I don’t bother counting how many assaults I’ve suffered. I can say this – I have a lot of experience with it. And if you want your power back, I can tell you a neat trick ’round how this can be done. It’s simple, but eludes most people. I don’t know why.
All you have to do is resolve the thing. I don’t care you do it. It doesn’t matter if you go to therapy. It doesn’t matter if you figure how you’re going to transcend a situation or some kind of hurt. And I am talking about HURT, okay? Not minor boo-boos. I am talking about horrible loss and I am talking, backed up by my own experience.
Now you can talk to a priest, an astrologer, a therapist, a friend – it really doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you resolve the thing, inside yourself, for yourself. Because people who hurt other people, often go back to the scene of the crime, don’t they? They want to revisit. They want to smell your blood, some more. Survey the damage.
But what if there is no blood to smell?
If you can resolve your issue or your pain or whatever it is, you’ll enter and exist on a new plane. And once you do, it’s very hard for this stuff to reach you and impact you in a negative way.
Why? Because it’s resolved! You did the work – it’s done.
I say this: Quit running. Face the situation.
Have you ever truly resolved a painful loss?
so wise, so true! thank you!
Very very good advice!! Though its tough, but to be a winner, we have to do it. No other choice.
I think of it as winning too sona. Winning is an attitude.
And notice I said “resolved” not “recovered”. Major distinction there.
Interesting discernment. I understand the distinction: “there is no more blood to sniff.” Vultures go away at this point. I am compost and I feed my future.
Wow. This hits home for me big time right now. Just been suffering an attack by a stalker that has been stalking me for quite some time (at least since 2014.) I did ask a few months back for me to find out the truth and I got what I wished for (that saying is true- be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.)
I’ve never known such insidious covert attacking in my life since he came forward and revealed himself. He suckered his way in and slowly tried to damage my self esteem- all in just a single month. I finally put my foot down today and kicked him out of my life. Thank God we only just texted and talked on the phone. I knew in my heart since day one that he wasn’t any sort of friend. Sometimes my Moon/Jupiter trine makes me too nice and naive and I allow others to get one up over on me. Until I finally explode and then watch out.
I was having nightmares that this guy was going to really physically harm me. Now that I know he is a real coward, I’m not scared at all.
I’m still upset about the entire thing but more like annoyed because I see it for what it was= a sad 43 year old man who is scared of women so he has to try to terrorize them mentally and emotionally so he can gain a sense of false empowerment.
Pathetic.
Good meat on the plate today. This is perfect.
Delaying the task is a cause of some bodily malfunction which is some kind of heavenly blessing giving time to be connecting with yourself.
This is a big deal for me, I have really been working on this one.
“If you can resolve your issue or your pain or whatever it is, you’ll enter and exist on a new plane. And once you do, it’s very hard for this stuff to reach you and impact you in a negative way.”
I keep being told this statement over and over, through a variety of people and methods – verbal, reading,… I think I need to hear this message.
Sprngrdn
That’s very smart, Elsa. Thank you.
Yes! I did exactly what you said. I’m at peace with a lot of things that have happened to me in my life.
Since my progressed planets have moved into the 8th house one by one usually some traumatic event as happened each time. (like seeing my ex having sex with another women, being raped, having to call the police on a roommate to only find out that he was on probation for physical abuse). My Prog Mercury (ruler of my chart will be progressing into my 8th in 2018 with it squaring my natal Pluto, conjunct Tr Pluto- yes Tr Pluto will be going into my 8th too), with Prog MC conjunct Pluto, AND at this time I’ll have Progressed Moon conj Pluto in the 5th. I’m *ucking scared… too much Pluto/8th house all together.
I have been in therapy since 2007 since this all started and nothing is being resolved… it’s literally killing me.
Amen from one tough cookie to another
Honestly, I’m not t peace with it. I know he will continue to do what he’s done for years. Hell, he just followed me again on a chat site I frequent. But, I usually use my intelligence to get him to back off.
Earlier, a precious thing occurred. I found two gold coins in my car and they weren’t there before. Someone or something put them there. That’s a sign of angels so I know I’m on the right path. I have pictures of the mysterious coins for proof.
Ooh. Deep deep stuff, Elsa. I like it…. In fact, I think a lot of us needed this question to be posed in our direction. Yeah…. I so want to be done. I do. And I think it’s possible… It just takes some solid Saturn, I guess: dedication, discipline and time.
