So on Mars and my bear status, it was very uncomfortable coming to terms with this side of my nature. I guess we all like to think of ourselves in positive light. I know I do. But over the years I am more and more willing to deal in reality and the more I do, the more I see how ridiculous it is not to.
Am I better off to be aware I that I can and will effectively defend myself? Or should I kid myself and others by playing powerless or endlessly kind? I think this is a profound struggle for Mars in Libra who wants to be perceived as “nice”.
Do you tend to present as “endlessly kind”?
Whether endlessly kind, or endlessly perfect (my Virgo Moon), the problem with not being real is that the repressed gets projected….and that can be really yucky!!
Um, yeah. I present myself this way. And for the most part I am, but I am highly intolerant of liars, people who break my trust (by lying to me or spilling secrets) and people who lack integrity. And as everyone knows, if a person (me) lacks tolerence (even if legit)…well, my reactions are not always ‘kind’!
I think the real issue is often about people feeling OK about standing up for themselves, being able to say No etc. I had this situation the other day where this guy had a load of people dancing to his tune, doing things they didn’t want to, because they couldn’t say no. I came along and said no, and the whole situation fell apart. I think it’s often easier for men to say no, because culturally women are supposed to be the ‘nice’ ones who ‘care’ about people and are endlessly ‘selfless’, and you can feel like a bad person for going no, I want this.
I have the opposite problem. Most of the time, people percieve me as nice and quiet AND easily swayed… which is annoying.
Because while I am somewhat… willing to bend, and eager to help…generally there is a point when I would like the other person to realize that I won’t bend any further-usually when I say no, in fact, that I will (and can) crush them with my little pinky…. (ok, figuratively) Basically, when I make up my mind, I’m very stubborn- it’s just that I so seldom make up my mind…
and even when I do…it’s about ten degrees beyond this point where I will actually get out my mars and use it on someone. That’s what’s frustrating- I never react as soon as I wish I could. If I could just let my mars out sooner- it would save me from whole hours of… wasted time, and lots of boring …people.
I really have a temper too, but I always hold it in. I guess I learned that letting it out too easily can hurt myself, and at most points where it should be used and I use it with caution… it tends to burn bridges- that person isn’t ever coming back. So now I never really act out without making a reasoned decision and cooling off first.
I’ve been thinking about taking up extreme sports as an answer to this. Maybe then I will sleep better.
Just one question… If one uses sports as an outlet (say, rock-climbing) is one likely to get injured? And what about rash decisions as an outlet (say, “oh, today I’m going to fly to XXXX.”)- is this worse? or is this constructive?
I’ve got energy.. but I have to figure out how to let it out without destroying something. Sex is not the answer. Currently, I’m holding alot in, and it’s driving me nuts.
Suggestions?
(Mars conjunct Uranus and MC in Sadg, square Sun, Mercury, Ascendant)
andro – I think one is more likely to get injured by NOT using the energy.
Andro, Elsa is spot on–that energy is not going to go away and it can manifest itself in ways that a person may never anticipate.
I am sorry you are holding so much in, that’s a painful position to be in, and the repression of what you consider to be potentially destructive energy may turn in, like Elsa noted.
I have struggled with feeling like my own energy was ‘bad’or ‘destructive’ but over the years I have found that one really needs to seek out like-minded people and the energy blossoms.
As a person with Mars in a fire sign, I think I understand where you are coming from–how do you let fire out ‘just a little bit’, not to destroy anything? (I also have MC conjunct Uranus, and this contributes to emotions of wanting to *break free!*)
We’re all taught not to play with fire, but play is what we need! Sagittarius is associated with higher learning, philosophy etc as well as the outdoors…
And I highly recommend flying off to places spontaneously!! Especially for person with a lot of Sag! Good for you for articulating your feelings. There are a million ways to work with your energy…explore every one of them if need be.
Hi Andro, i have mars and mc (not conj)in sag square pluto and used to get quite rageful when i was young. Working out definitely helps me let off steam but if i cant for any reason dancing round the living room helps (the music is therapeutic too). Fighting with my duvet is another way – just lie under it and punch and kick all you like, no damage. Cushions too. Singing very loud in the car, running very fast on the spot, i could go on. Square mercury..maybe you could find a friend you could trade insults with. I have a friend who i’ve known for years and we love bitching at each other for fun, see who can come up with the best insult, as long as its not personal it can be very funny. And laughter is the ultimate in releasing feel good endorphins. Just get it out before it eats you.
thanks guys, these are good suggestions.
unfortunatly i feel the endless kind streak the only rule i have (as working as a chef) is “whats said in the kitchen stays in the kitchen” this is the only thing in my life i feel strongly about not sure if this is right or not but in every other respect im very emotionless all fun as a libra but not comfortable with lieing or distrust.