I went to therapy back in the very early 90’s; weekly, for three years. I really got into this process. For me, it was do or die and I do have my 8th house. I recall one of my therapists telling me to slow down. It would have been good advice, if not for my particular nature. I mean, the last thing I wanted to do was prolong this! So I really worked on it. I immersed myself and in the end, the effort made everything that happened next, possible.
I don’t talk about this very often, simply because it’s not interesting. I do think about it, though, because I use the skills I learned at that time, to help clients. I’m talking about dealing with PTSD or CPTSD. I’ve very good at it, having learned well, in the first place. I then stacked forty years of practice on top of that! At this point, I’m a pro! But there are other things I know a lot about, people don’t realize.
In the course of my therapy, I met other traumatized people, including people hurt worse and even much worse than I was. This would be in groups and what not. My background is pretty severe. If you’re in a situation like this, a person like me will tend to gravitate toward others on the far(ish) side of the spectrum. There was one gal I became good friends with. Her experiences were off the chain… considered unbelievable by some or even by many. I knew she wasn’t lying.
This gal was a lesbian. I tend to get along with lesbians; my sister was able to point out why: “They don’t kowtow to men!” She was also a vegan which was more exotic then, than it is now.
On that note, I brought, my grandfather, Henry, to the table. He was a vegan in the 1950’s. My son and his girlfriend are now vegans and probably think I think it’s cutting edge from my perspective… best recalibrate that assumption, but anyway, I believed her, for sure. Add in, Henry, and my extensive knowledge about health food; you can see how we had this affinity.
I believed her because I can generally tell when someone is being honest, but also, my father was psycho enough, I knew very well what people are capable of. He also had contact with various groups over the years. I’ve written about this, but not in the last twenty years. Anyway, I believed her. And because of this, when people have told me similar stories over the years, I’ve been able to align with them.
This gal did me a lot of good, then, and even more good, now. I’m pretty sure I helped her as well, if for no other reason, then she could talk. Oh, hell yeah and you know me. I had questions! I wanted her to recall things, in minute detail. She wanted to expel things in the same fashion. How else can she be rid of the shame?
I won’t go into details because it would not add anything to the post… which I intend to be about the time – then and now. Then, she was a lone voice. Now this stuff is going mainstream… which is good, in my opinion.
I hope this gal is alive to see this. To see people around the world, come to understand, she didn’t make it up. Now if they can go beyond merely “knowing” to actually taking action, that would be great!
This is the shadow side (Pluto) of Aquarius, by the way. I’ve written about that before, though I would not have spelled it out. I’m glad I’ve lived to see this day.
The Sean Combs stuff coming out makes Epstein look like child’s play. If only people knew these groups are everywhere. Sorry, I should say a lot of people know these groups are everywhere because they have personally crossed paths with them. They just have absolutely no one to tell… until now. I’m generally all for it. it makes me wonder too… if all the “meanness” building up over these years is just people getting fed up with the lies and their part in it. The dissonance makes people edgy, whether they know it or not.
This makes perfect sense. You’re on thin ice; take it out on others.
Can’t speak of others but I’d find it very interesting and helpful to read if you ever feel like sharing more about that time and therapy, and lessons, what you learned…
Can you be more specific? I have pretty tremendous recall, of everything. You can also search the site or click tags. This site is vast.
I am curious in which ways you find Pluto is unveiling the systematic abuse after going into Aquarius. Is there a post I have overlooked that sets the stage of it, or?
I am coming out from a very long 12th house Pluto transit, and my mind is rather humbled and tumbled after that.
(Ok, it doesn’t help that right now I am on meds because of a tooth surgery yesterday LOL).
So, this is just my curiosity.
I have been deep into the mud if these themes for the past 15 years myself, but – I think you mean something along that these things make headlines now. Or am I wrong? I think I have noticed these stories nonstop over the years. But perhaps I could be wrong, or just too Scorpionic for that matter 😉
Pluto in Aquarius will expose the shadow side of social groups / organizations. I’m talking about, George Carlin’s remark, “It’s a big club and you ain’t in it.”
Thanks Elsa. I wanted to be sure I got it right.
I have been in therapy for 8 years now. I cannot thank my therapist enough for the amazing healing and growth she has helped me find for myself over this time. I’m a very different person now than I was in 2016 – better and more healed, calmer and more in control of myself and my life. I spend most mornings reading, journaling and/or meditating. It’s my best time when my mind is open to it and not clouded by daily responsibilities.
I remember sitting in my bed one morning reading a new book someone recommended on CPTSD, by Pete Walker. I wasn’t familiar with his work or the topic at the time. I sat there with this book open in my lap and I sobbed. His words, his explanations of how CPTSD is created in an individual, read like they came straight out of my life. I had never read such a clear explanation of how my childhood had traumatized me. Suddenly I wasn’t alone in the horror and its consequences. I now had a name for it and a clearer understanding of what it meant for me and my life. It also helped me to very clearly be able to label the abuse for what it was and not think of it in terms of how society sees it. I was abused – religiously, mentally, verbally, emotionally and physically – for the first 22 years of my life. Period. So much made sense after that and in that way I was able to heal so much more.
Shining a spotlight on abuse and trauma helps those of us who never had a name for it to heal. People are waking up to it everywhere – their experiences are finally being described accurately and the consequences and impacts in our lives can now be clearly seen so that healing can begin or deepen.
I am so sorry on your behalf, Daisy. It’s abominable that no official psychiatric assessment system has yet incorporated the CPTSD in the diagnostic criterias.
Hopefully this will change in the next few years.
I have had several sources of CPTSD in my childhood too. It’s an excruciating pain to realise, but oh so healing. Warm thoughts to your journey ❤️
Thank you Anette – and to you as well. May we all find the ‘medicine’ that we need to heal!
I can only agree – Luckily I found mine. It seems you did too 🤗
@elsa – this post and the post on Mass Delusion/Clarity go somewhat hand in hand for me. I see parallels here.
Mass delusion = thinking that a ‘strict’ or ‘tough’ childhood is a good thing and will help people become better adults.
Mass clarity = nope, that’s actually abuse. You were abused and now you’re traumatized and that’s why you act/think/believe/feel the way you do.
“people realizing there’s no left or right tonight”
https://twitter.com/jack/status/1785526580761997421
So pluto is not a problem solver, but problem detector and revealer? After transit you’re not done, not even close, but hopefully you managed to see and identify particular issue revealed by particular pluto transit? does that make sense?
It makes sense; we see the underside of an issue(s) but it does not mean it doesn’t solve it. Our lifespan is too short to say that.
I was on the front line for AIDS, which came to light when Pluto went into Scorpio. Pluto is squaring that point and people are still dying from AIDS. Will they be dying of AIDS at the opposition? We don’t know. I mean, it’s got to be exposed, if it’s to be healed. So in that way, Pluto is involved in healing.