I’m curious. What is “recovered” to you vs. “resolved”? Just want to hear the difference from your (& anyone’s) perspective.
I am also interested in this – recovered vs resolved. In my mind, recovered means any physical damage is healed, while resolved means the psychological issues are put to rest. I am not there, but I would like to be.
Recovery vs Resolution, Post Trauma
Thank you so much for linking back to this post. It’s just what I needed today.
Recovered for me is it doesn’t hurt any more, I’m over the shock of it and have buried the hurt.
Resolved for me is I have freed myself from what it was in me (or past lives, ancestors – whatever) that attracted it.
Very intersting post, and thank you for the added explanation of recovery vs resolution.
In spite of what looks like a “simple” method to overcome trauma, I think it takes a very elevated mind.
“Simple”, but not easy. (But… you never said it was esay!)
It’s precious to get advice from someone who’s really been there.
Right. I don’t think it’s easy, but I do think it’s possible. And I don’t think it’s common to realize this. I say that because of how I put this together. Maybe I’ll outline that next.
When I say “simple”, I mean, there are not a lot of complex steps…you don’t have to send a psychic, one thousand dollars and such. 🙂
Separate but related:
https://elsaelsa.com/astrology/looking-beyond-overcoming-an-abusive-childhood/
A few days ago I was reading the old post with you and the Droid ambushed the bully and his mom Italian style and that put a smile on my face. When I was 14, we moved out of the city schools and into the suburbs and I joined a church youth group there we even took a field trip to you with love you saved a lot of car wash money for that anyways I like a Sagittarius guy in my church youth group he was a senior I was freshman about to started his school. My mother had a rule no going in car still 16 in her generation everybody got knocked up in them because they were huge cars in my generation we had everybody’s hand me down 80 Civic and other small cars and working parents so people wanted to fornicate didn’t have to crunch themselves into a Dodge Daytona black I’m not discussing. Anyway the Hungarian Sagittarius Rock she works for the CIA now was kind the music group we stopped and got Dairy Queen we stopped at a playground the moon was out I sat on his lap on the swing and I kissed him . The following week there was a boy who was about six foot five and a half a grade above me kid beady eyes in this clear braces that he didn’t trust I’m kind of mouth like you when you smiled it was just square and I felt sorry for him he was friends with my friend Joe in deciding to convert to Catholicism and he offered to walk me home by sagatarious was at a golf tournament and he attacked me sexually an exacto knife broke my nose it was pretty brutal I lied to my parents said some of the girls from the city tells me that I have been in fights with before cuz I was still 14 year old girl and I thought even though the sky was an animal if I told him the truth I never so glad to see you again like a boy that I like . What made me think of you and your son Elsa with that I was seeing a therapist ok or couple years later and I was very skinny then but I was wearing my dads jeans / a pair of my jeans over like a lumberjack shirt / sweatshirt and I was on 17th so the only way I could have like an actual shapely muscular body but address to Columbia jack and my therapist said when was you raved. Were you raped and she said she needed to call my mother and tell her about this well the boy worked at the movie theatre and he was sleeping outside the Loews Theater on the way back from the shrink and my mom my Sagittarian mom with her leave her moon and her Pisces rising which is usually pretty peaceful there she has a sharp tongue she cooked hamburger right out of his hand and beat him and beat him and said lucky you didn’t go all the way one day you’re going to have daughters and I pray to God nothing like this ever happens to them and two years ago I went to a wedding he was the best man had two beautiful little girls but he hated women while you thought I was beating on me you saying you b****** you tease your trip I hate my mother my mother made my dad go away and I’ve been in the door psychological assault have been in school yard scraps I even got myself in the middle of a bar fight when I was bartending because a guy took a swing at his girlfriend and I tried to break it up my dad was a prize fighter so I can find to try to get between them and I knocked him down and she cracked my tooth and said boyfriend even know he had blood eternos and smashed it in pretty good . Somebody put your hands on me this past year they were messed up on them smoking meth broke into my house was a former business partner and. Tennant and I’m just watching him throw his life away I was a Scorpio with Gemini moon and Aquarius rising is a Gemini with Scorpio Moon in Libra rising I’m just watching him run around and it was the world’s sweetest moment in my life I don’t like altercations I got my little Mars retrograde right on the 10th between Gemini and cancer someone to discuss its all good Brfood it cuss and wear glasses .enough
I have used something called EFT or emotional freedom technique. It is a pinpointing relaxation technique where a person targets specific hurts and neutralizes the negative emotions. It doesn’t erase the experience but helps a person transcend it, keeping the valuable lessons while easing the pain. Forgetting isn’t the best thing. It’s better to keep the lessons from a horrible event but let go of the pain. When tapping on a certain event, it is funny how other, past events pop up and I realize that the hurt goes much deeper than the recent incidents. Some things hurt a lot because we’re already harmed by something similar from our forgotten past. It all ties together.
