturn (his) opposition to Moon (mine) in synastry (which is a bit harsh, but all over there).
von, it is not my perspective, it is his. I just think I’m seeing it proven true.
And The AMF does stand for The Appealing Motherfucker.
i have sun in scorpio and moon in aquarius. the energy is very, very fixed. maybe there’s some kind of metaphor there for “fixing” things. i hope so …
i think i know what you’re describing about your old friend. truthfully, it’s not easy to admit i’m aware of something like this. it’s the type of thing which would generally get tossed in my SCORPIO SECRETS folder. but as long as we’re sharing: i feel that the reaper brings the healing, at least that’s what i keep telling myself. there’s plenty of healing for everyone, with the understated truth that healing often hurts like hell.
it’s bizarre but even with these callous actions, i’m still thought of as a very spiritually healing person. and i do carry this idea that i’m intended to fix things which have fallen into disrepair.
Candela, when I read you post it came to my mind… his Saturn on your Moon may be a good aspect to emotionally detach from his issues.
I know he didn’t crave the situation but he did cop to the fact that it was typically HIM doing the breaking up so he really had nothing to say about it
So he couldn’t hack the intimacy thing, basically, what with the Aquarian moon and Saturn-Venus? Or he picked the Aquarian types to replicate the square?
You read in (good) astrology books about Scorpio energy empowering and/or transforming others but no one gives you an example how this works so I just filled this void, huh?
By doing it to others, he avoided doing it to himself. Sounds sucky. Well, gee, I hope I’m not doing that.
max
[‘Making lemons out of lemonade.’]
max, his Aquarius Moon was in the 12th so he had a touch of “victim” in him but by and large he owned his energy.
it is this man
https://elsaelsa.com/astrology/2012/06/11/love-synastry-relationship/
While we got along really well for a good amount of time, he did have a (very conscious) script that said all relationships end in misery and pain.
He also was super-detached in between totally merging. This suited my 8th house and my 7th house Uranus so there you go.
But in the end he did have to kill it… it was like it was written from the day we met.
I have no regrets re: this relationship. not one.
While we got along really well for a good amount of time, he did have a (very conscious) script that said all relationships end in misery and pain.
Right. Ouch. Speaking as Venus/Libra oppo Saturn (within one degree). It seems almost deliberate, and while I could see be stuck in it unconsciously (no matter how you try and root those things out), just embracing it so you can go with it (I guess) seems fairly awful. (As in deliberately ending it.)
He also was super-detached in between totally merging. This suited my 8th house and my 7th house Uranus so there you go.
It seems almost like we should go all Ebertin and say the aspects dominate here (the square and the conjunction to Saturn) and decide the misery and pain parts and the Scorpio part just fixes people ‘accidently’.
I have no regrets re: this relationship. not one.
Oh, no, I wasn’t thinking like that.
max
[‘Or maybe it would just boils down to, ‘Well, now I know what I don’t want.’]
max :::waves:::…you feel like joining the boards? we need some dudes in the mix.:)
Makes a lot of sense to me Elsa… And I’d always wondered why/how you guys split up! It didn’t seem that you would’ve ended things with him without something really lousy happening. I can see how you wouldn’t have any regrets… He was good for you for a while, but I’m glad you found your Soldier again. 🙂
It’s interesting, I had a “catalytic” experience with a Taurus just before meeting my husband. He told me that his exes tended to marry the men they got with right after him, and whined about being a good luck charm for others while having lousy luck himself. The difference between him and the AMF though, is that this guy sucks the life and energy out of women, and then pushing them away passive-aggressively b/c he lacks the balls to dump them. I found it to be a real eye-opening experience, and I left him knowing exactly what I did and didn’t want in a relationship, and feeling completely unwilling to waste any more time settling for less. 😀
(((Conny))) That situation just sucks. I’m glad you’ve resolved it.
MAX!!!! *big over-enhusiatastic bearhug on Scorpion* Glad to see you’ve popped in for a bit! I agree, you should join the boards. We need a rooster in the henhouse.
[Pithy parting shots are in short supply, too. 😉 ]
max :::waves:::…you feel like joining the boards? we need some dudes in the mix.:)
Hey, you! Hrmm. Are those thing supposed to be a skive of vretched hum and willany? No… hive… skum… villainy… it’s teen queen Villainy Spears and her new album, I Know I Am But What Are You? Nice or Something?…. Anyways, I recall hearing it involved a lot of
guysladies standing around in wookie suits. Which I guess would be a negative brazilian.{whispers} Sound scary. Do they take US dollars?
MAX!!!! *big over-enhusiatastic bearhug on Scorpion* Glad to see you’ve popped in for a bit!
Huggles! Except watch out. Apparently I caught something at the post office, which has rendered me goofy. I like the bear hugs though!
I agree, you should join the boards. We need a rooster in the henhouse.
Well, that sounds bad. Combine that with the wookie suits and it sounds… wooly. But you only live once, said the man in the closed casket! So… um, ok. I’m not not going to roasted alive and consumed by something with five eyeballs on stalks or anything, right? Probably not, anyways?
[Pithy parting shots are in short supply, too.]
max
[‘I was pithy once, but then I rambled off. Sad, really.’]
thank you for this post.