Thank you for reposting this!
It helps to be reminded that horrible things can be transformed.
For those with recent hurts, but also for those where pain/unease/feelings of helplessness linger.
Nothing like clarity to clean wounds and repair.
Coincides well with all the Pluto Direct, Aries FM energies.
My son physically assaulted me several days ago. He is in jail, I am recovering from my injuries. The emotional healing will take longer, for sure.
Peace, friends.
So very sorry, ChironRising. I hope you have support.
Gratefully, I do. Thank you so much, libra rising. XO
Elsa, This is such good advice! By resolving your issue, you change your whole vibrational level, so someone on a lower vibrational plane cannot reach you. We keep meeting the same challenges, whether in the form of person or situation, until we learn the lesson we’re meant to learn.
Absolutely. Evolve, shed, evolve, shed. Always be striving toward your highest self & the betterment of this world. Release those who are leaving, walk away from hollow or non-resonating people. Accept when something has ended. Be grateful for whatever purpose it served. Never gaze back. Know that something more in alignment with your path is on the horizon. Trust.
Thank you for another thought provoking post Elsa. In 2010, I was facing some brutal stuff. Now I would have to say I have resolved it in my own mind, closed those doors & trying very hard to push against the S, H, one T, uphill to recreate a better life for me. My ex-husband cannot ever revisit the ‘crime’ scene because he is shut out for good!
Interesting thing happened on 15 Sept, 2017 when my youngest made contact. He was angry & abusive which was what I expected, but the fact he was hung up on multiple times when he kept on swearing abuse, he kept ringing back & that told me that he was desperate for contact even if it involved shouting from his sibling. I left them to battle it out then spoke to those two here quietly & firmly about what I saw & was able to interpret.
I took time to write my youngest a letter that places the ball firmly in his court, that I allowed both his siblings to have input into (but told them very clearly that it was my letter, not theirs) then posted it. What happens from this point on is entirely up to him. He will have no misunderstanding of where I stand. Should he allow his father or that side of the family to view it, they will discover, the ‘crime’ scene cupboard is empty!
“Because people who hurt other people, often go back to the scene of the crime, don’t they? They want to revisit. They want to smell your blood, some more. Survey the damage.”
Yes, yes, yes. I should print this one and have it as a reminder. So VERY true. Thank you Elsa.
I have had a very recent experience of this, by an 8th House woman, no less. Venus in Scorpio, among others. Emotional assault. I think she just wanted to hurt me, so that she could make her lasting impact, show me who’s the boss in this one, who’s in charge. A power game to her, not a love affair. Control and hurt through seduction. This is Pluto, folks, in all his glory.
Currently recovering and working towards resolution.
I am sorry you are hurting, Don. Please do not give her that kind of power. You are in control of your thoughts & emotions. Her pathology is about her; it is NOT your reality. When we truly know, accept & love ourselves for who we are, no one can harm us. Goddess protect you & your precious heart.
Thank you so much for your kind words, ChironRising… You are very much right in your previous post, this FM, together with Pluto direct, shed a lot of light on these Plutonian situations and people, so that we can see who they are for good… I am deeply sorry you had to go through a lot lately yourself, but hope that you will do your best to protect your body, spirit and soul from now on.. No one, not even your son, has any right to do you harm… God bless you and protect you.. all the best..
I don’t know how I missed this post, but the timing is auspicious with this Chiron-aspected FM. Lots of healing energies to harness, folks.
I appreciate you, Don. Thank you so much for the above sentiments. Hope life is treating you well.
Yes, I did. And every word you write here about this is very true! I have learned and exprienced the same. I hope that everyone who read this realize that this is a very valuable advise. A gift from Elsa on this blog.
There has passed almost a year since I wrote this. I still think
the same. It reminds me of my thearpeut. She gave me valuable advice for the rest of my life. This was 30 years ago. She was a great woman. A light.
Thank you Elsa, so much.
The only real solution to a bully is to remove yourself. They want a reaction more than anything else. They want to think they are winning some fight they created in their head that proves they are victorious over you. But what if you don’t play, right? They take stab and, instead of revenge, you pick up and leave. Every time they come after you, you’re moving on to some place else. They have to keep chasing you and not getting a response from their abuse. Eventually they get bored and leave to harass someone else. Ultimate they think it’s fun. It’s a big game to these people…to think they gut you, ya know? They can’t stand being ignored and demoted to the past as nothing.
So true! I have been using this technique of removing myself for a couple of years, and the bully (mother in-law) can’t take it! She keeps trying to reel me in with the same old tactics and I refuse and move on. She is so pist off that she can no longer exert some control over me… it’s kind of funny now, because I can literally predict her next move.
I agree. Leaving/getting away from the bully is the only good move you can make. Persecuting them? Trying to fight back? Any of it, nothing works. They will continue to thrive and make evil and there’s nothing you can do to stop it other than take you as a toy away.
Good on you, Laughing Goat. Isn’t it marvelous when we finally realize how easily we can shift toxic/Qi vampire/drama bullsh*t, power dynamics? You really DO have the last laugh. Blessings.
Thinking about this today.
Thanks for the reminder.
Thinking about this in terms of 2020-2022. Definitely led to feelings of disempowerment which I’m only just starting to come out of. Can we consider assault in terms of a collective phenomena?
Absolutely! And you have a lot of company with this. I hope this posts helps you get past it. Maybe take the time to list what all happened (from your perspective), list what you lost. Grieve and let go, really totally, let it go.
I’ve been thinking about it, but I’m resistant to letting go. Why? Because I want to keep my anger alive. Why? Because people are getting hit hard left right and centre (deaths) and the accountability is still nil. I agree that I don’t want my feelings about this to overally effect my quality of life, drag me down, make me useless, etc. I still want to be active and purposeful, but somehow I want to also stay present with the anger I have as it gives me clarity and may be helpful to others as we move through this aftermath. I may not have described it well, but I see that part of it at least, the anger, as a healthy response that somehow focuses my loving instincts.
I haven’t really figured out how to resolve anything. I go to therapy weekly. I’m just not sure what you resolve? Do you “forgive?” Do you stop caring? Do you just get used to the fact/idea that you were hurt? I did EFT for awhile and it would lessen things, but it never totally went away either.
Love this. So many give advice of just letting go, forgive forget… what if you’ve forgiven them in the past and end up enabling them to abuse/assault you again… or others?? I had to forgive MYSELF, for allowing toxic people to drag me continuously because I know my enabling fed their ego and no doubt harm others. I also allowed ANY feelings to surface when my body said it needed release. Anger, ugly tears etc. Without judgement or telling myself I should be over it. When I finally realized I has to honor my body and mind’s journey.. I truly began healing. Nature is a massive healer. Gardening, hiking, just stopping outdoors and using my senses, being present. So amazing. You can’t run or supress trauma or it’ll seep in and create chronic disease. Many of us had to stuff it in deep to survive for years, EMDR helps with that too.
Wow Angel, so well said!
“When I finally realized I has to honor my body and mind’s journey.. I truly began healing.”
I feel that this is entirely accurate. Thank you.
Thank you as well. I love hearing others feel this.
Hi Jennifer, i can relate to your frustration. In my experience, you resolve something when you make sense of it for yourself. It is very personal.
I think in terms of stories. Star Trek 5, a less popular Star Trek movie, deals with this subject. Spock has a powerful scene with his brother in the movie where he shows him that he has transcended his earlier pain. To me, this is what it looks like. The line he says to his brother is, “I am no longer the child you knew on Vulcan.” When you let go of your pain, it does change you.
It is true that you are the only one who can let go of it, but that puts the power in your hands.
The biggest challenge, I find, is in identifying what the pain truly is, and then, why I’m holding onto it. I like to say that we have the key to our own cage. That makes us more powerful than anything that is done to us.
I hope that helps.
Thank you Elsa, for another powerful post.